It Took Me Right Back to Being Super Morbidly Obese
If only for a moment...
So, this morning after an awesome workout that I had to psych myself up for...I actually ran for 8 out of 17 minutes this morning. I walked 2 minutes then ran 2 minutes. The last time I tried, I think I was about 255 and I couldn't run for more than 45-60 seconds at a time.
Anyway, I was in the shower. Some of the showers have curtains and some don't. I go to the one on the end that doesn't have a curtain just because sometimes I don't like to bump into the curtain. Yucky other people's germs, you know?
So...showering, I had just finished shaving my legs and was moving to my underarms. I was shaving my right underarm and felt odd and looked up and there was a girl getting into the shower catty corner from me staring at me. All my sagging skin, fat, stretchmarks and all. You guys get the picture I'm sure. I was ticked off and said out loud as I turned my arse towards her..."I'm too sure!"
Now this little bit was all of about 5 feet tall...sorry Jen... and skinny. Looked like a runner. But that high that I was on from running turned to shame because of my icky, saggy, cellulited body. I was angry that I let her take that triumph from me.
When I got back to the locker room, I just dried off, dropped my towel and put on my bra and panties. I usually do that in the shower. But this morning, since I had an admirer, I decided to run around with the thunderthighs fully exposed so she could get a good look at them and I'm sure talk about me to all her friends. But you know what, I didn't care! For that split second, I was ashamed of my body when I caught her staring at me, but it didn't last long.
Because I know where I came from, and even though I will never be SMO again, I will still have sympathy for all of the girls who are still there and will be an advocate for them. I am so glad I realized that she couldn't take all of my accomplishments away from me. I am physically fit, I am not to far away from just being overweight (about 39 pounds) and I feel really good about myself.
Ladies, don't let anyone steal your thunder from you. Stand proud of your accomplishments. You have not taken the easy way out. You have altered your digestive tract because you know that's what it would take to do this successfully. You count your calories and protein grams daily. You exercise regularly. You offer hope and advice on this forum. You manage a crazy supplement schedule, and you also track your fluid intake daily. You have all accomplished much and will continue to climb even greater mountains as you move farther and farther away from your surgery date. YOU GUYS ARE ALL AWESOME!
So, this morning after an awesome workout that I had to psych myself up for...I actually ran for 8 out of 17 minutes this morning. I walked 2 minutes then ran 2 minutes. The last time I tried, I think I was about 255 and I couldn't run for more than 45-60 seconds at a time.
Anyway, I was in the shower. Some of the showers have curtains and some don't. I go to the one on the end that doesn't have a curtain just because sometimes I don't like to bump into the curtain. Yucky other people's germs, you know?
So...showering, I had just finished shaving my legs and was moving to my underarms. I was shaving my right underarm and felt odd and looked up and there was a girl getting into the shower catty corner from me staring at me. All my sagging skin, fat, stretchmarks and all. You guys get the picture I'm sure. I was ticked off and said out loud as I turned my arse towards her..."I'm too sure!"
Now this little bit was all of about 5 feet tall...sorry Jen... and skinny. Looked like a runner. But that high that I was on from running turned to shame because of my icky, saggy, cellulited body. I was angry that I let her take that triumph from me.
When I got back to the locker room, I just dried off, dropped my towel and put on my bra and panties. I usually do that in the shower. But this morning, since I had an admirer, I decided to run around with the thunderthighs fully exposed so she could get a good look at them and I'm sure talk about me to all her friends. But you know what, I didn't care! For that split second, I was ashamed of my body when I caught her staring at me, but it didn't last long.
Because I know where I came from, and even though I will never be SMO again, I will still have sympathy for all of the girls who are still there and will be an advocate for them. I am so glad I realized that she couldn't take all of my accomplishments away from me. I am physically fit, I am not to far away from just being overweight (about 39 pounds) and I feel really good about myself.
Ladies, don't let anyone steal your thunder from you. Stand proud of your accomplishments. You have not taken the easy way out. You have altered your digestive tract because you know that's what it would take to do this successfully. You count your calories and protein grams daily. You exercise regularly. You offer hope and advice on this forum. You manage a crazy supplement schedule, and you also track your fluid intake daily. You have all accomplished much and will continue to climb even greater mountains as you move farther and farther away from your surgery date. YOU GUYS ARE ALL AWESOME!
Kathy
You give it to her show her how proud you are of the body you now have.
I hate it when people stare before i had the surgery 2 teen girls were looking at me and laughing and i walk over to them (my dh and boys were ready to run) and whispered keep drinking that soda and eating those chips and youll look like me someday...I couldnt let them go without saying something..
You handled yourself with pride Kathy.
You give it to her show her how proud you are of the body you now have.
I hate it when people stare before i had the surgery 2 teen girls were looking at me and laughing and i walk over to them (my dh and boys were ready to run) and whispered keep drinking that soda and eating those chips and youll look like me someday...I couldnt let them go without saying something..
You handled yourself with pride Kathy.
DS on 08/05/16
What a great post!!! Thank you for the reality check & the extra boost of pride.
*hugs*
Smilin'
*hugs*
Smilin'
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Revision band to DS. I had plastics to take care of my jiggily bits. I'm feeling so good!! My results have been even better than I ever dreamed.