Things you should not say to a WLS patient

The funny thing about all of this is that my Mother always calls me the emotional one! and whever i'm upset about something she says why are you always so emotional?  But honestly after reading all these posts I think i'm kinda strong! Alot of things don't bother me like they do most and I think its because I grew up with so many brothers and sisters........if one wasn't saying something disturbing another one was.......or maybe its forgiving because i dont get so mad at dummys I just shake my head...... I think it hurts me the same..........maybe i'm just so used to it?......I guess thats kinda sad when you think about it. I wouldnt want my kids to be used to it..... 

I have a bit of an advantage in that I'm not from Colorado.  When I moved here to live with my sister, I was so ill I was homebound and only went out of the house for medical reasons.  The only people I really knew other than my doctor and home health nurse were the neighbors, and then later on I met the folks at my WLS classes.  So, I haven't had any negative things said directly to me.  Of course, I was in such bad shape and am doing so well now, I can't imagine anyone would say rude stuff.  In fact, I get many complements from the seniors at the rec center, one of whom actually said she admired me!  Imagine that! I do get a few comments that can annoy, but aren't directly rude.  For example, the first time I went to aquacise, the teacher sidled up to me and asked me how much weight I had lost.  It's pretty obvious when you see me nearly naked that I was once extremely fat!  This happened a second time with another aquacise teacher, and once with a classmate. What I like are the folks who don't know I had WLS and talk about how WLS is the easy way out.  I was chatting with a senior couple at the casino recently.  The husband was on supplemental O2 and his wife was checking his sat levels.  I asked him how his levels were at this altitude, and mentioned I used to be on O2.  He asked how I was able to quit needing it, and I told him my breathing problems were weight-related.  His wife said, "That's obviously not a problem for you any more."  She then mentioned an acquaintance of hers who had WLS and how lazy she was not to lose weight "the real way."  I let it go, they meant no harm.  Easy?  In a pig's eye. I think if I had remained in California for my WLS and post-WLS life, I'd encounter more of the kinds of comments just like everyone else here.  There's a lot to be said for being anonymous! Kix PS:  Thinking about stupid comments took me back to my breakup with my high school boyfriend.  When I told her the news that I broke up with Tim, she actually said, "But he looked so good in a suit!"  If that was her sole criteria for choosing a man, no wonder she picked my dad.  A good looking asshat.  No, thanks! 

I'm not usually an over sensitive type, but if someone said to me that WLS was cheating or taking the easy way out I would have to look them directly in the eye and tell them I am going to forgive that comment because they are obviously ignorant to all that is involved in the decision and follow through , not the mention the risks and recovery of WLS. I would also have to make them aware that WLS is not a quick fix and all that is necessary to follow a nutritional balance and lifestyle changes. Most people who open their mouths without knowledge sound like morons anyway!  We are all stronger than stupidity....right?  HUGS  Jeanine

I've had comments from a so called friend, she was talking about how she wanted to loose 50 pounds "the easy way", (this is the friend I've known over 15 years and has never said a thing about my weight loss). I personally choose to ignore them, because I too sometimes think it was the easy way ... when before could I have ever lost 175 pounds in one year?  Anyway hubby doesn't see it that way at all, he turned to this friend of ours after she made the comment and said "Easy? You go on a liquid diet for 30 days, and then when you do start eating real food you throw up everyday for 3 months, and then you tell me how easy is that?" Needless to say this friend has never mentioned "the easy way out" again.

Hooray for your hubby!  I like that man!!  But seriously....you threw up every day for 3 months?  WHY????  What causes that?  Just curious.  Glad you are ok now.  HUGS  Jeanine

Wow Jeanine, if I only knew?  My best guess  - part of it was 2 strictures, part was learning to slow down when I ate and the biggest part was I have one grouchy pouchy! I shouldn't say every day but darn close. If we'd go out to eat before we made it home hubby was usually pulling over for me to throw-up. Soy sauce, startches and fats and my pouch do not get along! I still have queasy moments, but I haven't thrown up in a good 6-8 months now. I guess I'm finally learning? Honestly though I really do feel that for me all the complications I've had in the past 19 months were a good thing, they help keep me in check and the grouchy pouchy reminds me daily who's in charge. Life is so much for the better now.

Well thank goodness for that!  I am so impressed with your strength and all you have been through and you still have a positive attitude.   Part of me wishes my body would reject starches....geez..I better be careful what I wish for!  LOL  HUGS  Jeanine

Jan, the more I read about your husband, the more I want to know if he has any single brothers! Kix

He does have  a very good looking 40 year old younger brother - of course he has to have issues, he's living at home with his parents and tells people he moved back in to help take care of them  - NOT!  More like Mommy does everything for him from cooking to cleaning to making sure his bills get paid on time!   I love him to death but he so needs to grow up!

Hm, I'm pretty sure that's not the kind of brother I had in mind!     Thanks anyway! Kix