The nerve of some people!

Well family I have to vent and I know you all will understand. I have what I consider 4 best friends. We all have been best of friends for at least 30 years or more. Two of them are very supportive of my decision to have WLS, the other two not so much. One of the unsupportive one saw me on my evening walk on Monday and called me when she thought I made it home. Ten seconds into the conversation she starts in on the WLS. She goes I just want to say that if you go and have that WLS, you are just wasting your time and money. You are not big enough for it you have already lost weight so I subjects that you keep doing what you are doing. I went into the whole spill again about why I’m having the surgery and that it’s my decision and that was final. Well she didn’t like it too much and rush me off the phone. Well yesterday I stopped by the other unsupportive friend house. She had out of town guests visiting, I never met these people but she has talked about them often. Any who, my friend was back in her bedroom and holler for me to come back there. Well when I step into her room the first thing she says to me was “Girl you have lost more weight since I saw you last." I knew then what was next. She goes on and said I don’t know why you are considering that surgery, just make sure that you have all your insurance paperwork handy because everybody I know that had that surgery are DEAD. Of course we get into a heated discussion and I’m not at her house 5 minutes yet. Well I started to leave and she is walking behind me still talking that smack. We get to were her friends are and she started telling them about my WLS and they all jump on her side. Now I’m completely PISSED OFF. How dare she tell those people my business I don’t know them? Now this friend was my high school math teacher and we became good friends over the years and she has been like a mom to me. I was pissed when it first happen now I’m hurt that she would actually react like that. I’m just going to have to feed her out of a long handle spoon. I have prayed about this surgery for over 8 years and if God hasn’t told me not to have it then nobody else will. I’m just sort of bomb right now but I will get over it and they will too.

Unfortunately there are many of us who have been through this exact same thing you are experiencing.   I know why people in my life didn't want me to have it because they didn't want me getting smaller than them,  I mean there were a few who actually were worried about my health, but I mean very few.

You made your decision, if your comfortable with it then do what's best for you.  It's your decision.

I suspect jealously coming from the teacher because she does have that sort of spirit sometimes.  You really find out who your true friends are when you try to improve your health and well being. 

Umm - this is going to be a bit harsh, but you know me, right?  good.

WHY is it that mofos think just cause some mofo been around they mofo'in azz for X amt of years THAT mofo gives a dayum about everything YO mofo'in azz cares about????

more to the point - how is it that you come to think that every mofo lingering round you is FOR you?  and now that these two mofos have shown their azz..... Imma start a betting pool on whether or not you try to persuade or think these mofos may change someday........ lemme ask you this - where were these lecturing azz hoes when you were packing on lbs... bet they ain't call you after seeing your fat azz mow down a buffet.......

lemme tell you - when I was going thru my decision and WLS - my own mother was totally against me - refused to even drive me to the hospital the morning of.  But from that I learned that NO mofo in LIFE is required to give a DAYUM......I'm like BB King.... nobody loves me but my mama......

BUT THAT BYTCH COULD BE LYING TOO.

so - fix your head that this is YOUR decision - and if it aint up for discussion - STOP ****** TALKING BOUT IT.

....that is all.

MM I didn't expect for you to come no other way. lol  You are so right.  I'm the fat friend with the pretty face that sit and watch purses while they dance.  I've made the decision to improve me and they can't handle it.  I actually haven't even brought it up to them or anyone else that knows lately.  They both started in on me.  I feel that it's no need to talk about it, I made my decision and that's it.  They and anyone else that don't like it can kick rocks and that includes family.

Yessiree....have had this happen...and all I can suggest is follow through with your decision to feed them out of a long handled spoon.  People that can't be supportive of your decision should be given very little information or opportunity to discuss it. Its a medically approved and necessary procedure for obese to morbidly obese people.  Tell them...would they rather come be by your side for this procedure or by  your side when your leg is amputated due to complications from diabetes or you are  resuscitated due to complications from sleep apnea...I am just talking about my preop conditions but you get the point. Get ready...unfortunatley it does not get better. I had to severe a twenty something year relationship due to jealously and my friend inability to be supportive but rather destructive.  Your true...die hard friends will be there...and you will know who they are through this trial. I will praying that you get comfort so that you can not let it ruin your day...week etc... 

Thanks MD, I now remember you writing about your friend.  I just didn't think that the teacher would get right down mad about it.  Well that's on her I guess I'm just a little disappointed in her that's all.

hahaha... Mack! You are so raw with it, I love it.
She right though. And so is Salty, some people just cant b happy 4 u bcus they too busy hattin. Do you mama and dont worry about what other ppl think or say. Fat, thin, ugly, pretty, rich or poor folks always gonna find something to run there mouth about.
Do what makes you happy, and dont allow ppl to get a reaction out of you.

 LMAO - you already know when I come with it..... I bring da PAIN!!!!!! hahahhahahha

Its common to loose people in your life when you improve yourself.   Hurtful, but they will be replaced with the right person for this stage of your life.  I was a relative "lite weight" pre op and had lost some weight in the preceeding years.  The "You'renot big enough for wls." comments were plentiful.

Just last week, a casual friend said to me I liked you better before you lost weight (referring strictly to my appearance).  Then she asked how I liked myself now (flat on both sides, lol).  Crazy to even think about. 

Did she really expect regrets?  My answer to her was my bp is no longer in the stroke range.  If I could have accomplish that in the nine years it took me to make a firm decision in favor of wls, I would not have needed rny. 

Let them stew in it.  Its not your problem and its closed to discussion.  Just leave them out of the mix and lean on your supportive friends.