Need Advice

I am in desperate need of advice.  I am now in the final stages of being approved for surgery and am getting cold feet.  I feel like my time is now or never, but am hestitant because I don't know if I am mentally prepared to handle the results.

Everyone is telling me that this will change my life forever and is painting this "happily ever after" scenario.  But what if I don't like the person I become?  What if I get the"big head" about myself?  What if I gain too much self esteem and turn into an awful person?  What if I become loose?

I guest what I'm asking is if anyone has any regrets about surgery, and is life REALLY that much better?  How do you keep yourself in check?  Any advice would be much appreciated.

Take a deep breath.. relax.. trust me on this,

Girl one thing I have learned in life is that you can not change "you". With that being said, if arrogance, big-headedness, or vanity are strong traits in you now, then those traits will still be in you after surgery. If you are humble, accepting and happy.. those traits will be in you as well.  Hell, deep inside of me was my inner voice.. I guess I was scared to release her ass but she came out after surgery. I used to be a people pleaser.. now I set healthy boundaries and dont let people cross me easily. With all that being said.. it's just to say this. This surgery is for the body not the mind.  If you have issues before surgery your ass will still have issues (you will just be in better health but still f*cked up ) If you were a mean evil super b*tch (you will still be a mean evil super b*tch, just a lighter one). Girl you dont have to check yourself for anything. Do you check youself now ? Yes, it's life changing but for better physical health. You will love a healthier you. If its the mental part thats got you apprehensive then get therapy in between to smoothe your transition.
 
As far as regrets. I will tell you one.. but it's my inner fat girl coming out. I am preggo with my first child and I have cravings. I want nothing more than a double fudged brownie served hot with 2 sccops of vanilla ice cream dipped in fudge or even just a Big Mac.. Girl I coudnt eat it if I tried.. I would be so sick.. but on the flip side. I am almost to my halfway point of my pregnancy (20 weeks) and have gained 3 lbs. (and yes the baby is healthy and so am I) I wonder if I didnt have WLS what the weight gain would have been or would I have even been able to get preggo. You will be fine sugar pie! I promise!
Hugs ,
Jazz

So very well put!!!!

Weight Loss Surgery (WLS) is 10% physical and 90% mental. My best advice to you would be to get your mind together because it will play tricks on you.  Just because you have WLS doesn't mean you will "live happily ever after."  Actually quite often having the surgery creates transfer addictions (alcoholism, shopping addictions etc).  My life has been "enhanced" by having the surgery and  I am now more confident than before.  However, the inner fat girl speaks to me daily and I still struggle with self-confidence and/or self-esteem issues.  I don't have any regrets for having the surgery. I believe it was the best decision that I ever made for myself.  My advice to you would be to go to your doctor with your concerns and he/she may refer you to another doctor who can assist you with your concerns.  Good luck to you and be blessed.

Surgery will not change who you are.  If you were not conceited and morrally loose before wls, you will not likely become so afterwards. 

The changes people make post op are by their own choices.  They choose not to address deeper issues that manifested in obesity thereby developing a transfer addiction.  They choose to behave differently because they believe that now they can.  Fear of the weight is no longer an impediment.  That side of them has always been waiting to come out. 

Most of us fat or thin fight a set of personal demons.  Post op you will have to exclude eating as a way to placate your demons.  Instead of eating I am fixated on planning my diet, exercise, and wl and posting about it.  I have found another outlet. 

You will find another outlet and you will be the type of person you choose to be.  Slender people are not inherently bad.  Just as for others, you will decide to express your new lifestyle positively or negatively. 

Your life is a series of changes strung together.  Consider this another pearl in the strand (Oooh how cheesy, did that really come from me?).  Should you give up on something positive because you may later choose to react negatively?  What other good things in life have you rejected because it may make you imperfect?  Perhaps this is one of your demons and wls is a step in overcomming it?

Be guided by logic not fear.  Good luck with your decision.