Who did you TELL?

When you decided to have ur WLS who did you tell?

I just made my initial contact witha surgeon today, I'm just waiting for a call back to schedule an appt.

Well I haven't shared with many ppl.. bc I'm not with the negative talk about WHAT I should do. I have told my husband, my sister, and a select amt of friends (5). I will not tell my mom bc she has alwasy been negative about anything to do with my weight..she is the reason I had really bad self esteem problems as a child and she still says lil comments about my weight. I'm just not ready to share my decision with her as of yet..and if I tell my other sister I might as well tell my mom.. looose lips boy..loose lips..

I told the ppl who I thought would support me, one of my friends is a nurse..she got online and researched it with me..she has been my biggest Cheerleader.

When ppl found out did you have to deal with negative feedback? How did you handle it?

I hope you guys don't mind the questions..

I've been reading this board like crazy for the last couple of weeks..I love the diverse opinions..and the stories and how close you guys are..hope to become part of the family more and more

Welcome to the BAFamily!  Although I do understand why some prefer not to tell anyone or hardly one, for me, I told ANYONE and EVERYONE who would listen. I must admit at times I feel like I am under a freaking microscope.  I most def had to deal with negativity and I just kept it moving. 

Thank you (uuum BAF?)

see I can be a lil flip at the mouth, although I'll keep it moving it wont' before I let them know how I feel. I understand everyone has an opinion..but don't be all rude about it.. Just say Good luck..or NOT.. and go.

I thin****il I get a surgery date..I'll keep it on the hush

BAF= Black American Forum

But I feel you. I didn't tell ANY of my family members. NONE. The only ones I told were my live-in fiance',  friends that already had the surgery, and coworkers who had it or are leaning towards it. That's it. I had and have enough support without telling anyone else. I had to really realize and convince myself that my family (mom in particular) didn't need to know. I was really struggling and stressing over how to tell them, and then when they tried to call me crazy and talk me out of it, how to just say f it and do it anyway. So to avoid all that, I didn't say jack!

I told my sister, my nephew and my best friend. 

I told everybody!!!! The negative feedback came from my husband and we split up so, there you have it.  I don't regret it, I just wish I would have done the RNY initially if I was going to have issues and need a revision.

hi mommy

LOL@ "i'm a lil flip at the mouth"

i told my best friend in case anything happened on the table, now she's good at privacy but has the opposite of a poker face so now her boyfriend knows cuz everytime during that period he asked why is she away from home at Christmas time again?  she said (story text) but looked like this

told my boyfriend the day i flew out.  so 3 people (and ya'll) know.   negative comments aside, i'm okay with curiosity but not scrutiny.

exactly Marlo T.. scrutiny I'm not in for

My hubby is s big man and I thought he'd feel some way about it..but he said "I'm behind you 150%, this is what you want..and you should have it"..

My sister was happy too.. she was like Good for you.. but she has always been supportive, no matter what size I am she has never treated me any differently..

My nurse gf said .. "I'm taking off th day of ur surgery, I'll be there when you go in and when you come out.. and if you need me anytime after that'..

I love my friends..

Yeah my tongue is a gift and a curse!! lol I'm learning though..I filter before speaking most times

everybody supporting you, thas fresh  <--- i know, shhh 

i'm guilty of hoof n' mouth disease sometimes too, maybe we can help each other out from time to time.  lol!

you'll learn a lot on this site and at the very least be amongst more friends.

p.s. i saw your question mark baf = black american forum

I told 3 friends (1 who had RNY already), my boss and my fiance.  I chose NOT to tell because I know the personalities of my friends and family members and I did not want to waste time before WLS explaining and defending my decision to have it.  I felt it was more important to take that time to really prepare myself for what was ahead without all the extra.

Fast forward to the present:  I am now a little over 2 months out and those 5 people are still the only ones I've told.  I do not regret this decision.  Family that I've seen lately have commented that I'm losing weight but I'm getting married in a few months so what bride isn't trying to lose weight.  I will definitely tell more folk as time passes but I needed to experience this journey and gain some insight for myself first.  Even when I do decide to share, I will be very selective.

Good luck with your decision.