Could You Come To My Party?

Hi Deb,  What is wrong with us? Why are we so eager to denigrate any accomplishment we make in our lives? I honestly wish I had the answer to that. I started out at 327. In my first 4 months I lost 86 pounds and no more. But I never exercised and I have that eat all i want thing going on too. When I got this surgery, I HONESTLY thought I would be like everyone else and weigh about 150 now. I guess I was pretty stupid. I know a lot of people have succeeded with the GBS. But I wish I heard more about the semi-successes. I can honestly say that without the surgery, I know I would be about 350-or 360 by now. So, I am a success in that one small respect. (BOY! it was sooooooooooooo hard to type that)  I'm not trying to blame the GBS or anyone else but myself for not losing more weight. It is what it is. Good luck Deb on your diet.............thanks for listening. willby

Hi, Move over in this pity boat, I need room.  OK, we meaning you, me and probably a million others out there are going to start .....fill in your date ( I chose tomorrow).  I am having only protein shakes, water, tuna, salmon and mushrooms.  I bought a beautiful piece of salmon that I am marinating so I will have it all week. My brief story, went up to at least 500 lbs., lost a job, lost 40 lbs. from stress (fear of living on the street really is major fear), got rehired for same company, failed at weigh****chers numerous times, have severe walking issues at 450 lbs. and 49+ year old.  Had a panniculectomy in the hopes that removal of the massive hanging pannus would improve my walking, went down to 400 lbs.  Still loads of knee pain, hardly walk, still working full time but that was about all.  Had GBS, lost 100 lbs in 8 weeks, stalled, stil lots of pain, found out the knees were a product of bone on bone, need new knees, have to weigh 250 max for replacement.  Have moderate lymphedma in leg and groin.  Lost 65 more lbs. and am at a complete standstill.  Need exercise, can't do it, surgeon (my earthly hero) going to repair hernia, have PS do another panni, on January 24.  Will put me 25 lbs. from knees.   Can eat sugar.  Was not a sugar fiend before, I now crave donuts, and chocolate chunk cookies.  Can eat them with no problem.  Also a shopping addict.  In up to my ears.   RESOLUTION;  This crap has to stop.  I AM IN CHARGE OF MY LIFE.  I LOST 200 LBS.   Now Willby, let's look at Hasdone...married and dealing with a situation that you have no control.  Not only is your best friend and major support system not going to be there you have to worry ...let's not go into the political thing. Child going to start a new family.   Hey can we now call you Granny willby or is it going to be Granny Willdo.   Outlaws living with you...OY VEY!!!!!!!!  Nuff said. Furry children...they provide sanity for me hope they do the same.   They probably call you Mommy can do anything. The gambling, you know you need to have a professional help you with that, but I bet you will get some answers about the eating addiction there also.  So call you Thrifty by...two birds for the price of one.  (Alright I mix up my cliques). I am right here with you.  So have your last sugar fix, try the pouch test for 5 days.  It will help get the carb monster off your back.  Exercise, it is an answer.  On the days that I take enough pain killers I move around a lot and boy do I feel better...until the pain killers where off. DO IT.  IT IS A NEW YEAR AND A NEW YEAR.  Please write me and let me know how you are doing or at least if you want to save a co pay. Love your sister in sugar, but not in failure cause you are not a failure Jeanne [email protected]

Jeanne,

 I wish you were my sister. In sugar, donuts, tuna..........hell, I dont care. I just want someone who can understand where I am in my life. Thank you for sparing me the co-pay.......I can use it to gamble. (LOL......but also sad)  Thank you for sharing your story with me. I appreciate it more than you can know. Just to know I'm not alone in this  means so much to me.

 

willby

You are not alone.  This is a damn hard journey.  Anyone who says we took the easy way out should get constipated.... Hang in there, you are going to make it. Jeanne

Hey Willby - I hope that you take the advice of previous posters and look for a new therapist.  Everyone needs a pity party now and again.  I don't have anything wise, insightful, or even funny to say but I hope that things start to work out for you.  I have no doubt that you can kick out your demons and get your life on track where you want it to be.  *hugs* Jenn

Hi Jenn,  Wisdom, insight, and humor be damned. Sometimes a girl just needs an ear and to know she's not alone. Thank you for that. willby

Hi Wilby, welcome back and so glad you came. I am not going to say OH WILBY because I understand as so many of us especially on the over 50 BMI board do. I want to tell you that I am an action oriented individual that is driven for solutions and closure-at least that is what they tell me at work. LOL. I tell you this so you can understand where the rest of my post is coming from. As others have said, I think your first order of business for the new year should be a change in therapists and you should choose one with a license to practice medicine so they can prescribe medications that can assist you through these rough times. Better living through chemistry!! And I agree with the poster that said you should chose one that is outcome oriented not working on why we are the way we are. I also wonder if there is an onbusman from your husband's military group that you can stay in contact with and perhaps volunteer to help others who may be going through this for the first time. It may get you out of the house once a week which sounds like it would be a good thing.

I have one child, a 23 year old son. I live in Maryland and he went to college in Missouri and is now a mining engineer in MN. As a matter of fact about an hour ago his plane touched down in Melbourne Australia where he is visiting a friend he graduated college with who is also a mining engineer.  Do I miss him? You bet I do but I promised myself I would never let him 'feel' that he could not try out his wings because he would be leaving me. (Something my mom made me feel) I am lucky that I have things around me that can fill me up. And it was hard work finding them, don't get me wrong. But you will be happy to know that exercise is NOT one of them.  So I would like to challenge you Wilby to actually give some time to yourself and figure out what it is YOU like to do. My guess is that you are doing so much for others that except for the enjoyment you get from your daughter there is nothing refilling you up. You have to find those things that will do that.  And once you do, with the therapists help you can transfer your time spent with gambling and throughing up to those things that you like.

I hope I haven't offended you. I wish you well in the coming year.

Thank you so much for the advice and thoughtfulness in answering my post. i appreciate it! willby

Hi Wilby,

I'm just a new girl here, a pre-op. I want to give you a big hug.

I also agree with everyone *****commends a new therapist. Meds are good too. I've had good  and bad therapists over the years. The best one was a counselor who gave me assignments - journaling, specific behavior changes and called it "homework". I can talk a good game, but talk ain't gonna fix me. Action is.

Inertia got me where I am.

Here's where I'm taking action this week (besides going swimming);

I've done some 12 step stuff before about relationships. I didn't like the OA meetings I went to, but I know the process works. Part of it is the fellowship, which I'm finding here. Part is having a place to be accountable. That's here too. But I need something more. I've been warned that as I move along this journey, lots of stuff is going to come up. I want to be ready for it.

I'm going to try an Al-Anon meeting this week. No, no one in my life is an alcoholic, but I'm tremendously co-dependent. I'm seeing that for me to put the tool of WLS to optimal use, I need to start to learn to take care of myself. I don't do that very well yet. 

What action are you taking this week? You already took a big step, in posting so honestly. Think about what else you can do.

Take what you like and leave the rest.

Another big hug.

Patty

 

Patty,  Thank you for taking the time to answer my post. It always helps to have another perspective on things. willby