Was I wrong for this????
You just reminded me to carry that over to R&R - couple of other folk look for the 'installments' yall WRONG for that!!!!
WHEW - you hit the nail on the HEAD! No I don't jump like I used to - and ain't gonna!!!! I just gotta get to the point where it doesn't even phase me........ that's gonna take a while......
WHEW - you hit the nail on the HEAD! No I don't jump like I used to - and ain't gonna!!!! I just gotta get to the point where it doesn't even phase me........ that's gonna take a while......
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price....... 
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
Momma might have been wrong for basically wanting things her way but maybe you need to change the way you say things." It's not what you say but how she say it" .I feel you when you say she plucks your nerves because that's what Momma's do but Always remember that you only get one. I wish mine was here to get on my nerves.
Umm - you ain't seen some of the other stories about MY mama. I know her and it ain't no way to say no when she decides she wants something done. TRUST me.
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
I feel your pain, MM! She was both petty and self-absorbed to have a tantrum like that.
You absolutely had the right to decline her request (especially under the pressures/schedule of the day) and not have a repercussion for it. Same goes with the 'get on your knees to validate my point' situation Sunday after all you had done.
My Mom, though I love her dearly, is hard to manage, and behaves like that on a regular basis.
My dad absolutely adored her, put her waaaaaaaaaaayyyyy up on a pedestal, saw no flaws in her, gave her everything she ever wanted; fully princess-ed her. Sadly, he died when I was 20, she was 51. She believes that I should continue his set up. It's taken decades to understand this whole dynamic!
When I was young, I was constantly jumping through hoops to please her. With her, it involved spending alot of money I shouldn't have spent to meet her expectations.
Many an interaction between my Mom & I have concluded with me going away with hurt feelings after much time/money/efforts seemingly 'dismissed' like nothing happened since not meeting the last item on her list, or being convinced of the point she was making. She either laid a heavy layer of guilt on me, or had a tantrum until I gave in.
Over the years, I've come to see the manipulation for what it is. Now, in my 40's, I finally learned to say no and reset expectations of hers (and of others) who exploited the giver in me.
A great read on this subject, which gave me new perspective and some coping is Boundaries by Henry Cloud. www.amazon.com/Boundaries-When-Take-Control-Your/dp/B001ATHMXS/ref=sr_1_1
As I said, I love her, but I had to learn that this relationship is 2 way, and I had to stop allowing myself to come away feeling bad or guilty if I refused to be controlled; or foolish (& often broke) if I gave in. She didn't like the change in me, but it was painfully necessary for us both to mature.
Whew! It can be exhausting!
You absolutely had the right to decline her request (especially under the pressures/schedule of the day) and not have a repercussion for it. Same goes with the 'get on your knees to validate my point' situation Sunday after all you had done.
My Mom, though I love her dearly, is hard to manage, and behaves like that on a regular basis.
My dad absolutely adored her, put her waaaaaaaaaaayyyyy up on a pedestal, saw no flaws in her, gave her everything she ever wanted; fully princess-ed her. Sadly, he died when I was 20, she was 51. She believes that I should continue his set up. It's taken decades to understand this whole dynamic!
When I was young, I was constantly jumping through hoops to please her. With her, it involved spending alot of money I shouldn't have spent to meet her expectations.
Many an interaction between my Mom & I have concluded with me going away with hurt feelings after much time/money/efforts seemingly 'dismissed' like nothing happened since not meeting the last item on her list, or being convinced of the point she was making. She either laid a heavy layer of guilt on me, or had a tantrum until I gave in.
Over the years, I've come to see the manipulation for what it is. Now, in my 40's, I finally learned to say no and reset expectations of hers (and of others) who exploited the giver in me.
A great read on this subject, which gave me new perspective and some coping is Boundaries by Henry Cloud. www.amazon.com/Boundaries-When-Take-Control-Your/dp/B001ATHMXS/ref=sr_1_1
As I said, I love her, but I had to learn that this relationship is 2 way, and I had to stop allowing myself to come away feeling bad or guilty if I refused to be controlled; or foolish (& often broke) if I gave in. She didn't like the change in me, but it was painfully necessary for us both to mature.
Whew! It can be exhausting!
Open RNY/GB removal/appendectomy4/99; -132lbs; Re-gained 40lbs by '09; Now w/in 20lbs of goal/low wt
(deactivated member)
on 7/20/09 2:32 am - syracuse, NY
on 7/20/09 2:32 am - syracuse, NY
No you werent in bending down shape .....alot of us do things for our parents even when we dont feel like it but if your body is saying no then your mouth better follow a I second that emotion.
MM, I believe our mother are related because the how my ask and she just damn nosey and get on my last nerves. So I can understand where you are coming from.
That why I moved 45 minute from mines so you dont come to my house and think it hers.
That why I moved 45 minute from mines so you dont come to my house and think it hers.
HW 312/SW 293/CW 190.2/GW 160
1st mini goal 250 done 04/24/09
2nd mini goal under 200 done 09/11/2009
I will bless you and you will be a blessing Gensis 12:2
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