HOLD MY FEET TO THE FIRE! ACCOUNTABILITY WEDNESDAY

Accountability Mission: No Mercy and No Excuses

Its mid work week and day three of the week.  Where do you stand?  Tell the whole truth and be accountable.  

Its in your hands now.  If you're using your tool or preparing to receive your tool have you taken control of the situation?  If not, when do you plan on getting it together.  No mercy and no excuses.  Do what you need to do.    

...All are welcome, jump in at anytime.

For reference:
5 Day Pouch Test website http://www.5daypouchtest.com/plan/theplan.html
5 Day Pouch Test Instructions
http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/black_american/3995048/Hold-my-feet-to-the-fire-please-Accountability-Mision/
Protein Train Instructions http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/black_american/3993571/Protein-Train-Educate-me-please/#32309205
Wagon Plan Instructions
http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/black_american/3650242/The-Wagon-Plan-Get-back-on-the-wagon
Overeaters Anonymous
Online Meetings Around the Clock * Information on changing eating behavior
 

 I did too much snacking yesterday - I'm a grazer by nature and there was a lot going on at work - I tend to shovel snacks when it's like that. 

Just got out of the gym - I'm really happy with my 13min, 4.6mph interval today - that's what's up!!! LOL  I also did a full 2 miles.  I will definitely be able to get to 3.1 by Oct - hell, I'm really thinking about that 13mile half marathon in Nov..........

B-fast almost done, will get my vitamins in before I leave for work - focus for today, no snacking - more water!!!! 

I fell into the snacking myself yesterday.  Who knew raisins were evil, lol.  Keep doing it Ms#1MM.  That half marathon is yours.  

My eating has been pretty good....still having sweet cravings from time to time.  I'm trying to quit smoking (again, I quit for 11 years and started back 2 years ago during a stress full time while in school) I will make sure I have all healthy foods as I go through withdrawls.  I have an RX to help with quitting and it's only been 3 days but it is working.
 
I have been walking most days outside and on treadmill.

I realize that I have to post daily or at least visit OH daily to keep me accountable!  I have been slipping on my vitamins big time and I slip on other things when I don't stay on top of my game.  The journey must remain in the forefront of my mind in order to stay on top of things..........it has sunk in...... this part of my life will never be the same if I want to reach my goal and maintain my weight-loss I must be diligent on a daily basis.

I need big brother off my back so that I can spend more time on OH on a daily basis....I'm just saying :)

We all need something to keep us grounded.  Its OH for me too.   Even so I still manage to screw up the vits.  We both must fix this. 

You might need to find a sweets substitute while working on the cigarettes.  SF hard candy or sf flavored non dairy creamer in your coffee or desert teas with splenda or even a small protein bar. 

Settle in or skip it because this is a long one. 

I did not want to post this.  I thought about a generic friendly reminder to stick to the post op diet basics for good health or there are consequences.   I thought just keep your business to yourself, whose going to know?  I thought I can't lie to my BAF, even one of omission. 

It defeats the purpose of a support system.  Particularly cyber support where I'm already hiding behind a keyboard and hello kitty's face.   If I really don't want to put it out there you bet its because it needs to be owned up to.  Here goes. 

I'm angry at me    .  I'm embarrassed by myself    .    I talk a good bull**** game about sticking with the basics, but I live it half assed.  I really knew better, but I did not act on it so now I'm paying the price.  Its biting me in the half ass.  There is no one responsible but me. 

I got my labs and they are crap.  Not the full wls version just the short set you get for routine lab work.   Many of you know I'm a problem child so less than textbook lab results are to be expected.  NEVER NUTRITIONALLY.  That is within my control. 

Here is my list of clusterfkcu's, the short version.
Stick to the basics?  Oh yes, protein first.   I've had a hard time of that recently.  Over two weeks so that does not explain why my total protein is LOW.  Here's the explanation:  not enough protein.  I get my minimum using the formula my surgeon gave me.  However, I know that is not sufficient for me.  I need at least 100g a day.  I've been floating between minimum and 100g but not exceeding 100g very often.  Over time my respectable protein levels have tanked.  It took only six to eight weeks. 

That fast.  I was fine at the end of May.  I've been hit or miss on the daily scoop of protein.  Haven't vets shared emergency room experiences due to falling short on the protein?  Haven't I stated that my hair falls out when my protein slips?  Ignore the signs and the benefit of others' experiences.  Good idea or complete stupidity?  Feel free to judge me. 

People prone to low iron should take their iron.  Daily.  My iron can tank anytime regardless of supplements.  Its genetic.  I took supplements for years at increasing doses and still could not keep a respectable iron level.  This is not one of those times.  My iron was holding.  When I stopped using the bariatric iron it started to dip.  I switched to elemental iron and I'm doing fine.  I run out of iron, it takes a couple weeks to remember to pick some up.  This happens every forty five days or so because that's about whats in the bottle. 

A vet taught me that it takes ten days of supplements to recover from every day you skip.  How many days of iron do I need to make up for?  I have no idea.  What I do know is my iron has tanked. 

See asinine reason for missing iron stated previously.  As a result, calcium has tanked.  Calcium, even calcium citrate is inexpensive, available, and easy to take.   I had no issues with calcium.  I've been taking it for years, perhaps a decade and in fairly large doses.  Then I reduced my dose to the standard wls recommendation.  Was I not taking a higher quantity before mal absorption?  Was I doing just fine on what most would consider an overdose of calcium with levels being good and not high?  So why would a reasonably intelligent person cut back to the standard...  and miss doses as well? 

Pre op, for reasons unrelated to wls, I required higher calcium.  That has not changed.  So taking less than half despite mal absorption makes perfect nonsense. 

Third time is a charm or further proof of my own stupidity.  I will not go item by item because I'm sure this box only holds but so much data.  Multivitamin, see jackassian behavior towards iron and calcium.  Imagine what my full wls labs must look like?  


You get the picture I am sure.  The "standard" that matters is the one that works for you.  Intellectually I get it.  Why did I not follow through?  Know your body then actually DO what your body needs you to do. 

I monitor my muscle mass religiously and have managed to maintain within a few pounds pre op to goal.  So I endanger this by screwing up these last two months. 

I can come up with a litany of reasons for changes in my behavior.  I can make excuses for running out of supplements.  None of it matters.  We all know I could have chosen to do the right thing PERIOD. 

I've thought about going back to my surgeon's recommended bariatric formula.  And back to the additional supplements I was taking years pre op that I still need to take.  Aw hell,  why the fkcu not.  IT WORKED!!!  Who know it was possible to bend over, hold your own ankles, and fkcu yourself so thoroughly.  I need a smiley for this gesture. 

No advice just a  and a .  We can get through this stand strong and remember the  is a liar.  You keep so many of us motivated with your post for that I thank u!  Sending prayers and positive energy your way sista!!!

  Thanks luv. 

I need no advice.  I know exactly what I did wrong even as I was doing it.  I kept telling myself I'd make up for it too.  I just have to stop bull****ting and do it.  

I've got two extra bottles of mustard but not one spare bottle of supplements.  God forbid I should use yellow when I want dijon yet I'll go without supplements untill I find time to run to the store.     

  I don't know if it's just me, but the whole bend over and grip your ankles thing sounded a lil bit hawt for a sec...... LOL!!!!

yea - you know you f*ed up - so do me a favor and don't write another silioquy about your retardation - just get on the ball and stop acting like you're naturally thin, m'kay?

that is all.

Hot???   I guess pain equals pleasure, lol? 

I will not let this **** happen again.