Did Jesus wear a stopwatch?

Ayy yo,

Like you out there, I love de Lawd!  Yes I do. 

But...

Don't get me to cussin over here about these flippin emails that people send me 'religiously" day in and day out trying to punk me that "Jesus wants me to know, yadda, yadda, yadda... now send this same message to 10 of my friends in the next 20 seconds - IF you truly love the Lord..." 

C'mon yo, I got thangs to do, Nucca, that don't require me timing my email transmissions hoping to stay in God's good graces - like he's wearing a stopwatch and shooting a starters pistol.  Isn't that why we go to church to avoid all that?  Look, I love the Daily Devotional lady when she posts on BAF and gives me the daily word.  That's cool.  It's clear and concise and nobody gets hurt.  But if another mawfuggah sends me some ole bull-drop email gaw-bidge about how Jesus wants me to "...past on this same email on in the next 20 seconds...",  I'mma...  Oooooh... (Breathe, Ninja...  Breathe.)   What would Jesus do?  What would Jesus do?  I don't know but I guess I'll find out in the next 20 seconds. 

Holla atcha boy!

LOL, you killin me, funny but soooooo true

I always say Jesus wouldn't want me to waste my time on these types of emails because he knows where he and I stand with each other and I don't need to prove to anyone where my relationship is with Jesus.  Can I get an Amen Double_Ayy?

I'll see your Amen and raise you a Hallelujah!

You know...and BEYOND the damn emails...don't forget about the texts messages too

Come on now....there will be no angel with a checklist of who did and did NOT forward them mugs

Yeah...I'm with you on this one

Yeah I don't even play dat **** with the text.  If you gonna waste your friggin time texting me that God said this, or an Angel will do that, then lose my dayum cell phone number and hit me up in da streets where I can punch you in the face for bringing me that foolishness. 

So true.  And they try to run that guilt trip on you too.  Talkin bout if you don't forward to 10 people then you must not love the LORD.  Please!!!!

Good One Bro. 

I know right. 

How they gonna try and punk you into being a true believer. 

  Now that should be a Sunday sermon! 

Whenever I see fwd from certain people I just hit delete.  I need to scroll down and hit delete once I know its a chain letter too. 

But that's what gets me right there too.  The very same people send them out to me repeatedly and they know I got a NASTY dirty mouth/mind when I really get going.   Maybe they are trying to send me some ORBIT chewing gum through the email.

Fugg dat.  Save a piece for yourself, Ninja.  I heard ya cussin too.