Gobsmacked

I had an interesting weekend.  My HMO hosted a WLS reunion Saturday night for all the folks who have had bariatric surgery.  There were four folks that I knew from my pre-op classes (two of whom I see frequently) and one I know from the monthly support group meetings.  One classmate from the pre-op class didn't recognize me at all.  She said, "You were in my class?"  I said, "Yes, I'm the one that used to be in the wheelchair and on oxygen."  She nearly fell over from shock.  "OMG!  I remember you had to come to class in the handicapped van."  She went on and on about how great I looked (which was nice).  She has an extremely abrasive personality, though, so she wasn't well regarded by the other classmates.  I get along with just about everybody and even I can only take this particular person in very small doses.  Oh, I also won a door prize--a cute gym bag with a towel, water bottle, and pedometer/radio.  Woohoo!  Today, I went to one of those parties where you make cards with ink stamps and glitter.  A friend of mine hosted, and I was having a great time even though I am extremely craft-impaired.  At my craft table, we started chatting about last night's reunion and how abrasive so-and-so is.  My friend piped up, "This might sound rude, but so-and-so acts so loud and, you know, Jewish!"    Being a member of the tribe myself, I took umbrage at that remark and replied,  "Well, I'm Jewish, so I'm not sure what you mean."  She replied, "Well, you're loud, too."  I'm pretty sure that what she meant was that our classmate's personality was like the stereotype of the obnoxious New Yorker that we have all seen on movies and TV.  Even so, who says such a thing in this day and age?     I'm not particularly religious, so I'm not exactly sure why it rubbed me the wrong way, but it did.  It really put a damper on the rest of my day.  I think my friend knew she hurt my feelings, because she said she'd call me later. Hmph. Kix

That would have hurt my feelings, too.  I just can't imagine that people still say such things.  I live in an extremely diverse community - a great mix of races, religions, different types of "families," including mine which is comprised of three women, one of whom is African-American and two caucasians.  And thankfully we never hear those kind of comments in our community.  Of course, Cleveland has one of the largest Jewish populations outside New York, so perhaps people here are more aware....   Anyway, I'm sorry this happened to you, but please know that many, many, many people don't even think these things any more.  I long for the day when more people are enlightened... Kellie

I am also stunned when people say such stupid things.  Even if they think them, surely they should know better than to say them!  And sometimes, I'm just dumbfounded as to where it even comes from.   I used to go to an embrodery group but had to stop because of the anti-hispanic and black comments and jokes.  I don't which made it worse, the comments or the fact that these "nice" ladies never called  people out on it.  I told the owner of the shop who held it why I wouldn't be back and she just made a wimpy comment about it not usually being that bad.  Geez. Well, maybe if your friend does call, you can help her understand. Sally