OT - Would You Take in Someone's Child?

Okay, so I have a lot on my mind...

My stepdaughter left home (she's 18 with a baby) last month because she got tired of following rules. You know, simple shiott...picking up shiotty diapers, dirty bottles, dirty clothes, and so on. I love a CLEAN home and so does her Dad. It's like a switch went off in her head and she figured that my addition to the home equated Hazel moving in. NOT!!!

She now lives with her friend's family (about 50 miles away) and she's refuses to come back home. She's legally an adult and the law is on her side. I think she's going to see that life isn't greener on the other side and she'll eventually come back.

This morning I received a call from her friend who also left home. Her mother refuses to sign over her transcripts so that she transfer out of her present school so that she can attend school where she currently lives....whew...long sentence. So the girl is now calling wanting to move in with me  so that she can stay in her current district and graduate next year.

I called her Moms and she told me that her daughter needs to be out so that she can understand that nothing good is out in the streets. BTW....the police has been involved because the girl has made numerous death threats to the family. So of course, she will not be a guest in my home.

So the question is, if someone was exhibiting tough love, would you try to help the child out?

I would take some ones child in... if the situation was a diferent. If a chikd left their parents home because they just didnt want to folow rules, then I would let them see the tough road of life and what it takes to be an adukt and live on your own. However, if a child left home due to abuse, or neglect and they just needed some one to care for them and love them. I would have no problem allowing them to stay at my house. especially if its because they want to stay in school and do good. The only problem with that is, that their parents may not always like some one else stepping. Your heart wil lead you to do the right thing, just listen to it  =)

Ninie,

You read my mind about abuse and neglect. Her stepfather has stepped in and replaced her father. I'm an outsider looking in so I'm not sure who to believe. The child tells me that her mother picked the husband over her. The mother tells me that the child refuses to listen to anything that she is told.

I tried to get info from the girl that would imply any type of abuse. She just flatly states that her parents are too bossy. WTH??? I told her at her age (and even today) I used four phrases:

"Yes sir."
"No sir."
"Yes Ma'am."
"No Ma'am."

I just don't understand young folks anymore.
 

No.  Not with a problem child. 

If her mom won't release her school records I assume she is under age.  She can go to child welfare to get back into school if she is determined to graduate. 

Mom put her out for a reason.  I'm know she has her side to this but the bottom line is parents house, parents rules.  She wants the roof over her head then she knows what she needs to do to get back home.  Its doubtful she will respect anyone elses rules any better.  

She's choosing to  grow up the hard way.  I would steer her towards public resources and let her find her way.  Those are the consequences of her decisions. 

Yea, I totally agree with if a kid dont follow their parents rules... they may not follow an other adukts rules. If she is under 18 and is not emancipated, then child services wont step in because the parents are still legally responsible for her. Unless they give up their rights as parents, or there is some form of abuse is when they get involved.
Children just dont understand that the leasons adults give them is for their own good. Im only 26 yrs old and I still bump heads with my mom, and all though I dont always like what she tells me. I know its for my own good ( I dont express that to her of course lol) but Im greatful that she cares enough to tell me when Im being dumb, because there is some parents who let there kids act like wild banchies.

Hell No,  if that moma is tryng to teach that girl a liesson about being in the streets leave her ass in the streets.

When my little brother lost his dam mind and started acting a fool we went to those tough love workshops that were popular back then and I listened while my moma on the other hand was to much of a bleeding heart.   His ass wanted to go and sneak out and then sneak back in the house. 

Well I waited for him to sneak out and locked his ass out and good.   He comes back around 3 in the dam morning and my mom is like let him in it's cold outside and I said oh hell no he wants to sneak out let him stay out.  So he sits on the porch calling ma, ma, ma, and it's killing my mom cause she is so worried that he is cold.   I opened the window threw a blanket out to his ass and slamed the window shut. 

The next morning we find he slept in the shed and he was so ******g dumb he lit the barbeque grill.   He could have freaking killed him self with carbon dioxide.  That just went to show just how stupid he was.  

Young people think they are so dam smart and you can't tell them ****  they have to learn the hard lessons the hard way.   JMHO

If there was some type of abuse in the home, I would help them get connected with the appropriate social services, but honestly I can't see myself taking in another child.  I'm already taking care of two now and they're more than enough to keep me busy.
 
Otherwise, I would not intefere with the parents' disciplining.  Sometimes kids need to get bumped upside the head before they learn that the world does not revolve around them. 

No, not if the child is being taught a lesson.  This is where,"it take a community to raise a child," kicks in.

Coolbreeze

 I agree with you there, Dude.  We need more of that sort of thinking these days.

I have to agree with the majority, with no signs of neglect or abuse, I would defer to the mother and if she thinks this is the lesson her child needs to learn...well she knows her child for better or worse, so too bad.  The girl will learn that a hard head makes for a soft a$$.