Regain Blues

Woke up looked at the after, got depressed and pulled the pic.

Your lower body but your upper body looks the same. Thats amazing, how you do that?

My lower body in person looks huge to me.  I gained so much weight and I hate it, and no matter what I do I can't lose it.    But at least I don't look as fat in pictures as I do in real life.

I think it shows in my face too, big time.

It might be the way you're posed in the 2nd, but you look more 'boobalicious' in the 2nd pic, but the big difference is your hips. Not big as in "Damn! What happened to her?", but more curvy.

LOL,   Thanks Michelle

In person it is a Dam! What happened to her? 

I doubt it Lee.  You're a beautiful woman, and I suspect more than a little too hard on yourself.

Seriously I get that Dam she is fat look all the time, especially being with Becca who lost 260 pounds and maintains a 125 pounds.    Here is the senario

To Becca:   Wow!!!  you look great, you are so skinny
To me: Oh hi Lesia....... (look me up and down on the sly)  you look good too.
Me in my head:  FUCK YOU ***** 
Me later at home: 

Aww Lee.  People can be cruel sometimes, but ya gotta remember...
1)you work out like a fiend-you are going to be more dense cuz of your musculature
2)you're a sista!  Hips and ass are a part of the package

To be honest you've got the body type I'd love to have if ever I get to goal.

Okay..here comes the stern talking to that you need!!!  You need to understand what YOUR body looks like and stop comparing it to an "ideal" of what what you think you should look like that's floating around in your head!  You are not some tiny little boney girl....and Becca (per that persons comment) has been ill so of course she's soo thin.  Lee, you are not going to look like some boney white girl ( and no I don't mean Becca). You are curvy with thickness. You are muscular and firm. You are what most of us are working towards so..please sweetheart, see your body for what it is suppose to be not for some unrealistic picture. You are so beautiful, you really, really are. 

My head is messed up more than you will ever know.   I hate this weight gain. HATE IT.

I wish I would have stayed my ass home so I wouldn't have gotten al the stares and looks.  I could just read the look on the faces of the people that were thinking what the hell happened to her.


We were eating with some ladies that know both Becca and I had WLS so they asked Becca about surgery and then they look at me and say "You had the surgery too?"   the way they said it was so ******g humiliating, my head has been messed up ever since.

That's why I hate going places with this weight gain, or seeing people.