Anyone hear this during preop diet?
"So why can't you just keep doing what your doing?" or "Why don't ya just keep doing the shakes, you don't need that surgery!" Referring to the preop diet..... It's sort of a compliment because they notice you are losing but not sure how to take it... I want to say Gee why didn't I think of that!? lol :D
Would I be getting cut up, poked on, and rearranged if I thought I could do it long term w/o surgery? Come on! This was not an easy decision or a hasty decision, but the most thought out decision in my life besides marriage and kids of course. :)
I didn't get that as much as, "You don't need this surgery, you are beautiful." and such variations of how "pretty" I am and shouldn't worry about it.
Although it was very nice of them and I know they only said it because of the risks associated, they didn't understand the health issues I was facing and how I felt.
I will say now that these same people are very supportive after my surgery and tell me how great I am looking and how proud they are of me.
Take it with a grain of salt that these folks probably have fears for you and really care about you but when you take the step and start becoming more healthy, they will hopefully be a supporter and champion for you!
Although it was very nice of them and I know they only said it because of the risks associated, they didn't understand the health issues I was facing and how I felt.
I will say now that these same people are very supportive after my surgery and tell me how great I am looking and how proud they are of me.
Take it with a grain of salt that these folks probably have fears for you and really care about you but when you take the step and start becoming more healthy, they will hopefully be a supporter and champion for you!
Sometimes it's just their way of "protecting" you from surgery. Consider it that they mean well and just find a short, pithy retort. "Thanks for your input, I consider everyone's opinion" OR "Glad you see my success - thanks!" or something along those lines. I often think that less is more - you don't have to explain every move, decision, thought... just go basic!
All the best - you are doing well.
All the best - you are doing well.
Mary
"Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you CAN do." John Wooden
I'm down 120 pounds - thanks to RNY! Working on the next 25. Then I'll tackle more...
"Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you CAN do." John Wooden
I'm down 120 pounds - thanks to RNY! Working on the next 25. Then I'll tackle more...
your right. They care otherwise they wouldn't say anything. After awhile though, it's like enough already, I get it. :) My mom being the main person, she wants me to talk to my aunt who is a nurse and who has seen all the horror stories about the complications with WLS, etc. etc. BUT she is coming to "take care of me" during and after surgery, so I know it's with love. :)
You are doing well on your liquid diet and deserve to be complimented on it. So, take the compliment and bask in it, and let the rest roll off like water over oil. I mean, the general population (even the lighweight / overweight population) does not understand the unique challenges we in the super obese category struggle with on a daily basis. And those with no weight problem cannot comprehend why those of us who do have a weight problem can't just stop eating. It isn't their fault. They just don't struggle with the same issues we do and can't understand.
Years ago, my husband (6' 3" tall and 175 pounds) couldn't understand either. But as the years went by, and he watched me try time after time to get it under control only to gain a few inches and then loose a few feet he began to understand. And when finally I was desperate enough to seriously entertain the idea of surgery, he was behind me.
We both knew if I kept going the way I was, then the day was soon going to come when I could not even be ambulatory enough to do my desk job. He told me once, (fearfully and lovingly, not trying to demean me) that he was afraid I was going to become one of those people who get so large they can't get out of their own houses because they won't fit through doors. It was a real possibility for me. I was never one who attained a 'top weight' and hung out there for my entire adult life. I was always gaining or loosing. Mostly gaining - at the rate of 20 pounds a year most years.
But most, never understand. And Mary is right: keeping your responses to them to a minimum is best. Fortunately, you've connected with us. And we get it. We're all behind you, will do all we can to support you in your journey, and will be some of your biggest cheerleaders (no pun intended!
)
Take care and keep up the good work!! connie
Years ago, my husband (6' 3" tall and 175 pounds) couldn't understand either. But as the years went by, and he watched me try time after time to get it under control only to gain a few inches and then loose a few feet he began to understand. And when finally I was desperate enough to seriously entertain the idea of surgery, he was behind me.
We both knew if I kept going the way I was, then the day was soon going to come when I could not even be ambulatory enough to do my desk job. He told me once, (fearfully and lovingly, not trying to demean me) that he was afraid I was going to become one of those people who get so large they can't get out of their own houses because they won't fit through doors. It was a real possibility for me. I was never one who attained a 'top weight' and hung out there for my entire adult life. I was always gaining or loosing. Mostly gaining - at the rate of 20 pounds a year most years.
But most, never understand. And Mary is right: keeping your responses to them to a minimum is best. Fortunately, you've connected with us. And we get it. We're all behind you, will do all we can to support you in your journey, and will be some of your biggest cheerleaders (no pun intended!
) Take care and keep up the good work!! connie
p.s: If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you always got... 
I've gotten both the "You don't need it" speech/talk along with the, "Keep doing what you're doing then" one.
Though I must say that for the most part everyone has said it's a good thing, my co-workers are aware of it. It's not something I have kept a secret. Not sure why anyone would. I know a few who dislike taking about it, I understand their reasoning but for e it's the opposite, it will be a part of who I am when it happens. Love it all or no at all.
Though I must say that for the most part everyone has said it's a good thing, my co-workers are aware of it. It's not something I have kept a secret. Not sure why anyone would. I know a few who dislike taking about it, I understand their reasoning but for e it's the opposite, it will be a part of who I am when it happens. Love it all or no at all.
Most Active
Recent Topics
