Internet dating? Oh boy...
Jana - How amazingly similar our stories sound!
When Clay and I met, I was ready for a romance, but he was married. He lived in Oregon and I was in PA. So we got to be friends instead, both of us intelligent, computer nerd types who were both fat. He was trying to fix a failing marriage. I was divorced (I left) and I was trying to both suggest things that might help and then also talking about when to give up - a lesson I had trouble learning as well.
I met a couple in RL who lived somewhat nearby for diner & drinks. We made plans to go to a Jackson Browne concert at Penn State together along with a mutual male (online) friend from the DC area. Well, Clay got sort of jealous, so I asked if he wanted to join us. He said if he made the trip, he'd want time alone with me, not sharing me with other friends. I was floored!
So he came and visited for a week. Our first meeting was when I picked him up at the local SC airport. We had talked online and on the phone for 3 months - I was probably stupid, but felt safe. I had my neighbors and friends on alert - they frequently checked in until we told them we were fine - LOL! So don't do what I do, do what I say. We were both very naive, but that makes us a good match, I guess.
When Clay and I met, I was ready for a romance, but he was married. He lived in Oregon and I was in PA. So we got to be friends instead, both of us intelligent, computer nerd types who were both fat. He was trying to fix a failing marriage. I was divorced (I left) and I was trying to both suggest things that might help and then also talking about when to give up - a lesson I had trouble learning as well.
I met a couple in RL who lived somewhat nearby for diner & drinks. We made plans to go to a Jackson Browne concert at Penn State together along with a mutual male (online) friend from the DC area. Well, Clay got sort of jealous, so I asked if he wanted to join us. He said if he made the trip, he'd want time alone with me, not sharing me with other friends. I was floored!
So he came and visited for a week. Our first meeting was when I picked him up at the local SC airport. We had talked online and on the phone for 3 months - I was probably stupid, but felt safe. I had my neighbors and friends on alert - they frequently checked in until we told them we were fine - LOL! So don't do what I do, do what I say. We were both very naive, but that makes us a good match, I guess.
I have met several people online and all in all it worked out well. Maybe not the fabulous 'soul mate' type of thing, but I would do it again. Maybe a little bit further down the line. You know how it is, got to get to a point in my life where I think I am ready to get out there again. The first relationship lasted a few years but he was the one with the self-esteem issues and therefore he would do stupid things sometimes and it got old. The other, well, I guess that was my fault...he was a really great guy but he was about 12 years older than me and at the time, I just couldn't get over that. Lesson learned. I figure the internet will probably be my best chance of meeting someone with a similar personality and similar goals.
Good luck and be safe.
Good luck and be safe.
50 pounds lost pre-op!
Stella,
I hope you have called him back! If you haven't CALL HIM BACK!!
Be brave! Step outside of that box you have yourself in girl! You are hot! You are dynamic! You are cute! You are fun! You are ready, you made the profile! Maybe you thought you wouldn't get any attention for awhile, but guess what! Jump in! With caution of course, just like all the girls have told you. Change is good!
I'm glad you posted this, I've been thinking about doing this too! My husband and I separated a year ago, February and the divorce was final this past March. Sometimes I'm so ready to jump in and try this form of dating, and other times I think I should wait. Ya, know until I've met my goal, had PS and I'm perfect. Like I'm going to ever be perfect.
I think the dog park is a great idea! The dogs will take some focus off the awkwardness of meeting for the first time! So, he's a dog lover and a Deadhead. You'll have stuff to talk about!
Let us know how it goes!
Diane
I hope you have called him back! If you haven't CALL HIM BACK!!
Be brave! Step outside of that box you have yourself in girl! You are hot! You are dynamic! You are cute! You are fun! You are ready, you made the profile! Maybe you thought you wouldn't get any attention for awhile, but guess what! Jump in! With caution of course, just like all the girls have told you. Change is good!
I'm glad you posted this, I've been thinking about doing this too! My husband and I separated a year ago, February and the divorce was final this past March. Sometimes I'm so ready to jump in and try this form of dating, and other times I think I should wait. Ya, know until I've met my goal, had PS and I'm perfect. Like I'm going to ever be perfect.
I think the dog park is a great idea! The dogs will take some focus off the awkwardness of meeting for the first time! So, he's a dog lover and a Deadhead. You'll have stuff to talk about!
Let us know how it goes!
Diane
Oh wow guys. It just keeps getting better!!!!!!!!!!
He had R N Y three years ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow. I can't wait to hang out. We just talked for two hours :)
He had R N Y three years ago!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wow. I can't wait to hang out. We just talked for two hours :)
Start: 487 lbs (8/07) Lost 81 lbs pre op on South Beach. 406 lbs at surgery (6/08). 179 post op, by 2011. I lost 308 lbs. Gained 98 while pregnant (2012-13) lost all but 25. My goal is to be 179 again!
Two years after that....
I could not be happier.
We hung out here last night! Very cool. I know...I know...I broke all the internet dating rules. He didn't kill me though. So far so good! (nothing happened...lol) We listened to a show and told stories. My dogs really like him.
Start: 487 lbs (8/07) Lost 81 lbs pre op on South Beach. 406 lbs at surgery (6/08). 179 post op, by 2011. I lost 308 lbs. Gained 98 while pregnant (2012-13) lost all but 25. My goal is to be 179 again!
Two years after that.... I could not be happier.
Dogs are usually good judges of character. I forgot you would be chaperoned by their watchful eyes. You KNOW that if someone tried to hurt you, they'd be on him in a flash.
I think having my big ole doggy "son" with me when Clay first came to visit made a difference in my comfort level. While Bruno liked Clay, if we sat too close for his taste, he'd try to get between!
I think having my big ole doggy "son" with me when Clay first came to visit made a difference in my comfort level. While Bruno liked Clay, if we sat too close for his taste, he'd try to get between!
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