Struggling through a loss of a loved one...

I am going into my 7th month post op sleeve.  My dad lost his battle with colon cancer oct. 29th.. My life feels it went way off kilter.  The first week after his death was halloween and my poor 5 year olds' stash was invaded and I gained 3 lbs that week!  I have lost maybe 5 lbs since and it has been 2 1/2 months since my dad passed--- 1/2 lb here 1/2 lb there..I am afraid that I have stretched out my stomach pouch... I know that I need to try to get back on track.. Especially with being accountable for every ounce of food that I eat. 

Has anyone dealt with a death since surgery.. did you turn to food??

It's been a rough year for me. My grandmother passed away this year as did a good friend of mine. I think the friend loss was worse than my grandmother because it was so unexpected. Either way I didn't turn to food. I snuggled my pup and cuddled other critters and made it through. That's me though. Everyone handles it in different ways. 

Don't worry about stretching out your pouch. It can happen but what is most likely occurring is that you are turning to slider foods because those are mostly  comfort foods. Sad when the food that gives you the comfort is the worst for you. But at least you recognize it. So back on track. Cut out carbs, toss out the candy, get rid of anything that is not on the plan. Get back on plan and track your food so you don't have any more slip ups. At least it's only 5lbs and no 50. You can do this!

know the feeling my father in law died a few days before Xmas , after a week of every little thing going wrong and saying there only little things then I get a phone call from the police that they found him dead

 I was able to stay on track and even lost a few lbs, he would not want me to fail for any reason

its not very easy to stretch out you stomach in a short time , just get back on plan and the lbs will fly back off

 my husband had colon cancer a few years back but he was one of the lucky ones and beat it, so I know what you are going through, my best friend also died of throat cancel around thanksgiving so the holidays suck for me , no reason to eat to celebrate

 sorry for your lose , you will be back on track soon

Hi, I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this.  I lost my son suddenly at the age of 26 two years ago.  I had my surgery 2/05 and lost 134 lbs.My husband had the surgery 4 years ago and lost 85 lbs and has gained it all back because of his death.  In the last two years I have gained 25 lbs.  I am happy to hear that you have recognized that you have fallen astray. My suggestion to you is to start back on track and eat that protein and follow the guidelines that we were given on the carbs, sugars and fats.  You will get there, trust in yourself and believe in yourself.  Your Dad wouldn't want you to fall back to your old habits.  I am taking those sugars out of my diet and going back to the protein shakes and eating a lot of protein again in hopes that I can get the weight off.  I felt so good about myself back then and had confidence in myself.  I NEVER want to go back there again.  I believe in you and know you can do it.

i havent delt with any deaths, but ive sure turned to food through some other emotionally trying times. It happens. Ive come to accept the fact that I can control those behaviors, but I will never eliminate the desire, or even the fact that it will happen. Since I'm not a particular food snob, just eating seems to be my "comfort" zone - so eating PB2 and celery or greek yogurt or a protein shake will do the same thing has junky/carby/sugary food so I do my best to keep those bad things away from me when I'm reaching for food. 

If you can, try and seek out counseling or therapy to help you cope. We need to learn to be able to deal with life and the trying times without resorting to food if we can - it will be the key to maintaining our weight over time. Food will only be a temporary solution - it wont fix anything, bring your loved ones back, or make you feel any better for more than the 5 minutes it takes to eat. 

Im sorry for your loss. 

As im in the process of trying to get back on track, one thing I suggest is using some kind of app or method for tracking every bite - make sure you weigh and measure everything so that you get an accurate count. Just seeing in numbers the **** i put in my mouth sometimes is enough to make me walk away (i usually try to enter the food before I eat it) . 

I am so sorry for your loss. I am so sorry for everyone here who has lost someone they love. Losing a loved one is very stressful and painful.

I know when my mom passed away last year I quit eating. I am that person. When I am stressed or in severe emotional pain/distress I cannot eat. But when I do begin eating again....look out!

Something that I am learning thru this process is; if I keep pushing myself physically, my eating habits can stray and I do not gain. So I don't stop moving. I keep working out no matter what. That is the constant for me. I also know that eventually I can get my eating back to what it needs to be, knowing I am at least doing something to stay in my journey to a normal weight/BMI. Do you have an activity you can do that will help relieve some of the stress? Even 10 minutes per day  will help. You will not believe how exercise can relieve pain and stress.

I doubt you stretched your pouch. 6 months after surgery the swelling goes down and we feel like we can eat more because we can. You are probably eating less dense protein which fills up the pouch quickly. Eat a hard boiled egg and a slice of bacon and I think you will feel very full.

Have you thought about seeing a professional about learning to deal with all these changes you are going through? Sometimes it only takes a short time to get back on track when you have the help of a good therapist. I strongly urge you to do that. You have had a lot to deal with in a short time. You also have to care for a 5 y/o through all of this. That's a lot.

We have ALL turned to food when we are sad and happy. I think we are all emotional eaters. Just because we have had our tummies surgically changed doesn't mean our minds change automatically. That is where the therapy and/or exercising helps.

God bless you my dear one,

Sharon

Info about your pouch and how to keep it full 

http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/vsg/4597191/Pyloric-Valve-101-Repost/#38114716

Good Luck,

Sharon