fattest gal at the nutrision class

Well had my class yesterday i felt good about going and was excited that i would actually be in a crowb of ppl that would understand where i am and where i am trying to go....well i opened the door and looked around and to my amazement i was the biggest person there....some of these ppl was at the size i would consider ok..i felt out of place even at a stupid nutrision class i have been the big one for so long at any event or anything pretty much that i go to that i thought maybe i would fit in better and whats even worse this loud mouth that kept talking in the back of the class actually looked me up and down while i was standing waiting to go to the bathroom... I am by no means ugly i am super big but i am not ugly and i wanted to slap her lol how can someone judge me when we really are on the same journey? I might have a longer one but we are still on the same journey.. sorry i just needed to vent i am just so tired of being trapped in this body im so tired of being judged even by other large ppl...

some people really have no class. 

I can relate. I always hated being the biggest person in the room, even at nutrition class. I just wanted to blend in and now I do. You will, too. Hang in there!!

Try not to let other people's thoughts, words, or actions get to you. Some people are just rude. 

I'm so sorry that that lady was like that. Unfortunately, there's always a bad apple in every bunch.

We judge each other. We do. We can say that we don't, but read what you wrote again:

some of these ppl was at the size i would consider ok

I'm NOT judging you based on those comments, but this is something I caught myself doing and my therapist pointed it out. Who am I to judge their weight and what they are comfortable in? I remember seeing people STARTING their journey at my original doctor's goal weight, ya know? I remember thinking, "they aren't that big, they can diet that off easily". But then I remember that I was their size many years ago and I wasn't able to diet it off. At least they were doing something about it earlier. So I changed that around to commending them for having the fortitude to deal with it now.

I hope you take those comments in their spirit they are meant.

I deal with these comments now and then. "You don't need to lose any more weight, you're getting too skinny". Really? Cuz my doctor's are all thrilled and helping me figure out what my goals should be. But thanks for making me feel bad about my accomplishments.

Again, I'm so sorry you dealt with that lady. What a ***** To so openly be judgmental like that just means that she has a lot of work to do on herself. I kind of feel sorry for her. I know all too well that feeling of being the biggest person in the room. ((HUGS))

Thanks for the replies and i guess we do really judge even if we dont mean to... I just kept looking at them thinking i wish i was the size that they are and it hurt.... i think maybe i do need to start seeing a dr and working on my issues while i am going thru this whole process.. i am so mentally drained from everything thats happened in my life i guess i just needed to feel accepted... I really appreciate the comments and i will work on everything you said..me thinking they are ok was me really saying i think i would he happy at that size and your right everyones idea of their perfect size is completely different and i honestly hope that mean lady has a very successful weight loss and i really do wish her my best because i know how miserable it is to not feel happy in your own skin... I am just so stressed out we are living with my mother in law right now and she is...not so pleasant to live with...his grandpaw even made comments about my weight but currently we are stuck here and i am just sad.....like i said alot going on and the posibility of being able to maybe getting approved for this surgery has gave me some hope that things will get better for me personally...i dunno sorry im rambling im gonna go take a nap and cry myself to sleep!

My therapist has been instrumental in my success - for me, it was a must and a huge part of my journey to where I am now. HUGS.

Hi,

I can relate to all the feelings you are dealing with now.  I am down 100 pounds this week, and I noticed for the first time in many years that I was no longer always the largest person in the room.  I just want you to know its coming.  In 3 or 6 months, you'll get there.  All those feelings of being different and judged will start to fade.  You'll feel so much better.

My weight-loss hospital has a monthly support group for bariatric surgery, and I've found good support there.  The vets are eager to share their success stories.  They know how stressful it is to go thru the WLS journey, and are eager to encourage the novices.  I hope you find a support group that will encourage you where you can share your experiences without judgment. 

There is such a stigma with being obese in our culture.  It wears us down and makes us feel less than or undeserving.  But we have to remember that we do deserve health and success.  Thank goodness that we live in a time when weight-loss surgery is available and relatively safe.  we have a path to overcoming our obesity and you are on the road.  Just keep the faith.  You'll get there.

best wishes,

Carol

I had to do 3 months of classes for my insurance before I could have surgery. I was by far the largest person. I hated some of those people - they bragged about gaining some weight to qualify and trying to trick the system to qualify for some co-morbs. They made comments that made my stomach sick. 

I took that and i said **** you douchebags - and I worked my butt off during those 3 months, and I wa the ONLY one to reach my 1-% goal, and one of 3 (out of 30) that lost ANY weight. They were put in their place during the last session when the lady announced that...and told the other 27 that they were in serious risk of not being able to have surgery due to lack of weight loss. 

So, take this time, turn it around, make it into something postive. I ABSOLUTELY understand how hard that is when you are miserable, but it's possible. Pursue your goals - get healthy, get active, and your mind will start following.

 

Some people just completely suck. She is one of them. This is your life and your surgery. Try to shake off the ******** and keep on keeping on.
I hated being the biggedt person in the room too. Even now that I am not, I sometimes still see peoplr looking at me and want to ask them what they are staring at. I still am a fat girl in my head.
Just do what you need to do and ignore the people who aren't helpful or supportive. They will get caught up in their own bs.

Hi Molly!

I'm also used to being the biggest girl in the room.  I went to my nutrition session and was in there with one person. An older man that was pretty large. He was nice but the director decided it would be fun to do some math with our weight and put both of ours up on this whiteboard. I weighed 362 and he weighed 270... that was so embarrassing! I weighed almost a 100 pounds more than this man... Thank God their weren't more people! I don't think I could have handled a room full of people and everyone comparing their weights to mine.

We have all been there before just like you. Keep going with pursuing the surgery and you'll look back at this in a year's time and it will be a distant memory!