You Don't Have to Be Perfect to Lose Weight

Small Bites for Your Life 
The Weekly Newsletter from:
National Association for Weight Loss Surgery   
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You Don't Have to Be Perfect to Lose Weight
By Katie Jay, MSW, Certified Life Coach
Director, National Association for Weight Loss Surgery
www.nawls.com  

Have you tried the Seafood Diet? Actua lly, it's spelled "See-Food." So many of us have tried it. You know the one. You "see food," and you eat it.   One of my coaching clients, JoAnn, went on that diet last weekend. She ate anything she saw that looked good to her -- at home (white toast with butter, a handful of chocolate chips, crackers), at a gas station (trail mix), and at a friend's house (chips and dip, corn bread) -- and she was heartbroken about it.   Why Did She Do It? Said JoAnn, "I'd like to blame it on my hormones, or on the fact that my life is stressful. I could blame it on my frustrating food addiction, or maybe even on depression. But, honestly, I don't know what made me do it.

And if I don't know the cause, I can't fix the problem."   Her unspoken message to herself was: "I will keep making poor food choices until I find out why I do this to myself." It almost sounded like JoAnn had made a decision to stay on the "See-Food Diet" indefinitely. 

But "Why" Only Matters if You're Perfect   In a perfect world, knowing the root cause of her grazing would be helpful, but today JoAnn doesn't know the root cause. So, that's not information that will get JoAnn back on track right now -- and now is her moment. It's all she's got. 

JoAnn's Perfectionism Is in her Way   When you go on the "See-Food Diet" it's easy to tell yourself, "Now that I've blown it, I might as well keep eating." JoAnn basically decided if she wasn't going to follow her plan exactly, she was a failure -- and she planned to act accordingly.  JoAnn was being so unreasonable in her expectations of herself it's no wonder she felt doomed.

 Imperfection Happens   I'm sure many WLS patients go on the "See-Food Diet" from time to time. Life happens. But, you can't stay on that diet. And the longer you put off getting back on track, the more damage you will do to your body, mind, and spirit.  

To banish your perfectionism, and the all-or-nothing attitude it burdens you with, try these three tips: 
1) Allow yourself to make mistakes so you can learn. When you feel anxious or sad for having done something imperfect, switch from the self-critical "giving-up mode" to "learning mode." Instead of berating yourself the way JoAnn did, ask yourself: "What can I learn from this mistake and what can I do differently right now?"  

2) Be realistic. Making one mistake does not mean you are *always* making mistakes. When you start to feel like you're a hopeless case, ask yourself: "Is that really true? Realistically, what else can I do?"  

3) Lower your standards. Practice making a few mistakes on purpose. Then, practice doing a few tasks less thoroughly than you would have in the past. As you practice you will develop a tolerance for imperfection. And remember, practice makes ... well, maybe not.  

You Don't Have to Be Perfect to Lose Weight   Let's say you do what you need to do to lose weight and keep it off 90 percent of the time. You'll probably do pretty well. Why don't you give it a try and find out. It sure beats ZERO percent of the time, doesn't it?
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