Significant other after surgery

My significant other is not totally for my surgery but he understands that it is my decision.  He is for me losing the weight but not surgery.  My question is were your significant others still physically attracted to you after the surgery? I will be getting the surgery because I am comfortable with having some plastic surgery and I can deal with some lose skin.  Were there any problems that your significant other had with you post-op?

I had surgery in February 2010, met a great guy in March 2010. He loved everything about my body (I was 330 when we met).  I never told him that I had surgery because I really didn't think it was going to be anything more than something physical between us. He saw me working out, eating healthy, restricting the times that I eat. He always tried to feed me traditional dishes from his country - I would never really indulge.  Low and behold over a year later we are still together - BUT he is not physically attracted to me seriously. I have told him many times to just tell me how he feels and he has a free ticket to move on but he just won't let go. A part of him doesn't want me but he doesn't want another man to have me. I think he is in love with me "the person" and it doesn't hurt that the sex is AWESOME!!!! That is still not enough for me, so I have been giving him space and hopefully he will just say he is done.

I know that he likes large women and I feel that he is sleeping with someone else. But anywho, that doesn't bother me none, because I have been dating (not sleeping with) other people every since I felt his attraction to me dwindle. And at this point I feel like I am ready to really move on myself and be intimate with someone else.  Take it from he if he truly loves you the attraction will get stronger, if he doesn't then expect some trouble to arise. 

Peace and Blessings

I was married 18 years when I was banded.  Hubby was nervous because he didn't know what to expect.  How I would change physically, mentally, emotionally.  I've never given him one second to ever be threatened about our relationship, but he was still nervous.  He never complained about my weight pre wls and was always careful to be sensitive about my weight, but I knew that he didn't like it.  Also, I read several posts from vets that got divorced post wls after many years of marriage- these stories coupled with his nervousness made me nervous.

We just celebrated 20 years of marriage and we're happier now than pre wls.  I'm happier in my own skin (and in my new wardrobe).  I can tell that he likes to "show me off" because, like most of us, I like to dress and I look good.  I'm more social and just a happier person overall.  That made me better to come home to.  I'm not even going to get into the benefits of being more physically fit..  Either way, he's not nervous any more.

While not serously involved with anyone immediately before or after surgery, I have had romantic interests who knew me when.  None have changed their attitude towards me after weight loss.  Our relationships remain the same. 

I know that a long term committed relationships are very different.   However, someone who cares for you deeply looks past the outside.  They are not threatened by your weight loss and will care for you at any size.    Best wishes to you. 

While I was not married before or after WLS. My Mother had surgery and her and my dad make me sick with all that lovey dovey stuff ( just kidding) they're happy. My Brother and his Wife were married pre WLS w/ no kids and they now have 3 (I wished they'd slow down cuz I already have 10 nieces & nephews) and they're happy. I think it all depends on the strength of the relationship prior to WLS. If you have a strong bond and communication with your husband you should be fine. If yall are arguing about who didnt do this or that. Get counseling now to resolve your issues.

Thats my two cents.

Oh and if you think your man is cheating....get rid of his ass now. Why wait for him to leave you! He won't cuz he's getting the best of both worlds. Come on now! I speak from experience and wasted too much time.

Again just my two cents.

my relationships was rocky before and it got worse after the surgery, but i had to remind myself that there is a whole world out there!!! people have their preferances and men who like larger women may not be so willing to switch over which is what happened in my case, as long as you stay on the path that ultimately its your health and well being thats most important, keep the communication open, continue to support each other and hopefully everything else will fall in place...