Just a Question? Why is everyone's Profile private?
I am just wondering, why so many of the folks- well let me say it plain, why are so many of the black women's profiles private? Don't take this as an attack, I am a sista and I love to connect and learn and grow with the folks on this site of all colors but especially my sisters, but I noticed that when I come to this forum so many folks have private profiles, I was wondering should I block mine, or hide it? I had RNY 3++ years ago, and I still visit this site religously, for encouragment and inspiration as well as to meet and connect with folks with a similar situation, or plight...I know that so many of us struggle with some of the same issues and sometimes I just want to read the profile and see photos of the people that I come across and lots of times I find that the pages are blocked. Not that anyone should change for me, I was just wondering why, did something happen that made folks feel unsafe showing and sharing? I do understand that with all of the things going on in this world you can never be too safe but it was a question that I have been pondering or asking and I just tonight decided to put it out there.
While I can't speak for others, for me it is a matter of personal security. I do not want threads shared on other sites leading curious on lookers to my profile. Nor do I want every oh member knowing anything more than what I post. This site has frank discussions of medical information and very personal issues. My experience is simply not for public curiosity. Its all about me and whom I choose to share it with.
When I join any site I automatically set my details to private. Once I establish on line friendships, I may open my information to friends only. Friends have to pass my prsonal possible troll screening before I accept a friend request. I do not send friend requests unless I have interacted with someone enough to have some level of comfort. Nonetheless I have still unfriended scammers and ******** as well. I report all scammers but there is nothing to be done about ******** other than use my block button.
There are no guarantees with online interaction. Its the same as meeting a total stranger in a public place. However, my comfort level is to leave as little detail possible open to all of cyber space. The same goes when I chat with a stranger in public. We may ride the same bus each morning but I will not be volunteering personal details just because we are in the same place at the same time.
When I join any site I automatically set my details to private. Once I establish on line friendships, I may open my information to friends only. Friends have to pass my prsonal possible troll screening before I accept a friend request. I do not send friend requests unless I have interacted with someone enough to have some level of comfort. Nonetheless I have still unfriended scammers and ******** as well. I report all scammers but there is nothing to be done about ******** other than use my block button.
There are no guarantees with online interaction. Its the same as meeting a total stranger in a public place. However, my comfort level is to leave as little detail possible open to all of cyber space. The same goes when I chat with a stranger in public. We may ride the same bus each morning but I will not be volunteering personal details just because we are in the same place at the same time.
MSW Roux-En-Y Gastric Bypass: Eat sensibly & enjoy moderation
Links: Are you a compulsive eater? for help OA meets on-line Keep Coming Back, One Day At a Time Overeaters Anonymous
L
V'N MY RNY. WORKING FOR ME BECAUSE I WORK FOR IT.
MSW,
Thanks for your response, I completely understand where your coming from. You can never be too careful. I remember when I first visited this site there were so many stories and so much info being shared, I honestly did make my final decision to have WLS based on the info and support that I got from this site, don't get me wrong I thoroughly researched this surgery 1yr prior to having it.
I don't frequent any of the forums, but I have always stopped by BAF to see what my people were talking about, I made some"oh friends" here as well. I hope that the sharing that I do on this site might help someone in some way, as I was very much encouraged and inspired by the stories that were shared here on OH. Again, thanks for the response.
Tiki,
Thanks for your response, I completely understand where your coming from. You can never be too careful. I remember when I first visited this site there were so many stories and so much info being shared, I honestly did make my final decision to have WLS based on the info and support that I got from this site, don't get me wrong I thoroughly researched this surgery 1yr prior to having it.
I don't frequent any of the forums, but I have always stopped by BAF to see what my people were talking about, I made some"oh friends" here as well. I hope that the sharing that I do on this site might help someone in some way, as I was very much encouraged and inspired by the stories that were shared here on OH. Again, thanks for the response.
Tiki,
LEE
on 1/21/12 12:45 pm
on 1/21/12 12:45 pm
There was a time when we felt so safe in here that there was absolutely nothing we wouldn't share, but things just got to risky for most of us who did not want to share our personal life, pics, wls, struggles, etc.. and we went as we called it back then In-Cog-Negro. LOL
Salty Pickle a.k.a. Lee
LEE
on 1/21/12 12:40 pm, edited 1/21/12 12:43 pm
on 1/21/12 12:40 pm, edited 1/21/12 12:43 pm
I posted this on a thread earlier and it seemed to answer your question so here goes again.
In the hay day of BAF when there were hundreds of us on here daily and we talked and posted at such a fast pace that a thread was literally on the front page for 2 hours max. It was men and women, and we had fun talking about EVERYTHING.
Then Obesity Help put the share buttons on here and we all felt our privacy was threatened and BAF went into lock down. We all locked our accounts and blocked access to our pics or took them down altogether, most just left.
Then someone an old BAF'er decided that if you can't beat um, join um and set up a secret BAF group on Facebook and that is where you will find most of the old members that use to walk these hallow walls of BAF on OH.
But a few of us stuck around to try to hold on to our old abandoned home, and just recently there has been a bit more activity, I can't promise the buzz is long lasting but at least there is some posting going on.
In the hay day of BAF when there were hundreds of us on here daily and we talked and posted at such a fast pace that a thread was literally on the front page for 2 hours max. It was men and women, and we had fun talking about EVERYTHING.
Then Obesity Help put the share buttons on here and we all felt our privacy was threatened and BAF went into lock down. We all locked our accounts and blocked access to our pics or took them down altogether, most just left.
Then someone an old BAF'er decided that if you can't beat um, join um and set up a secret BAF group on Facebook and that is where you will find most of the old members that use to walk these hallow walls of BAF on OH.
But a few of us stuck around to try to hold on to our old abandoned home, and just recently there has been a bit more activity, I can't promise the buzz is long lasting but at least there is some posting going on.
Salty Pickle a.k.a. Lee
(deactivated member)
on 1/21/12 11:12 pm
on 1/21/12 11:12 pm
Security reasons sorry and to MSW and LEE ya when I first found out about BAF I lived on this site couldn't get enough was so hungry (lol) for knowledge comparing and sharing now things have changed so much it was so much fun but I'm making a comeback I have to stay focused and keep in touch this is the help I need and can't anyone understand but us!!!
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