OT - Diary of A Tired Black Man/ABC Nightline

Thoughts BAF???

Has anyone seen "Diary of A Tired Black Man"? Here's a clip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acKcDjiaAvk&feature=related

I watched it two weeks ago.  The acting was fair and it was filled with stereotypes. Speaking for *myself*, I will admit to being scarred from previous relationships and bringing "old baggage" into a new relationships. Yeah, men that I've dated have paid for the actions of others. 

I walked away feeling that it was exaggerated. I did identify with some of the complaints/issues/******y. I don't think *I* was that bad or that angry, but I'm sure some men will disagree. One stereo that irked me was:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cm3tDCqXP2E

Now flipping the script.....

ABC Nightline has a series on their site: Why Can't A Successful Black Woman Find A Man"

http://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/FaceOff/nightline-black-wome n-single-marriage/story?id=10424979

I've seen tidbits, but I plan on watching more later today.

Well as for the first clip, if a woman wants a man she'll either go for it or at the very least make herself available for approach. 
When a woman or anyone for that matter gives excuses such as, you're like a brother as to why you shouldn't be together then it's an excuse meant to spare the other persons feelings.
(so whom ever that guy was he should come to the realization that he was rejected and stop putting the blame on the women who he categorized as stupid who didn't want him.

As for the chick who's never been anywhere (apparently).  Unfortunately I've seen people act like that. lol

I am sooo bored with the constant propoganda on the topic. Truth be told successful white women are having a hard time finding eligible bachelors as well.... I can'****ch the clips right now but if they are about the fact that as a 'successful' black woman I am allegedly angry, loud, sexually inhibited and frustrated,  and bitter...i'll pass. 

I dont buy into the 'you will have a better chance of aliens to abduct your body at chuch before a black woman will ever get married"...... There are more eligible black men looking for good black women than they make it seem.

Some bruh's use those statistics to make a sister feel desperate. Sorry, it dont work on me! And of couse mainstream media outlets love to sensationalize anything that makes the demise of the black family a theme.

Sherri Shepherd (from The View) was a speaker on the Nightline piece. She had some very interesting things to say.

Taking out my bifocals to read...hee-hee 

so whom ever that guy was he should come to the realization that he was rejected and stop putting the blame on the women who he categorized as stupid who didn't want him.

Everyone has preferences. IMHO, if a person is trying to press up on someone that they *know* is into the opposite, why persist? Why set yourself up for a smackdown? 

Putting in my .02 worth in and preparing for a possible duck and cover move. lol


While the film is kinda stereotypical with bad acting, etc, how often do we see this story told thru the eyes of a black man?  For every one of these, we will see a dozen "Waiting to Exhales".  Now, don't get me wrong.  This ISN'T to say that there aren't dogs out there. This isn't to say there aren't those that take advantage of the so-called "eligible single black man shortage" and lose their damned minds, making it bad for those of us who are sincerce in our pursuit. 

In my opinion, part of it IS overhyped media sensationalism from movies, books, magazines, etc..another part does come from how some of us handle bad past experiences. 

The brother in the first clip talks about some women making bad choices.  I don't think that making bad choices is gender exclusive, but, yes, bad choices do come into play at times.  As someone who has more "sisters" and "good friends" than I care to count, I can understand the dude with the frustration regarding hearing, "I can't be with you..you're like my brother/best friend.."   Sometimes, I feel like the "best girlfriend who pees standing up..."  lol

I don't know if I'm going to bother watching Nightline tonight.  Nothing will be resolved, IMHO.  Just some fingerpointing, accusations, excuses, etc. as what normally happens in these conversations. 

My feeling is that we will get it together in loving, meaningful relationships when we learn to trust and be honest with each other; when we learn to make better choices and, when we realize its not always about what / who we want but more about what / who we NEED to enrich our lives, to compliment us and grow old gracefully with.  Then again, I could be wrong... :) 

*dropping the mic, exiting stage left back into lurk mode* 

Get yo' butt out of lurk mode...NOW!!! 

how often do we see this story told thru the eyes of a black man?

The POVs made me gasp. I now wonder how many categories do *I* fall into? 

I had a guy tell me that he knew he was a diamond in the rough, so boo to those that TRY to take advantage of the so-called "eligible single black man shortage" 

This whole topic has been jazzing in my head for some time.  I agree that it's overhyped but I'm still drawn in. If a sequel to "Waiting to Exhale" came out, I would certainly watch it. Hell, "Sex in the City 2" is coming out soon and I can't wait to see it. Black, white, red, blue...we can easily relate.

What's up, Wonka and D,

Speaking of making bad choices...
 
Steve Harvey used to say in his stand-up act that a woman really needs 4 men in her life (paraphrasing very briefly here - the supporter, the good looking guy, the Mandingo, and the gay friend) for specific and obvious reasons.  However, I think that we men also need 4 similar women like that in our lives as well.  Unfortunately for us black men, a lot of times we tend to look for and usually find - at first - all four of those women that we need in one woman.  We run all of our baggage, drama, issues, etc... by her and she soaks it up like a sponge.  Then we think that we've found that one woman out of a sea of billions and we snatch her off of the proverbial market, hoping to make her exclusive.  

                                                    Then life happens. 

Changes in job, money, status, et****ur and while she is off discussing and dealing with 'things' in regards to us, with one of the other 3 men in her circle, we're often stuck trying to now run stuff by our inept and cosmically stupid best male-friend, because the other 3 women that we need to talk to [her] is at war with our blacque azz.

My point:  We can't keep expecting that our woman is going to be all 4 of the needed women in our lives. 



*dropping the mic, exiting stage left back into lurk mode* 

so, the solution to the "dilenma" is to have four different women? lol  sometimes ONE can be a handful.  Four might make me wanna bang my head up against a wall. lol

Yep that's the solution.  Two important keys to remember here is to 1. Never sleep with any of the other 3 women in your circle and 2. keep the conversations with the other 3 women strictly within the lane of where they started out or YOU'LL BE SORRY!