I feel so discouraged

I knew that I would have loose skin after surgery. It has always worried me. Truly, I sometimes wonder if (not healthwise, but egowise) it is better to be fat, than to have a saggy, lumpy, unproportioned body. I know this is extremely petty of me.

I am just so damn pissed at myself for letting my body get so huge, and my skin get so stretched out, that even after I lose the weight, I will still look really bad. I am only 26, and I have ruined my chance of ever being "sexy". I am worried my husband will think I look gross, and that other people will to. I wasn't expecting to be a model, or even thin really, I just wanted to look normal. I am growing more and more discouraged. I was so excited, and now I just feel pretty sad. I hope this doesn't get anyone  at me.......I don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings, what I am really hoping is that someone can truthfully say that even with all the extra skin, it is still way better than being fat, and it has all been worth it.....

Emilie

Hi Emile,

Now I am quite a bit older than you (46) and have lost at least 51 pounds since my surgery, but I still cannot fathom preferring the fat-filled bulges--nevermind the high premature mortality rate and host of major health issues--nevermind the pains and embarrassment of not fitting into "regular" clothing and seats--never mind the sweaty, out-of-breath norm during simple exertion--over the saggy extra skin after huge weight loss. Granted, the sagginess is not attractive, but you can dress nicely to cover problem areas and utilize the wonder shapers out there. As far as sex appeal goes, the high energy, healthy glow and increased stamina of skinny beats tight fatness any day, IMO. But I guess after effects of weight loss surgery are a concern to you; talk candidly with your husband who will probably still find you sexy (likely sexier) when you have achieved your weight loss goal.

Now I will re-post on this topic when I confront the saggy loose skin after I reach my goal...that's still over 150 pounds away. Best of luck to you in easing your mind regarding this issue, and good luck on your weight loss journey!

Hi Emilie,

I totally understand where you are coming from.  I have these same thoughts at times too!!  I am about 13 months out from my RNY, and have lost over 150#.  I have loose skin on my arms, boobs are flat, tummy is bumpy and saggy, and my thighs are saggy.  Even though I look like a melted candle, I still feel so much better.  I have gone from a size 34 pant to a 16.  I can hide all the loose stuff with great body armor.  I may not look sexy in the nude, but being more confident all around helps with that.  My hubby is great too me... he doesn't mind the extra stufff I have now... sex is so much better that it really doesn't matter.  I also have so much more energy...  You can get the skin taken care of with plastics, that is expensive, but I have seen some amazing results.  I know the only way I can afford all the plastics I want it to hit the lottery, but hey who knows perhaps someday I will. 

Just know that your feelings are valid, you will still feel better with the weight off, and some people are lucky and their skin bounces back a little bit better.  Talk to a trainer, they can help to target some of your trouble zones, so that the skin might not be as bad. 

Good luck to you

Caroline

Let me tell you, I'll take my loose ,saggy skin any day over being the way I was, I can now run around and play w/ my kids and fit into seats and Yes I have those days where I feel the same way, but all in all I am so much happier now then I was before WLS, I'll deal w/ my saggy skin and the day's i feel down about it I look @ my old picture's or I take out that one out fit that i wore all the time and that helps so much, hang in there it is so worth it! Take care Jenn

Thanks ladies :) I needed to hear those replies.

I'm right with you on that one! I'm only 33 (gasp! i'm getting old!) and i've never considered myself sexy before, and petty or not, i don't care, i want to be sexy in my own eyes! And i understand that whole pissed at yourself too. I look at a before and after comparision my husband did for me (it's on my profile if you want to take a look) and i realized i had actually gotten that big, that big meaning you know when you where younger and you looked at your friend and said "if i ever get that big, shoot me, ok?" well, i got that big and she didn't shoot me!

For me, i'm just working up my case for plastics so that my insurance will cover as much as i can get them too. The rest i plan on using my 401K, cuz like you, i'm young enough to build it up again and it's worth it to me. I knew going into surgery that plastics would be done, and i made my husband promise me that come hell or high water we would find the money to get it done.

So, until then, chin up! and pray for good cloths that made you look hot and hide the skin!