I am a person....

 I am new to this board, just had surgery 2.25.09 and am down over 130 pounds pre and post op.  I am proud of what I have accomplished on my journey but am finding that I am feeling like people are punishing me in some ways for working on myself.  Your message struck a cord I guess on how I have been feeling.  I just feel like because I am obese I am a non-person.

 I have had several friends whom have just dropped off the radar practically since the surgery.  The weird part is that they were very encouraging prior to the surgery.  I just do not get it.  

Then there is my workplace, I feel like now that I am working to change myself I am being discriminated against.  I was told I was being promoted...then something went wrong, turns out my bosses boss screwed up and didn't record something in a computer system so now I am not promoted.  This sucks and the part that is the worst is that they are just treating this like no big deal.  Let me tell you if it was them that was getting screwed over I am sure that something would be done. 

I am not sure who I am madder at, myself for continuing to give this job too much of myself and stressing out, working through lunch etc or them for treating me like this.  Sorry for the rant my first time on the board, I guess I am just a breaking point tonight.  Thinking about all I have to do and being frustrated by the situation.  

What I am proud of is that through all of this I have not resorted to food for comfort which had been my MO previously.  So that is something to be thankful for.  
Just wondering if I will ever be treated like a normal person????

What I am proud of is that through all of this I have not resorted to food for comfort

That's really awesome, what an accomplishment with all the stress you are under. Sending you lots of love, and hope for easier days....

Wow! You're doing great with the weight loss.

I know how you feel about promotion thing. I had a former supervisor tell me that he was trying to get me a huge pay raise. Then later he said the big boss nixed it. It would have been better had he never said anything about it.

It was nice that my boss held me in such high regard, but you feel like dirt when it falls through. Now everytime I see the big boss I just want to hiss at him.

I felt awful about it for a long time. All the extra hours I put in felt like they were for nothing. My attitude turned to crap. But I'm trying to slog it out until I lose enough weight (and the economy gets out of the crapper) to make a go for a new job.

I hope your management can make it right.

(((Hugs)))

 Thanks for the support, someday's it just all feels a bit overwhelming.  I know I just need to get over it and for me writing it down seems to help.  Thank you for the support, sorry that you had a similar experience!

Congradulations on the way you are handling yourself. Your supervisors should be shot.
Can I make one  suggestion?  When it's your lunch break, take it and do something like go outside for a breath of fresh air, take a small walk, run to the store or something.  This way, you get a mental break from the job and it might reduce a tiny bit of the stress level. If you take a small walk or do an errand, you've accomplished something. Your bosses  hopefully start  to appreciate you because  you're not there.
Our society is a bit hypocritical.  When we are fat,  nobody knows us.  We are invisable.  Yet, we lose weight and in shape,  everybody wants to be our best friend.
Keep up the good work.

 Thank you so much for the support.  I need to work on that it is just hard to get away but you are right I need to make a point of making some time for myself...  This became clearer this week as I got myself sick trying to eat/conference call and get some other things done at my desk....

 You had ur surgery 2 days after i had mine..  i feel like im being punished for working on myself as well.. my husband is comstantly saying i did this for myself... an i totally agree with him i did do this for me........ for the first time in my 33yrs of life im working on me.. i've felt like a non-person so long i treat myself like one.. to often.. i never give myself credit.. i judge myself uber harshly....i give my pets more respect then i give me.. and ur right ppl who were encouraging pre-op seem to disapeer when we actually make it to the next level of our goals.. when we need them the most.. thats what makes it so hard.. once again we find ourselves alone.. struggling.. trying to find our way in the dark.... Well i for one an tired of walking around blindly.. and with this tool i no longer have to.. it will guide me and mold me into the new me.... if i work at it an let it do what it was designed to do.. yes the surgery was on my tummy not my mind.. im working on the mind.. one meal.. one day.....one step at a time.. i also feel better writing things down.. and thats what this place is great for... not only can u let it out... but ppl can read it an maybe see another point of view u cant.. like u reminding me look forward...  i need some mental excercise..  im sorry that ur boss's are screwing u over... maybe u should ask to meet with them an discuss it... an let them know how u feel... and that if it were the other way around u wouldnt let them be screwed over the way u have been..  just my opinion... im not working atm.. im a writer.. but husband doesnt want me working hes old fashioned...  so i have my own battles there..  good luck with ur job... feel free to msg me anytime u need to vent.. *hugs*

~Peggy

 Thanks Peggy, I am sorry that you too are feeling some of the same things, kinda sucks huh....
I really am finding this forum to be so much more helpful than I thought originally.  It helps to just put out there what you are feeling and have some feedback that lets you know you are not crazy.  

It is great to have a virtual community that we can "lean" on and seek input from.  

Hugs to you and keep up the good work.  Saw your post on cleaning out your closet, kinda fun huh!

Cynthia

exactly i luv OH it lets me be me.. for a change an no one here judges me... an yes it was liberating like acknowledging the fact that i mean it this time around... not going back to being 453+ ever again! an by gettin rid of those clothes its like drawing that line for myself... 3x an down from now on...

 You go girl...I am hoping to get through the summer but know that my fall clothing is going to need replacement, I am so happy to be out of those as well.  

We have to celebrate these achievements even if it is just acknowledging them as an achievement.\