Needing Some Encouragement and Advice

Hey all.  I haven't been around much here, more of a lurker, I guess.  I don't think I've ever posted to this forum before...but maybe I have.  I haven't been online much this summer because I've been really busy with work.  ANYWAY.  I need some encouragement and advice and my doctor, of all people, said to me "you used to check out OH and tell me how great it was!  Why don't you talk to them about all  this and see what they say?"  So here I am taking her advice and sending out a general I'M SO FED UP WITH ALL OF THIS CRAP SOS.  Grrr.

I'm frustrated because I've been jumping though hoops since February to have WLS surgery this year.  I've completed everything they have asked me to do:  6 months in a weight managment program, MMPI, psych eval, copeing sessions, EGD.  I thought I was finally at the point to get this surgery done.  But, no.  I just found out that It's going to be another 6 months because the surgeon is booking appointments that far out. So now I'm just looking at waiting, waiting, waiting. Which I'm ok with now that I've had time to process it all.  The part that really gets me is that they (the nurses at the WLS program) told me in February that there should be no reason I couldn't be done with this by the end of the year.  Now it's going into next year and another deductable year.  The surgery that was only going to cost me xxx amount for our yearly deductable amount is now doubled. 

There's nothing I can do...I know.  I just need someone to tell me it's worth it.  Right now I feel like throwing in the towel and cutting my losses.  Not good thinking, I know, after all the hard work I've put into this so far (I've completely cut out ice cream too, my usual coping mechanism so I'm trying a shiny new tool called TALK ABOUT IT instead). 

Sorry for ranting and whining.  I do feel better having vented, though. 

What surgery are you getting?  Are there other surgeons you would consider?  While you are close to the end of the year, and it may be impossible to get your surgery scheduled still in this calendar year, I personally would not have waited 6 months.

I'm having RNY because that is the only surgery my insurance will cover.  I originally wanted the Lap Band, but now that I know more, I'd probably go for RNY anyway (being my BMI is so high).  And, the surgeon I'm going with is the closest one to me that my insurance will cover (see the pattern?).  By closest I mean an hour and a half away in a different state.  Yay for small, rural USA living with no amenities.  I could pick another surgeon, but it would have to be someone about 3 hours away.   I've already waited 6 months.  To wait another 6 seems unbearable, but I don't have a choice.   

 Advocate - advocate - advocate!  Call weekly to find out if someone canceled their surgery and if so, you would like to take their slot!  Explain each time that you have a deductible that is met and you want the surgery in this calendar year.  It may do nothing for you, but at least you know you are still doing all you can to get this surgery for yourself.  And heck, they might get enough of your calling that they just put you on the schedule.  My theory - whatever works!

I've thought about that.  I do it all the time already when dealing with my lawyer...maybe it's time to bring out the zealot on the medical side of things!!  TOWANDA!

Many surgeons, in my experience, will work to get you in at the end of the year. I know my surgeon is VERY BUSY for the last 2 months for this very reason. Does he have partners in his business? Are they taking patients? I agree with Clirshu that you should bug them about putting you at the top of the list if people cancel. At least ask and explain your situation - it can't hurt.

I understand your frustration - I only had to wait about 3 months longer than I'd expected and I was miserable.

*hugs*

Part of the problem is they lost a doc at the beginning of the year and only just know replaced him, so they are really far behind due to the lag in coverage.  But I think I'm going to just start calling weekly and see what happens. 

I agree with the prior posters about being a zealous advocate for yourself, and to make every effort you can to get a surgery date this year. 

But if that does not work, I would encourage you to be patient and accept the fact that (1) you'll have to wait for a surgery date and (2) that it will cost you more money because you'll have to pay your full deductible again in 2009.  Even at twice the price, WLS is worth every penny, at least in my humble opinion. 

Sometimes things do not always work out exactly as we would like, but they do generally work out for the best in the long run.  I know it's hard to be patient, but focus on what you've already managed to accomplish and remember that reaching a goal can be that much more rewarding if we've really had to fight for it. 

Good luck on your continuing journey -

Kellie

Coming to grips with the timing of it all is half the battle.  Back in February I expected to be in surgery with in a couple months.  Boy, how that's changed!  Being patient isn't a strong suit of mine, but maybe that's why I'm being forced to wait!

You asked if it's worth the wait  - if you don't get scheduled until next year.  I can tell you that it is DEFINITELY worth the wait.  Don't get discouraged.  You have jumped through all the hoops and you wouldn't want to start over.

I am 6 months out, have lost 54% of my excess weight and 15.5 inches off my waist alone!  My surgeon told me at my 6 month follow-up that I was doing excellent.  I am so glad that I finally made the decision to have this surgery!!

Good luck and keep us updated.