Using Food to Cope

So as I was driving home from work today I started thinking.  Probably because the day was mildly disappointing and a little emotional but I was thinking how it use to be soo nice to be able to come home, shut away the world and just eat.  Food was my friend, my boyfriend, acceptance basically anything that I needed from life, except it wasn't, it was false contentment and I know that and that's not me anymore and I don't want the food, it's just sometimes I miss those days where I could truly escape from the world and all the feelings and situations that made life rough sometimes.  I still haven't found something as good as food when it comes to coping with the world so I'm not exactly sure how I've been coping for 8 months because that's how long it's been since I gave up that way of life; I suppose I just make myself move onto the next day.  But still sometimes I miss it.  Don't get me wrong, I would never ever go back to how life was before, but I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else ever feels this way.

I feel that way very frequently. I was trying to explain EXACTLY this to my husband. When I get stressed, I can't just nibble on something now. I don't have that release anymore. Taking a walk or drinking a glass of water doesn't do it for me. 

how funny that just based on your name "TheDeathStar" i've always assumed you were a guy, lol.  i had to re-read your post to make sure I read "husband."   hehe

LOL. Nope. Not a guy. Just a huge nerd. 

I know what you mean.  Thing is, even in those days there was almost a frantic scramble to get said comfort food ready to eat, or procured from whatever pizza joint or fast food joint I chose to provide it, and then to scarf it down to the point of feeling ill.  Truly an eating disorder displayed by that behavior in my own case. 

What you are doing now is soooooo much better. 

Do you have a hobby or an interest?  Lately my husband and others have been pushing me to take up a hobby because my main hobby -- eating -- is gone, and I need to distract myself from some stresses.  I stumbled upon the Filofax craze -- think scrapbooking, but with utility and a usefulness that scrapbooking doesn't necessarily justify  -- and have begun to refashion my very necessary Franklin Covey planner into what they call a "faux Filofax."  Not saying that is the answer for you, but if you have a hobby or interest, maybe now is the time to invest more time and attention in it and generally keep busy and productive. 

Hang in there, my dear.  You are doing so marvelously well!!

I feel this way a lot. I'm working on it with my therapist. On days when I'm not too upset, I can use knitting or other hobbies to help as coping mechanisms. We've had a lot of rough days lately, though, and I've definitely fallen back on food. Fortunately, my sleeve helps me with my reduced capacity.

I do use hobbies or music or basically any other distractions and it works pretty well; I was just remembering though just how mindless food made me and nothing has given me that feeling like food has.  Not to say that I want to revert to my old ways for that feeling, it just was nice when the emotions were on the rollercoaster that is life and being a woman def. doesn't help lol

One interesting thing I've found since I've lost my excess weight is that I want to check into life a lot more rather than checking out.  Just a very cool side effect.  I think you'll find that to be the case as well.  :)

Very much so is this true for me. I find myself wanting to go and just do life a lot more! Check into things that get me out and about. However on the other note... when I have had a rough day I do find myself fighting the food for no reason thoughts... and sometimes the actions in the midst! I know when those actions are trying to take over and it can be a fight! Being aware is my first note... then my actions may even get to the point of food going into my hands and to my mouth. I have taken the food and dumped into the garbage and then thought about why I chose to do that. I feel good when I win and the garbage can gets that. I then reflect and work to devise a plan for next time I feel that way! Losing the weight after weight loss surgery is fairly easy... developing those strategies to keeping it off is a challenge. My scale has magical moments where I love it and then those moments where I wonder if I am failing. Letting go of my perfectionism and accepting myself right where I am at is key to me. I cause myself more stress by being so afraid of failure. A fine line... cause I always want to be aware of where I am on the scale. I want to always feel like doing life!
Eating freely and anytime not caring about calories or when I should stop eating... those are the things of my past. I love my current living and the abundance of doors that have opened for me to be able to come and go and do the things in and of the world!!!
But I hear your thoughts on missing that....
But I to love the new things in life so much more.....

Your comment on "eating freely and anytime" struck a chord with me.  I had someone recently say something to me in a pitying way about not being able to eat whatever I want anymore.  It wasn't a slam, just someone's reaction.  I gently let the person know that I was much, much happier with the current status quo and wouldn't trade it for anything.  :)

It is sooooo freeing not to have food be the center of my universe anymore and not letting it dictate my moods and the general flow of my life.  We attended a Christmas party tonight in someone's home, brimming with foods of many kinds.  I had already consumed all of my planned calories for the day, so I was quite content with my water bottle and a comfy seat in the rec room, away from the kitchen.  Awesome.  Not even tempted.