I need your opinion.....sorry, kinda long
I knew you all would come through with some thought-provoking answers...LOL
Thanks so much!
I'm not ready to settle down right away...I have to admit I'm enjoying myself waaaay too much! LOL
I also know that I can't change either one of them. I just wish I could take the good parts from them both and magically make the new product the man of my dreams. LMAO
I've been in the game too long to settle. Realistically, I know no one is perfect, it's a matter of what I'm willing to put up with.
I'm only making a decision as to which one I want to date exclusively. I don't want to lead either one on or string them along. This wouldn't be a problem if I were the type to date two guys at once, I just can't do it without feeling guilty. They both want commited relationships.
I'm going to really sit down and list the pros and cons of both before I decide whitch one I want to pursue. I'm definetly going to keep my options open. Even though I know no one is perfect, I do want to leave the door open for the guy (be it one of the above or someone else) who is as close to MY perfect as possible. I DESERVE IT!
Thanks so much!
I'm not ready to settle down right away...I have to admit I'm enjoying myself waaaay too much! LOL
I also know that I can't change either one of them. I just wish I could take the good parts from them both and magically make the new product the man of my dreams. LMAO
I've been in the game too long to settle. Realistically, I know no one is perfect, it's a matter of what I'm willing to put up with.
I'm only making a decision as to which one I want to date exclusively. I don't want to lead either one on or string them along. This wouldn't be a problem if I were the type to date two guys at once, I just can't do it without feeling guilty. They both want commited relationships.
I'm going to really sit down and list the pros and cons of both before I decide whitch one I want to pursue. I'm definetly going to keep my options open. Even though I know no one is perfect, I do want to leave the door open for the guy (be it one of the above or someone else) who is as close to MY perfect as possible. I DESERVE IT!
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. - Oprah Winfrey
Hey Kim,
JMHO...Why don't you just be honest with both of them and date them both? Why cant you date both of them without feeling guilty? If you continue to exclusively date either one of them, how are you going to find Mr. Right if both of them are not right for you?
Unfortunately you cannot combine both men together and make the perfect man. Because there is NO perfect man, only someone that is made perfectly for you. But, I will say this, if you are a praying/spiritual person, pray to God and ask God to lead you because HE will show you what you need to do. HE will never lead you wrong, just listen for the answer. It may not be what you want it to be, but it will be what is best for YOU!
Praying it all works out for you. I knew you were glowing for some reason;)
JMHO...Why don't you just be honest with both of them and date them both? Why cant you date both of them without feeling guilty? If you continue to exclusively date either one of them, how are you going to find Mr. Right if both of them are not right for you?
Unfortunately you cannot combine both men together and make the perfect man. Because there is NO perfect man, only someone that is made perfectly for you. But, I will say this, if you are a praying/spiritual person, pray to God and ask God to lead you because HE will show you what you need to do. HE will never lead you wrong, just listen for the answer. It may not be what you want it to be, but it will be what is best for YOU!
Praying it all works out for you. I knew you were glowing for some reason;)
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I knew you were glowing for some reason;)
LOL....very perceptive of you!
Both of them want committed relationships and I wouldn't be comfortable with myself kicking it with both. Plus, I'm a terrible liar and would certainly be caught. LOL
LOL....very perceptive of you!
Both of them want committed relationships and I wouldn't be comfortable with myself kicking it with both. Plus, I'm a terrible liar and would certainly be caught. LOL
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. - Oprah Winfrey
Guy #1 - If you're not ready to settle down, don't worry about his finances. Now, if he's leaning on you to pay his bills then I would run. I say keep having fun and let him know that it's only fun.
Guy #2 - He's telling you that he loves you? Sounds like some pillow talk to me. Love is a four letter word and so is ****that's exactly what I smell. But if he is sincere, I would take my time with him. Being with a workaholic sucks, but having fun is possible.
Guy #2 - He's telling you that he loves you? Sounds like some pillow talk to me. Love is a four letter word and so is ****that's exactly what I smell. But if he is sincere, I would take my time with him. Being with a workaholic sucks, but having fun is possible.
**Weight loss since June 08**
Dayum. That's deep!
Any man beyond mid thirties to early forties is what he is and you've got to take him as is. For better or worse.
Guy #1
Financial instability, can you handle that long term? If there is a future, you will be the bread winner and the financial backbone of the family. Are you willing to take that on? When you've imagined your future is that what you envisioned? No matter how he got there, his finances will be your burden should you ever marry. Moreover, it could even cost you your assets if the marriage does not make it untill death do us part.
How well do you hold your tonge? Will walking on egg shells work for you in the long run or will it drive a wedge between you? What irritates you now will infuriate you compounded over years and years.
Guy #2
You have history. You've known each other long but do you know each other intimately well? He's not one for the club so what is fun for the two of you? Theater, live music, museums, hiking, what do you enjoy together? Is a life of work and back home enough for you? As a pair, what's your thing? What could be your thing?
Financial security is huge. Lack of it kills more marriages than other issues. However, will work be the wedge between the two of you and true intimacy? What will it take to fall into that comfortable grove as a couple? Is he willing and able to maintain his professional life and find that sweet spot with you as well? Does marriage to someone familiar complete his perfect life picture or is it really about wanting you but not being sure you're ready to commit to him? If its about being with you he'll find that balance between life and fun and career.
Rather than what I think or what I would do, these are the questions I'd ask myself. I'm sure other questions will arise out of the answers. As you figure it out you can maintain your relationships with them both. Guy #2 knows you're involved and you're not stepping out on guy #1. Examine your feelings, communicate with each, see where each path could lead you.
Just my two cents. Now let me peek at everyone else's two cents.
Guy #1
Financial instability, can you handle that long term? If there is a future, you will be the bread winner and the financial backbone of the family. Are you willing to take that on? When you've imagined your future is that what you envisioned? No matter how he got there, his finances will be your burden should you ever marry. Moreover, it could even cost you your assets if the marriage does not make it untill death do us part.
How well do you hold your tonge? Will walking on egg shells work for you in the long run or will it drive a wedge between you? What irritates you now will infuriate you compounded over years and years.
Guy #2
You have history. You've known each other long but do you know each other intimately well? He's not one for the club so what is fun for the two of you? Theater, live music, museums, hiking, what do you enjoy together? Is a life of work and back home enough for you? As a pair, what's your thing? What could be your thing?
Financial security is huge. Lack of it kills more marriages than other issues. However, will work be the wedge between the two of you and true intimacy? What will it take to fall into that comfortable grove as a couple? Is he willing and able to maintain his professional life and find that sweet spot with you as well? Does marriage to someone familiar complete his perfect life picture or is it really about wanting you but not being sure you're ready to commit to him? If its about being with you he'll find that balance between life and fun and career.
Rather than what I think or what I would do, these are the questions I'd ask myself. I'm sure other questions will arise out of the answers. As you figure it out you can maintain your relationships with them both. Guy #2 knows you're involved and you're not stepping out on guy #1. Examine your feelings, communicate with each, see where each path could lead you.
Just my two cents. Now let me peek at everyone else's two cents.
MSW Roux-En-Y Gastric Bypass: Eat sensibly & enjoy moderation
Links: Are you a compulsive eater? for help OA meets on-line Keep Coming Back, One Day At a Time Overeaters Anonymous
L
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