Anyone else afraid to set a goal weight?

Okay... so, I started with a BMI of 58... over 200 excess pounds to lose.  To be honest, I was afraid to ever set a goal weight.  It just seemed so far away; so unattainable.  Did anyone else experience this?  Have you met your goal?  Whatever that may be?

I have always just wanted to be healthier and to move more and to do the things I couldn't do before.  I didn't want my size and weight to be the dominating factor in my life.

Your thoughts would be appreciated....

S

I have not set a goal weight at this time.   I've gotten hung up on the numbers way too many times in the past, and did not want to do that again.  I have other goals .. like reducing or getting off of meds, feeling more energetic, getting through the day without excruciating back and knee pain, etc.  Perhaps, as I begin to feel better and participate more in life I'll rethink setting that particular goal, but I'm happy without having it right now.   

Ironically, my reason for having WLS surgery was NOT to lose weight.  It was to get healthier, move more, and not let my life be dominated by my size.  Losing weight was simply a side effect.  Does that make sense?

However, now that I have lost over 175 lbs, I am 'considering' a goal NUMBER.  I have already fit into all of my 'goal' clothes and have begun to experience life in a different manner.

Thanks for your feedback!

This quote from Alice in Wonderland encapsulates how I feel about goal weight:

"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.
"I don’t much care where--" said Alice.
"Then it doesn't’t matter which way you go," said the Cat.

Without a goal to strive towards- I would just wander aimlessly.  Personally I'm not going to beat myself up if I don't make it there, but it's my goal and I'm working towards something.

Along the way I've gotten my health and my life back, and I know that things will just keep getting better as I keep working hard... just my 2 cents...

Me too! I set my "temporary" goal at 170 pounds - the lowest weight I ever was as an adult. I'm just about there now & hope to meet that goal when I have my hernia repair & tummy tuck in November. Now, I'm thinking of setting it lower to get to an "overweight" BMI - right now, I am still "obese" per the BMI scale. I think that would be 163 pounds for my height. Either way, I am thrilled with where I am & if I don't lose any more....... that's OK by me! I'm in my mid-fifties & at  my age, I notice the face really droops, so I don't want to get too skinny! Good luck with your decision!

Hey Sharon! I had set a goal of 190, revised it to 230, set another goal of 250, and now that I've been stalled for more months than I can count, I have thrown my hands up in the air wondering if I'll make any of them.

 in the begining of my journey my goal was to just feel better... get off some meds, become mobile again.. an most of all independant... i was tired of depending on others for my daily needs...through diet, excercise, wls, some plastics recently...a close eye on intake.. support from friends.. my goals have changed quite a few times... it doesnt have to be about numbers on a scale or the xxxxx on the lables.. its more about how u feel when u wake up in the morning... changing ur first thoughts from negative to positive ones... like wow.. i think today will be a nice day... instead of oh great its Monday etc.. its all attitute, courage, preserverance.. u cant let anyone else tell u where u should be (refering to ur journey) only u have the claim as where u should be at any given time... an u shouldnt beat urself up over numbers... ever... with that said... i do sorta havea goal weight in mind.... its a silly one that makes me smile.... because its a bad memory that i intend on turning around.... when i was 10 in grade school we had to line up to be weighed an measured etc... an i remember being horribly embarressed because i was  WEIGHHHHHHH bigger then other kids... most were 45-65 lbs.. an i was  215 at 10.... 10... so......... for now my goal number is 215... my starting heightest recorded weight was 510 an give or take depending on the day im under 250 now  im getting there slowly but surely.... i want to be able to say... i weight my grade school weight.... not many  will top that lol 

 I'm there too!  Haven't set a goal weight because I thought it seemed so far away and unattainable.  But now 110 lbs about half way to the "ideal" weight, I am considering setting a goal too.  But first I am setting mini goals.  My first was 50 lbs, then it was 100 lbs, now I am thinking 150 lbs.  Maybe when I get there I will think about the goal.  Otherwise it can seem so daunting. 

I randomly chose a goal. I decided I wanted to be under 200, and I was not worried about being thin. So, I decided 180 (153 lb loss) would be a good goal. HILARIOUS! I didn't even know what someone who weighed 180 looked like. I have always been heavy and have NO idea what the numbers look like, or what sizes people are. I am very unequipped to be setting goals! That said, I am pushing onward to 180. Maybe I will get there. Maybe I will stay there. I try not to worry about numbers because the one thing I am sure of is that it will never be enough in my mind. I am not sure what actually defines "success" in this surgery. Good luck! (neighbor =o )

Oh, totally!

I was never under 200 as an adult. I lost sight of Onderland at age 13 or so and have no idea what I would look or feel like in that zone. I have never shopped in a regular sized store. I have almost always been the biggest person in a room.

So at first I just said: under 200. There's a lot of weight to lose between now and then, and getting back to my 13 year old weight? Crazy!

Then I went to the surgeon, and he told me that my ideal body weight would be 137. I laughed. I still don't think that's the case. I remember my sister, who is exactly my family type, height etc, who was running and near starving herself in high school. She never got under 160, and when she was under 170 she looked unhealthy.

So, I have no idea, really. I figure I will set a renewable goal of ten pounds and keep doing that until a nurse or doctor tells me that I can stop.

Can you imagine being a "normal" BMI? Mind-blowing.