Foster parenting
I see it two ways one as having actually lived with my then boyfriend who is now my ex husband who actually had 2 foster teenageers. I would say that we were pretty blessed to have the two we did we didnt have too many problems. My ex was more motivated for the money and sort of let them do and go wherever they wanted to go.
Now I actually work for the department of children and family services I am a nurse there so no i dont see or hear all the cases but a lot of times its not what its cracked up to be. You have to remember these children have been up rooted from whatever they may call normal to your home wihich is unfamiliar to them and strange. Depending on how you obtain the children you will most likely be responsible for lots of appts, doctor, therapy court dates possible visitation with parents, etc. I know every state and possible county is different like I am her in Los Angeles County and the goal is to find children a permenante home so if its younger children you are looking to get here you have to be a foster adopt home a home that is willing to adopt the children if reunification fails for the parents and there is no willing family available.
So just look into it ask questions cause these kids have seen and been through alot and we often think I will just get them to my nice loving home and they will be alright and that isnt the case.
Lee I am very sorry to hear that happened to you I am not sure what part of California you live in but I am wondering if it was ever reported cause children are removed immediately when molestation allegations are made against afoster parent. Again I am very sorry to hear that and I hope that you healing from that awful experience.
Now I actually work for the department of children and family services I am a nurse there so no i dont see or hear all the cases but a lot of times its not what its cracked up to be. You have to remember these children have been up rooted from whatever they may call normal to your home wihich is unfamiliar to them and strange. Depending on how you obtain the children you will most likely be responsible for lots of appts, doctor, therapy court dates possible visitation with parents, etc. I know every state and possible county is different like I am her in Los Angeles County and the goal is to find children a permenante home so if its younger children you are looking to get here you have to be a foster adopt home a home that is willing to adopt the children if reunification fails for the parents and there is no willing family available.
So just look into it ask questions cause these kids have seen and been through alot and we often think I will just get them to my nice loving home and they will be alright and that isnt the case.
Lee I am very sorry to hear that happened to you I am not sure what part of California you live in but I am wondering if it was ever reported cause children are removed immediately when molestation allegations are made against afoster parent. Again I am very sorry to hear that and I hope that you healing from that awful experience.
" Depending on how you obtain the children you will most likely be responsible for lots of appts, doctor, therapy court dates possible visitation with parents,"
Hi Soon,
you make a very good point that I forgot to mention.
13 yrs ago when I began fostering, here in Michigan you could NOT be a foster parent UNLESS you worked, or was on Social Security Disability. (Not sure about now). It was very difficult for me to arrange appt.s, visitation, and other necessary tasks around my work schedule and homelife. This is one reason why I fostered only newborn-five. My oldest that I fostered was 2. Now that I no longer work, I will be more flexible.
I also forgot to mention (this is for Kenya) The liscensing process.
You will go to meetings, have homestudies, background checks for all 50 states, character reports, etc. Everything is step by step so not too stressful but it does take a while because training will also occur and will continue even after liscensing. During this time, it would be a good idea to get with other FP's and start getting things together and set up in your home. Other FP's gave me that advise because more often than not a child will arrive on the day that your liscense become valid. A newborn girl (the only girl that I fostered) was born a week before I was valid and held at the hospital until the day that I could pick her up...I was a nervous mess
.
Hi Soon,
you make a very good point that I forgot to mention.
13 yrs ago when I began fostering, here in Michigan you could NOT be a foster parent UNLESS you worked, or was on Social Security Disability. (Not sure about now). It was very difficult for me to arrange appt.s, visitation, and other necessary tasks around my work schedule and homelife. This is one reason why I fostered only newborn-five. My oldest that I fostered was 2. Now that I no longer work, I will be more flexible.
I also forgot to mention (this is for Kenya) The liscensing process.
You will go to meetings, have homestudies, background checks for all 50 states, character reports, etc. Everything is step by step so not too stressful but it does take a while because training will also occur and will continue even after liscensing. During this time, it would be a good idea to get with other FP's and start getting things together and set up in your home. Other FP's gave me that advise because more often than not a child will arrive on the day that your liscense become valid. A newborn girl (the only girl that I fostered) was born a week before I was valid and held at the hospital until the day that I could pick her up...I was a nervous mess
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LEE
on 9/11/09 7:46 am
on 9/11/09 7:46 am
It was New York (I am a California transplant)
It wasn't reported because I was threatened and so I never told anyone. My mom was never made aware that I was having trouble.
It was ridiculous that they put all my sisters in a home together and put me in a home with another family. I still to this day do not understand why they seperated us,
It wasn't reported because I was threatened and so I never told anyone. My mom was never made aware that I was having trouble.
It was ridiculous that they put all my sisters in a home together and put me in a home with another family. I still to this day do not understand why they seperated us,
Salty Pickle a.k.a. Lee
Lee
Most states have a limit on the number of kids you can have in your home at one time. My state has a limit of 6 but they will do a waiver for special cir****tances. Also people can set specific age ranges so that may play a factor in splitting up siblings too. We have been called for sibling groups before and would have taken them if our home was empty but having kids in the home it just wouldn't work for us. Plus you have to have enough beds for all the kids. Not enough beds = no spot for all the kids. Considering you had 7 sisters I'm surprised they were able to place all of them together. The smart thing would have been to place at least one or two siblings with you so you weren't alone. I'm not a fan of splitting kids up if there is space for all of them. We refused a placement because they wouldn't give us her sibling. There were two little girls 1 and 2 years old and living in separate foster homes and both were available for adoption. The foster family who had the 2 year old refused to give her up and didn't want her younger sister. We said we'd take both or none... we were not going to help split up the kids.
Most states have a limit on the number of kids you can have in your home at one time. My state has a limit of 6 but they will do a waiver for special cir****tances. Also people can set specific age ranges so that may play a factor in splitting up siblings too. We have been called for sibling groups before and would have taken them if our home was empty but having kids in the home it just wouldn't work for us. Plus you have to have enough beds for all the kids. Not enough beds = no spot for all the kids. Considering you had 7 sisters I'm surprised they were able to place all of them together. The smart thing would have been to place at least one or two siblings with you so you weren't alone. I'm not a fan of splitting kids up if there is space for all of them. We refused a placement because they wouldn't give us her sibling. There were two little girls 1 and 2 years old and living in separate foster homes and both were available for adoption. The foster family who had the 2 year old refused to give her up and didn't want her younger sister. We said we'd take both or none... we were not going to help split up the kids.
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