Need help seeing the glass half full...

Okay. I've lost 93+ lbs since surgery. I haven't weighed since my 6 month anniversary on the 15th, so it could be (I hope!) more. I look in the mirror, and I can the changes...sometimes to the point of not recognizing myself. But then...

I look again and see what's left: the thighs, the hips, the butt...and think..."Dang, I've lost nearly 100 lbs and I'm STILL fat!" I know I've accomplished a lot, but on the other hand, I've got a ways to go.

Struggling to maintain a positive attitude today...maybe its a TOM thing?
Any words of advice, besides "get your head together"? lol

I'm in the same boat, and I'm sure a lot of BMI 50+ people are about 6 months out. On one had we've lost a lot ...on the other we still have a ways to go.  It's especially hard when you look at lightweights who are just starting their journey at our weight!

I just keep reminding myself, that I've done an amazing job so far and to appreciate all the things that I can do now- that I couldn't before. In this time of stall which I am in, I'm just going to be patient, stay on track and wait for that scale to move. In the meantime I'm going to be enjoying my life and thinking positive thoughts about the future.

Good Luck to you too!

InkdSpEdTchr,

Thank you for this. Yeah, I'll see people posting about their "high" start weight, and it's 50 lbs less than I'm at now! Its a head trip. But yes, I can do ALL sorts of things I couldn't do 6.5 months ago. I used to use a wheelchair 50-75% of the time. I haven't been in one since 3 wks post op. I'm so thankful for that.

You have accomplished a lot!  I thing we all struggle with this from time to time.  I know I see me as a smaller version of my fat self if that makes any sense.  But look at all you can do now that you couldn't 7 months ago.  how much better do you feel.  Think about these accomplishments, and sometimes it helps to look at old pics and see what changes there truly are in even your appearance.  Unfortunately those of us who have a longer journey have to get through these phases.  I am sure TOM could play part, but also too is there anything else?  Have the compliments slowed? and you are feeling like nobody is still noticing?  Make sure you are not having negative talk in your head..this is my enemy.  Come up with a mantra to tell yourself when you are feeling this way...Ex. "I have accomplished a lot...I can walk up a flight of stairs, sleep at night, cross my legs(whatever)and I will ride on a rollercoaster, shop in normal stores...because I am doing what I need to do to accomplish these things and I will persevere"  You know something along those lines....Or simply"I can do this" that works too.  But you are not alone, and we are here to support you!

  I am sure TOM could play part, but also too is there anything else?  Have the compliments slowed? and you are feeling like nobody is still noticing?  Make sure you are not having negative talk in your head..this is my enemy.

The compliments are coming in steady, but I don't feel deserving of them. I'm always deflecting them, and saying how much I have left to lose. Seriously, how hard is it to say "thank you?" Negative talk is definitely a player.

All of us here on BMI > 50 have a long row to hoe...

Every once in a while I have freakouts about my recurrent stalls, edema, the difference in sizes between my top and my bottom, my batwings and other hanging skin, my scraggly  hair, you name it, we all have similar things going on.

IN THE BIG PICTURE -- IT WILL GET BETTER.

FOR US, IT'S NOT ABOUT BECOMING A SUPER MODEL. WE'RE GOING FOR MORE NORMAL.

WE WILL TAKE THE STAIRS AND NOT HAVE TO CATCH OUR BREATH!!
WE WILL SHOP IN NORMAL STORES!!
WE WILL GO ANYWHERE AND NOT HAVE PEOPLE STARING AT US JUST BECAUSE WE'RE FAT (it's okay if they stare because we are stunning with loads of self confidence, tho!)!!
... add your item here

I don't think any of us are going to get through this without some issues (and if somebody is doing that, I want to know what drugs they're on because I need me some).

I'm down 131 pounds (on a good day [not today]). Already I'm seeing that I've shifted into the public perception category of "FAT". Which is great, because I used to be "CIRCUS FAT."

But, more important is that I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER. I can move my legs better. I'm not dead tired at the end of the day, every day. My high blood pressure is gone. My prediabetes went away.

Sweetie, you're doing great. Find some pictures of yourself at max weight and take a long, hard look. (Personally, I have some video tape of myself walking around in my kitchen at 388 pounds that makes me want to hurl. I'm saving that for my next major post op pity party.)

IT WILL GET BETTER.

((HUGS))

Every once in a while I have freakouts about my recurrent stalls, edema, the difference in sizes between my top and my bottom, my batwings and other hanging skin, my scraggly  hair, you name it, we all have similar things going on.

You're in my head. "Circus fat" made me laugh til I cried because its SO accurate!

Thank you for the laugh and emotional booster shots. <---And that's aimed at all of you. You all ROCK hard.

Great responses!  I have lost 52 lbs in 10 weeks.  I haven't been this size in about 11 years...but most of the time I don't see that.  I hold up my new size 22 jeans when I am folding them out of the laundry and think - wow these look too little to fit, wonder if they shrunk - but put them on without a problem!

In my head, I still feel like I am a size 30/32.  I don't feel like I have lost 52 lbs.  I am wondering when I will feel it.  BUT - I can walk alot faster - I can go up the stairs a lot faster - I can cross my legs on the couch...I can play with my kids - I shoveled snow yesterday!  (I have a hernia right now or I would be doing a lot more)

Unless you have been through this process, no one understands what you are saying.  I am glad we have a place to share our feelings as we go through this journey!

I'm glad this board is here, too. Its such a relief to know someone else can relate.

Girl, you shoveled snow with a hernia!? Awesome that you were physically able to, but I wonder if that will make the hernia worse? (sorry, mama worry kicked in there! lol)

You're in a size 22?! Congrats! I started out at 30/32 but I'm now in 22/24 tops, 2x tops, and 26/28 bottoms. Well, maybe not, they're a little big, but still.

We do have a long road, but I agree its good to stop along the way and appreciate our changes, number of pounds lost, new clothes, new and improved abilities, etc.  You are fine.  Probably just focusing on negative thoughts because of TOM, like you guessed!  Take care - you are doing so well.