I am hoping that she is not doing a switcharoo on me!

Hi BBS!

I know it has to do with my weight loss...I am the first one she calls whenever she has any issues..personal or otherwise. I am going to pray about it though and as others suggested...not discuss my weight loss with her anymore. I can see that its probably just make her take a hard look at herself more. I have been there so I can understand now that I think about it. I am glad I posted. I feel much better. Thanks so much for responding.

I have to disagree B, on that.

 

In ’08 when I had a TT and Mrs. Rhonda did – I got jacked up, she got great results.  And while I was happy for her (truly, cause that’s my DAWG) – I really couldn’t be happy in commentary or conversation because I was so upset about what happened to me.  I didn’t comment or support any others who had plastics and had good results either.  I was so upset about ME.

 

So, good friend or not – you can act that way sometimes.  Doesn’t mean you’re not a good friend, just means you can’t get past your failure to openly enjoy their success.

 

Petty?  Perhaps.  Childish?  Maybe.  Human?  DEFINITELY

 

jmo

That makes a lot of sense.  It's not so much that you're hating the other person and don't want them to be happy.  It's that it is overshadowed by the pain you're feeling for your own situation. 

I have a friend who's been trying for years to get pregnant.  She was recently telling me how hard it was for her to listen to a girl at work talking about her baby when she can't have one.

I agree w/  #1 MM.....just how people is.....been guilty of it myself no matter how 'nice' a person I think I am...human nature. Now people sabatoging you, thats a whole nother issue

Sometimes even after 20yrs you find that you have to cut some people loose.  When you notice that they are not happy for your success and are only there to push your head in the sand further when things are going bad that's when it's time.  It's not an easy thing to do but it makes for a more peaceful you.  Trust me.

Thanks Dreadz:

I really had to think hard about what you said. It made my heart sink to even think about giving up a 20 year friendship BUT you know what if it gets to the point where I am getting nothing but negative from her...then I might have to do just that. I am not going to write her off just yet but I thank you for your words because you never know...I might have to get myself mentally prepared to do it. Hugs.

You remind me how blessed I've been with the people around me.  Being one whoose quick to kick folks to the curb, I admire your patience in dealing with her. 

Keep the faith, she may come around after a little heart to heart.  Two decades is a lot to just put down.  The balls in her court, I know you won't let anyone detract from your success.    

Thanks MSW...yes I have called and I have left messages. I will wait a little while. If I have not heard from her...I will try again and then call her sister to make sure shes ok BUT if she is okay and I still have not heard from her...then she has some explaining to do...or I will be moving on. I am not even going to get to the point of letting myself get too upset over it. I just expect more of her..I mean she's not just some nicca I met on the street last week. In the meantime, i am going to try not to put to much more thought into it. 

Change is hard for everybody... Your doing the right thing to give her some space. Like Mac said when somone is struggling in a area and your doing well it's hard for them to give you a atta girl... And no I don't think she's "hatein" on you I just think when you guys talk you should be on to other subjects... Some folks can't see past where they are (w/ weight, money, job whatevea) to truly be happy for someone else...
Rea

Thanks Ladybug,

I agree. I am going to take everyone's advice...you all gave me something good to draw on. So for right now...I am going to put the focus back on me. Hugs.