Runaway breast at the thrift store!!
Okay, I only tell this humiliating story to bring you a laugh and a smile…
My church owns a thrift store. Because we are a very small church, we can’t afford at this time to hire staff for the store, so we are all volunteering shifts. About a month ago, I took my turn. The rule is that a woman can never be in the store alone or with just another woman. A man must be present with us at all times. The store is located along a strip of highway and in a plaza next to a semi- biker bar called “Hot as Hell". (Yes, God has a sense of humor) and just for our safety, our pastor wants a man present.
So there I was in the back, unpacking boxes with a very seasoned, mature, mighty man of God whom has been happily married going on 35 years and has three grown children,. He like I, was a New Yorker for many, many years and then moved to Arizona. He has lived all over the world, seen more things than you can imagine (wasn’t always saved) and has a VERY settled, quiet, and quite frankly, stern nature. Trust me, he rarely cracks a smile!
I was wearing a yellow tank top with a tight, body fitting spaghetti strapped tank underneath it with a pear of jeans. Along with the all the other "gear" I was wearing, I was locked and loaded…or so I thought.
“T" was sitting on top of a ladder and I was handing boxes of items up to him to put on top of a storage shelf. So I was bending and stooping and standing and reaching. Bending and stooping and standing and reaching…you get the idea.
I stood up and handed him the last item. With one hand on my hip and the other brushing hair out of my face, I looked at him. He BUSTED out laughing and looked away and said…
“Brenda"…. He couldn’t finish his sentence because he was laughing so hard!
“WHAT"??!!!!!! I said. T just kept laughing at me. I don’t think I have ever seen him laugh this hard at anything in the five years I have known him!!
“What?! What?! What?!" I insisted.
“Go to the ladies room" he said. Just as he said those words, I could feel that something just… wasn’t…. right…. Little did I know with all the motion, that one of my breasts had wiggled its way up and half way out of my bra!!! I looked RIDICULOUS!! Trust me, not sexy AT ALL. I looked like some deformed Picasso painting!!
T just stood there shaking his head and looking away. He was gracious and never said more than that! I covered up and ran to the ladies room. I was so embarrassed but had to laugh. When I came out, I tried to explain that since loosing all the weight, the girls just aren’t the same!!!! It’s like trying to hold a Jell-O mold in a hair net!!!!
Yep, there I was....in the thrift store...owned by my church...with a man I go to church with.....with my boob hanging out! Does it get more embarrassing??!!!
My church owns a thrift store. Because we are a very small church, we can’t afford at this time to hire staff for the store, so we are all volunteering shifts. About a month ago, I took my turn. The rule is that a woman can never be in the store alone or with just another woman. A man must be present with us at all times. The store is located along a strip of highway and in a plaza next to a semi- biker bar called “Hot as Hell". (Yes, God has a sense of humor) and just for our safety, our pastor wants a man present.
So there I was in the back, unpacking boxes with a very seasoned, mature, mighty man of God whom has been happily married going on 35 years and has three grown children,. He like I, was a New Yorker for many, many years and then moved to Arizona. He has lived all over the world, seen more things than you can imagine (wasn’t always saved) and has a VERY settled, quiet, and quite frankly, stern nature. Trust me, he rarely cracks a smile!
I was wearing a yellow tank top with a tight, body fitting spaghetti strapped tank underneath it with a pear of jeans. Along with the all the other "gear" I was wearing, I was locked and loaded…or so I thought.
“T" was sitting on top of a ladder and I was handing boxes of items up to him to put on top of a storage shelf. So I was bending and stooping and standing and reaching. Bending and stooping and standing and reaching…you get the idea.
I stood up and handed him the last item. With one hand on my hip and the other brushing hair out of my face, I looked at him. He BUSTED out laughing and looked away and said…
“Brenda"…. He couldn’t finish his sentence because he was laughing so hard!
“WHAT"??!!!!!! I said. T just kept laughing at me. I don’t think I have ever seen him laugh this hard at anything in the five years I have known him!!
“What?! What?! What?!" I insisted.
“Go to the ladies room" he said. Just as he said those words, I could feel that something just… wasn’t…. right…. Little did I know with all the motion, that one of my breasts had wiggled its way up and half way out of my bra!!! I looked RIDICULOUS!! Trust me, not sexy AT ALL. I looked like some deformed Picasso painting!!
T just stood there shaking his head and looking away. He was gracious and never said more than that! I covered up and ran to the ladies room. I was so embarrassed but had to laugh. When I came out, I tried to explain that since loosing all the weight, the girls just aren’t the same!!!! It’s like trying to hold a Jell-O mold in a hair net!!!!
Yep, there I was....in the thrift store...owned by my church...with a man I go to church with.....with my boob hanging out! Does it get more embarrassing??!!!
I refer to mine as foldable. They're too tiny to pop out of nything these days but you can scrunch then and accordial pleat them into any old shape. 
!!!!!
Heck, once I read the title and knew there'd be boobies in here - I had to come runnin!
See, he's good - he told you...... i would have left the painting on the wall a while longer.....I like to appreciate fine art
*Forrest Gump voice* Mama always said they's no such thang as bad tit-tays. They's little bitty ones, big ole round ones, bubbly ones, long ones, light ones, dark ones........ I like tit-tays......
See, he's good - he told you...... i would have left the painting on the wall a while longer.....I like to appreciate fine art
*Forrest Gump voice* Mama always said they's no such thang as bad tit-tays. They's little bitty ones, big ole round ones, bubbly ones, long ones, light ones, dark ones........ I like tit-tays......
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