Support Group Letdown

Good morning, friends!  Today is my sixth month out from surgery and I am feeling pretty good. I've had my ups and downs but for the most part, I know what works for me and I am trying to keep myself on track.

Last night was the monthly bariatric support group for the hospital where I had my surgery. There are patients from about six or seven different surgeons that attend this group. I went to the group about a month after my surgery and was disappointed.  It seemed like a lot of complaining and people with bad attitudes.  There really weren't many questions and people looking for answers... it was like people just wanted to come and complain but didn't want to hear any suggestions from the others who had done the work and been there already.

I decided to try again last night to see if maybe I would have a different perspective of the group. Nope... seems to be the same thing. People were just complaining and highjacking the meeting and when others tried to offer suggestions they didn't seem to want to listen.  There were a few people there that had surgery years ago and had done a fabulous job of keeping their weight off and I would have loved to have heard more from them. But the newer people with all their complaints took over the meeting.

So I guess I'm done with the peer to peer support group. They have some groups that have certain topics where a presentation is given and I may try those instead. Seems like less of just an open forum and more educational. Has anyone else been disappointed by the support group for their surgeon?  Any other suggestions?  I really would like to have a monthly thing that I go to about weight loss and my surgery... I feel it keeps my lifestyle change and my hard work in the front of my mind and keeps me focused, kind of like coming to OH but in real life! :-)

Thanks everyone! Have a great day!

Hey,

I too decided to skip last night (now I was I hadn't) I would have loved to meet you and talk. Surgery is Friday and I was really needing the support, but like you didn't find the past meetings that helpful.

There are a couple of things coming up, I would like to attend, let me if you decide to go. If not, we can start our own little group!!!

Surgery on Friday. Getting nervous. 

Hey Lois! I wish you would have come so we could have met.  I think I am planning on going to the Body Image meeting on Thursday, July 25th. I am going to see if those groups are a little more educational and helpful.  I'll message you my cell phone # so that I can check in with you after surgery! Two more days!! :-)

There are two other people in Jax that I have met in real life from OH and we have met for coffee a few times but we haven't met in a couple of months because everyone is so busy during summer.  I will let you know next time we meet!

That would be great. I "joined" a couple of the Jax groups, but so far there has not been much activity nor did I get a response from either group. I feel like the goofy kid in middle school (no one wants to play with me.  LOL) Just kidding, I realize people are busy or they may not be an active group any longer.

I too would like to attend the body image meeting and I saw where they have a movie night (at the hospital) and also an exercise class. Have you been to either of those before? I should be well enough to attend on the 25th, right?

Would love to meet up with you and others anytime!! I will send you my cell # also

2 days to go, I'm freaking out!!!!! Actually getting a little scared now. It's getting real. I think I have read to many posts where people are regretting the surgery right after.

Thanks so much for your encouragement!!!!

Just keep looking for a good one. I've also interjected in a meeting something like, "Wow, sounds like a lot of you are struggling... I'd like to put some positivity into group tonight by sharing....XYZ".

Sometimes it just takes one person speaking up to change the course a bit.

Very true! I'm just a little shy about sharing my experiences cus I'm only 6 months out. Maybe I will try again in a few months and try to contribute more.

I do not attend the group for my surgeon since I would have to drive an hour and pay for parking, but I go to one locally. If you cannot find one with a positive vibe, start one! You have a great outlook and shouldn't let a bunch of negative nellies hold you down!

Yea, mine is about 35 minutes away from me. I'm used to having to drive for a while to get anywhere living in Jacksonville, FL. This place is SOOO spread out. I have a few people I go to coffee with, I would like to try to get more to join us.

Thanks, Kate!

Hey Kitty,

Someone mentioned a while back that OH has some sort of training so you can start a support group in the area where you live. I live in a small town so this might be a possibility for me after surgery when I am feeling good!  May want to check with them, I think you would be a great leader!

Smiles:),

Lisa

I'll definitely look into that! Thanks, Lisa!