Wow, have I missed you all!

Hi everyone!! I have spent the last month or so trying not put my old computer, Bessie, out of her misery while I figured out what to get for a new computer. It simply would not load most pages anymore. I guess it was time to get out of the 90's with that ole thing. I am now up and running with my new system, and I have so much reading to catch up on. I see there are new folks on the board, and I can't wait to get to know them. I am still doing well, now at 134 lbs gone forever. My BMI is now under 40, but I don't know if that puts me into another obesity category or not. I have relaxed into the slow-down of loss now at 5 months out. I even got used to the new pattern, two weeks of 1-2 lbs, then the rest of the month 5-6 lbs a week. I am still trying not to worry that I have begun to feel hunger after not having had that since surgery. I also feel like my pouch now holds so much more, and I was really worried about that. But the surgeon had wanted me to be able to eat more, so I can maintain when I'm at goal. I also started using a computer site to log in my food every day. For so long I was  resistant to looking at anything other than Protein, because I was sure I would be a failure. Then one day I began to look at fat calories. After awhile I was just ready to do it all. It has really helped me start to re-train my overeating dysmorphia. I would have a day where I thought I had gorged myself, and begin the old "I'm a failure" thinking. But what I found out was that by logging my food I actually wasn't eating enough!! Now I am trying to relax into hunger=hunger. Not hunger always means poor coping skills. My next success will be when my head catches up with my new body. I can see it is different now, and I feel like a kid again. I haven't weighed this little for 20 years. But I still hesitate to do things thinking they will hurt, or I can't. I'm still afraid to get dressed, thinking the clothes won't fit. What's really confusing is when I put on something and find it is too big. I feel a similar discouragement as when things were too tight. I then have to change my thinking, and I don't understand why I do this. My biggest change yet, was joining a gym and finding out that I LOVE it!! I'll share more on that in another post. But I am stunned that I am even going. Now I'm off to read all of what I missed. It feels so safe to be able to connect with this group, I really missed you all. -Julie

Hi Julie Welcome back and glad you got your computer problems takin care of. When i couldnt get on for a few days i went through withdrawls. I cant wait to be where most of you are at. I get nervous about tomorrow and then read everyones post and realize its a new awaking and im almost there. look forward to talking with you on here.

Welcome back hon! It's good to hear you are doing well I totally agree about the logging your food each day, it has been huge in determining my behavior in relation to food. there are days when I think I haven't eaten anything and when I log it I'm shocked to see how much I have really eaten. And then there are days when I think I have eaten tons and it turns out it's not much at all. It really does help! And good for you for taking on the gym, that's a huge step! It certainly does make you feel better, doesn't it? Good to see you again sweety!

greetings julie!

welcome back...we missed you too!

deb

Julie, I'm glad you're back.  I thought it might have been something I said, such as: "Go Rockies!" Tee hee hee, Kix

Glad to have you back with us Julie!  Could you please share with us where you log your daily food intake?  Is it a free site?  I need to do that because I think there are many days that I don't eat enough. Knowledge is power, right? You have done a remarkable job and I enjoy hearing your thoughts and issues as I am right behind you at 3 months out, so it helps to know what to expect. Thanks!!!  HUGS  Jeanine

Hi Jeanine :) I use MyDailyPlate.com, but I know others use different sites. I think one is called Fitday. -Julie

I saw earlier where you posted that site so I checked it out today.  Thanks so much!  HUGS  Jeanine

Welcome back, Julie; we've missed you!  Sorry you had to put Bessie out to pasture - it's never easy to let an old friend go....   You are doing great!  Like PJ, I would encourage you to stick with the food journal.  I'm almost 28 months out now and have been journaling daily since about 6 months post-op.  I also track my weight every day; I needed that so I could help build a relationship in my head between how much I eat and how much I weigh.  The great thing for me at this point about journaling is that it's helping me figure out how many calories I need to maintain, how much I need to eat if I want to lose, how much my exercise routine affects my weight, etc.  I'm very data oriented, so the information about my daily calorie consumption helps me make good, ongoing decisions.  The other thing that's great is that I've learned I can eat about 2200-2500 calories a day, as long as I exercise a lot and want to maintain in the upper 180 range.  I want to get to the 170s, so am working on cutting my calories back to around 2000 calories a day.  At this point, I'm only losing 3-5 pounds/month, but I am still losing at 28 months out, and I honestly attribute that to daily weighing and food journaling! Anyway, I'm glad you are back online.  Enjoy reading all the posts and getting caught up!  Look forward to seeing more from you soon - Kellie

Julie - Welcome BACK! I've missed seeing you post. Life for me has been so incredibly busy and I can only pop in here quickly and run. I was so blessed to see you post that you were back. I just got a new computer as well, and the time it takes to transition everything is HUGE! Many of my personal files are still on the old one, I just haven't had the time to move them over yet. Thankfully, my old computer is still working, it is just in my daughters room. I had run out of hard disk space, and didn't have enough memory. The old one will work for her for sometime yet. Congrats on getting your BMI below 40! You are now just "obese" without any of the other words in front - no super or morbid or super morbid! YAY for you! Isn't it amazing to see how much fun exercise can be at this point? I love going to water aerobics, and really look forward to it each day. I hate it when I cannot exercise. Glad you are feeling similar about the gym. Keep up the good work - you've hit a milestone in realizing some of the mental aspects and that hunger = hunger, and that you need fuel, not that you are not coping and that emotions do not = time to eat. Again, welcome HOME!