SIstas, say it ain't so.....

I agree with 100% of what you said Tsunami.  I just recently got out of a relationship for the EXACT same reasons.  He called me the "whitest, black girl" he's ever known.  This is because I used words he weren't able to comprehend.  I didn't do it on purpose, but when you decide to go to college at the age of 32 and go straight through, part-time until the age of 43...then that's what happens-You're EXPOSED to new things.  I EARNED my Master's degree and REFUSE to limited my vocabulary just because he has a high school education-it never bothered me.  I never threw this fact up in his face.  I'm comfortable around his friends, he's not around mine.  He use to throw my education and accomplishments in my face too many times.  Never again-I have learned. 

Sigh! I can't believe I'm coming out of lurk mode again, but here I am again responding to another post about relationships. Here it goes... I think that this only touches the surface of what some of the single ladies here have been saying all along. When folks like Naomi (sorry to bring you into this Naomi) comment on the fact that there are no good men out there, this is only a part of what she's referring to. If you spend your time and energy (and money) getting an education, then HELL YES, you want someone who is equally yoked who is a good man. Otherwise, we are dating a bunch of really nice dummies.

Now, maybe we haven't done a good job of communicating what's going on out here with some of these men. Or maybe we've been communicating it but it gets lost in the slew of emails that go back and forth about relationships. I'm not sure how it's getting lost in translation, but it is. While folks responding to this email are saying "OH HELL NO", I don't think this comes as a surprise to any of us. While we may not be "dumbing it down", we all know or at least heard of a sister who's in a relationship with a dude and we just can't figure out the connection.

So, sadly, to answer your question, it has gotten this bad. Some sisters chose to "dumb it down" while others chose to either stay single or cross the racial divide and go outside the race to find someone that they are compatible with on many levels. Yes, we have many many obstacles to overcome, and dialogue is where it all starts!!!!

as i said before i concur with Nana's assessment of the dating situation... i just thought she left a few things out like mainly what she was bringing to the equation.. you're right part of the problem is the pool is too small but my question was and still is, "Nana what kinda bait you using on your hook?"  (sorry to drag you in also Nana!)

Aww, Damn! Naomi isn't here to defend herself. Lets not go there. But, to your point, we sisters do have to assess ourselves to make sure that we are coming correct. In my opinion, and this is just my opinion, the person in question in your original email could be a little lonely and just tired of being single if she will dumb herself down for a man. And bad people (not always men) can smell desperation a mile away, and will latch on to something that is way out of their league. I'm not saying that dude is a bad person, I'm just saying that in my experience, I know that bad people can smell desperation a mile away. We, men and women, have to be very careful about what we put out there. The good, the bad and the desperate.

perhaps..but don't block your blessing either..

Hey U... your worst enemy....did I hear you mention Nana...you know I still love you Donnie we go back way too far for me to hold grudges (I think you caught me at the wrong time when I was PMSing and you don't wanna make me mad during that time....by the way I love the new avatar.

I don't think I will touch on this subject you know erry thang I say up in this joint gets scrutinize and looked over with a fine tooth comb.

SAY IT AIN'T SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  

We have to stay on children not to dummy down for their peers and this is a grown A sister  ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh SAY IT AIN'T SO.

 Fake ******s not your intelligence (lol)

There is no way in hell that I would dumb down myself for anyone.

If they are not as equally intelligent as me then they would just have to learn to get caught up or bypass me.

I would think that she would want to help him with his grammar errors by being true to who she is.

I am not a fake person and do not understand doing anything fake for any reason.

I am real 24-7, 365.

If someone does not like it they can kiss the fattest part of my black country ass because I keep it 100%.

Why would she even want to do this?

Is the meat that good to lose her self respect?

LMAO, but smdh.

Just sayin

I hope she picks her self respect and self worth off the floor and dust it off and get back to her true self soon.

but to be fair to this brother, whose to say that because his grammar is off that his intelligence is lacking.. isn't there a big difference between being academically educated and having worldly intelligence.. what about the self educated men?  so is his lack of intelligence the issue here or is it his insecurities?

I would say that his insecuries are a bigger issue. His lack of book smarts is only an issue for the person he is dating. That is subject to be different from one woman to the next. I would personally have an issue with his lack of book smarts, but that's just me. The next sister might not have an issue with it.