Things you should not say to a WLS patient

I actually gained 115 lbs while I was living as a recluse so other than my family, doctors and one friend, no one saw me at my highest weight.  Now that I am down 115 lbs, I look the same as most people saw me before.  I had one comment recently though that really bothered me.  I have just joined a WLS support group and one of the members asked when I was going to have surgery.  When I told her I had had surgery 6 1/2 months ago, she said, "Well this surgery doesn't work for everyone".  Later I noticed she said many odd things at the meeting so I guess you just have to consider the source.  

Of all the nerve!  I'm pretty sure I'd have told her to not only F herself, but the horse she rode in on!  Kix

I think my response would have been "Well, I guess it doesn't make people any nicer either!" What a witch!

Wow, what a biznatch!

Hello, Jenn! I too am fed up with the backhanded compliments/insults. The WORST offender is a person I NEVER thought would totally try to sabotage me or make me feel bad about myself: MY SISTER who had surgery 2.5 years ago! She can be a total "biznatch" . . . The other day we went out to eat and she said, "Are you really using your tool by eating that?" Then she goes on to remind me that I should be down WAY more at this point because she had lost WAY more by the time she was 8 months out from surgery. I usually tell her to shut her friggin' pie-hole and try to be nice (because we're sisters and we can say that). But I REALLY don't appreciate it. The other day she acted all pissy and psuedo-jealous because I had gone down a size in my still-very-fat clothes while she has gone UP a size in the last couple of months. I got up in her face and told her that it was pathetic that SHE OF ALL PEOPLE should try to diss my accomplishment . . . She should be HAPPY for me and encouraging, like I am with her. I have done my best to be a cheerleader (although I must say I don't look anything like a sassy little high-school squad girl) during her rough patches ---- she has had to have her lapband unfilled a couple of times because of dehydration and reflux issues, which thankfully, I haven't experienced (yet!). Yet thru those tough times, I remind her that it's temporary, it won't last forever, even if she gains a few pounds, she needs to get well and she will be able to get a fill and lose again. And I remind her that she is down still about 165 lbs from her highest weight. But can she be happy for my measly weight-loss?! No. BEEE-OTCH. Well, that was my rant. :) Have a nice day everybody.

I just found this forum, I usually hang out on the RNY or the Main one.   I was reading this thread though, and I have decided that if anyone accuses me of "taking the easy way out", I am going to flash them my big ol' scar!!  LOL  I had to have my RNY open because it was a revision from a VBG.  Most of the people I know now don't know that I had the surgery before though(other than family).