Sometimes I wish my mama would just shut the **** up.......

Yep - it's a mama rant. 

First and foremost - please - don't nobody tell me to be happy I got a mama to be mad at or some ish like that - if you ain't read all the ish I done talked about you have no CLUE where I am coming from - and sayin that ish ****** me smooth off. 

With that cleared up -

I was over at mom's on Sunday for the holiday hang out and chill.  I just switched beauticians two weeks ago - the new chick got my cut down COLD - I'M very happy with it - it's shorter than what I started out with (and actually how I really wanted it), but I can maintain it with NO problem - the first cut was still long enough to have me tying it down and molding it damn near everyday..... ANYWAY

Sunday was my mom's first time seeing the new cut - mind you, when she saw the first one - her first words were "I don't like it - I never like styles that are flat on the sides - you should have the same amount of hair all around your head" - Bytch - that sounds like a dayum AFRO!!!  who wears that these days??  Get your head outta the 60's!!! 

So - as soon as she peeps the new do' - I see that ish on her dayum face.  I snapped.  "Gon say you hate it and get this ish over with - cause I ain't got time for your drawn out commentary"

She went passive agressive on me and flipped the script -   "I wasn't going to say anything!  - It's your hair......"

Whatever man.  Then she tells me to look in the bag of stuff she had on the table for me - it's got a card in it - I'm thinkin "Happy Labor Day card?  huh"  I open and read it - it's some mushy 'I'm proud and glad to have such a great daughter' 

  fe-fi-fo-fum....... I smell a set up..........

I'll keep yall posted.    I ain't buying the 'love you, proud of you' all unprovoked shiot.  Been playin this game too long...... somethin's brewing.......

I will be sitting here waiting to see what's up...LOL @ disclaimers!

that better be a 100 cal pack of popcorn - don't be grazing over there and blame it on me!!

and hecky yea I put the disclaimer - too many folk KEPT tryna tell me to be happy about her... WHATEVER MAN!!!!

LOL

Flash back and post traumatic stress disorder! 

I know I will be flamed for this one but Im going to say it anyway.  My life is less stressful without dealing with mom day to day, God rest her soul.  Its not about love because I love her unconditiontally.  Yet while she was here, there was always a way to push my buttons.  Try to side step and there would just be another issue. 

Mom knows you from the begining and can always invent new ways to work your nerves.   I'm sure my daughter will be saying the same about me one day too. 

Trina, I swear, everytime I read one of your "My mama drives me to drink" stories, I think:

 lol

you stoopid cole!!! 

"What did you do to your hair, you big dummmeh?"

"Ma, i was just doing something different..."

"Oh, Lawd...I'm coming to join ya (clutching the heart)..I'll be the one with the bottle of ripple and a toothbrush....!" 

OK ~ now I've read plenty of your mama rants but wondering if you think she's turning over a new leaf? Brewing? So do you think she wants something from you or wants you to do something? That's how my Mom gets me..................she'll say..............now your the oldest so..........

a new leaf??  HEYYLLLL to the NAAWWWWW  Bobby!!!!

she 67 - ain't no new leaves to be turned till they dig her damn grave!!!!!

She has set me up in the past - be all nice and shiot then when I let my guard down.... WHAMMOOO!!! 

There's something to it - I just ain't put my fanga on it yet......

I'm only laughing cause I feel ya.