5 years ago today!!! It's my surgiversary yall!!!!!
Today marks my 5 year surgiversary. Yes - 5 years. I can't believe it and I finally know what they mean when they say time flies........ it's been a remarkable journey and had you told me any of the things that I've experienced would happen - I would have cussed you out and called you a bald faced lie! LOL
As of this morning, I am 209 lbs. From my original starting weight of 386, that's 177lbs lost and KEPT off. However, this is the highest weight I've been back to - and I am NOT pleased. My physical activity has increased substantially in the recent months - so my size hasn't picked up. Mofos try to convince me it's muscle, but the fat girl in my head isn't believing it for ONE SECOND!!!!
At 386lbs, I couldn't walk half a flight of stairs without wanting to cry - running after my daughter was something I only daydreamed about. Today - this morning, in fact, - I ran.... RAN 2.3 miles in 31min. And while I was sweating like a ho in the front pew of Sunday church service, I wasn't winded. I can BREATHE easy and exercise. My knees don't hurt. My back doesn't give out on me after I mop the kitchen floor. I can walk into a store, go to the Misses section, grab a XL shirt and buy it WITHOUT trying it on because I KNOW it will fit.......
And I no longer build my life around food. No more rewarding myself with it - raise or promotion? I bought a big screen TV and treated myself to a diamond ring. My daughter has a 'win'? Time to hit the arcade or the park to run and celebrate. When I DO eat - I have a mini register of what choices I NEED to make and I CAN walk away from cake, cookies, pies and the bullshyt.... I KNOW I don't NEED them..........
Relationships are completely different for me now - I don't search for and long for love and in the midst of my longing, accept just any kind of treatment. I DEMAND respect and I WILL and DO walk away if it's not what I expect. I know my power and worth - I always DID know it, but I know now that I can stand alone and I will not be lonely. I know that being held emotional hostage isn't love, it isn't respect, it isn't worth fighting to change - and damn sure ain't worth fighting to keep.
Not much has been easy - but I can say it's all been worth every minute, every pain, every triumph, every heartache. When Maya Angelou wrote 'Wouldn't trade nothing for my journey now' - I know just what she meant. Even if I could, I wouldn't rework or rewrite a single minute - these last 5 years have been a lifetime within themselves - and a GREAT life at that.
Pics to come later today!!!!!
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
thanks lady!
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
Anyways, this is a continuous journey. Good luck along the way.
M