Six Months Out & Miserable

OK-- I know it's been a while since I posted--but...

Long story short- I'm six months out and feeling wonderful! Except- now that I've lost weight I have a new found love for LIFE! I want to live it to the fullest...I've even gone back to school.  This is causing major issues for my marriage and I'm seriously considering divorce.  Would love to hear from anyone with similar issues.

Have you tried couples counselling?  Would he be open to going? 

Thankfully I didn't meet my now spouse until I was a year post-op. 

When I see post like yours the first thing that cross my mind is I would bet there were problems BEFORE you had surgery and this was just salt added to the wound.

I agree with Sue you may want to consider couple counseling and get to the root of the problem. 

Much luck to you!!

What bothers me the most is that I don't want to fight the battle anymore...

if you don't want to fight the battle anymore, its over.  go ahead and either divorce him or do the "hood divorce" which is where you don't actually file any papers...you just leave and start a new life.

LOL... I feel that maybe I'm being selfish-- but I have hung in there and tried to make our marriage work for years (for our teenage son's sake).  Perhaps that contributed to my 150+ weight gain--who knows.  Truthfully now I do want out-- I don't want to hurt him or my son but I'm sooo unhappy.

I couldn't just tell you to leave but in my opnion, if you are staying in a marriage for all of the "wrong" reasons ...it's a good chance that you will be miserable.

HOWEVER.........

I think you at least owe it to your husband to let him know why you don't want to fight for the marriage anymore. If it were me...I would do the counseling, you may chnage your mind...then again it can allow you both to dissolve the marriage on a "friendly" level instead of a bar brawl.


I pray God guides your heart into the right direction...be blessed.

My personal history precludes me from giving any sort of marital advice.   However, you owe it to yourself and your family to try a counselor with an open mind before disolving your marraige.  

I have a legal divorce and a hood divorce, both initiated by me.  I'm not sorry about either, but I do know relationships don't come back from divorce.  You need to be certain it's what you want, and your marraige is unsalvageable.  

You all deserve to be happy.  Just make sure you are on the right road to happiness with or without your marraige.  

(((((HUGS)))))

(((Shawna))) you know if there was problems b4 LS then there is going to be even bigger after wards because self esteems is on a all time high.
Marriage is work and you have to be willing to put the hours in. Couples that have been married for 20+ and 40+ yrs go through and went threw craps as well.
To be honest i thought that i would be posting this (well I actually wouldn't have posted in a public forum JBH ) , but my obesity now over weight has nothing to do with problems in my marriage and if anything it has made our relationship stronger because a biotch going to voice her opinion quicker today then a year ago, and we both are willing to do the work.
Maybe your partner is feeling a little intimidated by your new found love for life and doesn't know how to express that.  Good Luck and be true to your self which ever road your choose.