2 simple words

so i watched jon and kate last night and during wunna the interview segments he said "i'm not mad at kate" -  very brief background - he was photographed behaving *inappropriately* with another chick while kate was out of town at a speaking engagement.   alright so i'm not mad at kate........not contrite, sorta shrug your shoulderish, got me to thinkin.....

fellas what, if anything, makes it so difficult to apologize if/when you've done something wrong?

ladies, assuming it's important to you, what if anything, do you do or say if he won't apologize or does but with no sign of contrition?  script flippin - is it easy for you to apologize if you've done something to him?

in my younger days, i NEVER apologized....for ANYTHING.  i thought it was a show of weakness and to a young black man the last thing you ever wanna show is weakness.

but then i grew up

i've heard that before.   here's what i think about it

LOL.   seriously tho sam i have heard it but excuse me for sounding simple, why is it looked at as weak - what specifically about it did you think made it an un-manly thing to do, especially considering that you'd done something to apologize for?

****Disclaimer***  JMO

Some men feel that showing their feelings period is a sign of weakness.  They are taught as boys not to cry and stuff like that. 

I have raised my son alone,  and I used to cringe when relatives would say to him...'take care of your mama'.  How is a little 8 year old boy gonna take care of his mama?  Of course I didn't say anything but it used to bug me, even though I knew  it was the 'right' thing to instill in his mind at an early age. 

I think it stems from the way men are raised.  It's like admitting a wrong, or a mistake/ transgression.  They aren't 'supposed' to do that.  They are supposed to fix things and make them better.

kimmie!    how u feelin?

love the warn'ting!  LMAO!

i'm bout to go into supernova annoying analysis mode (thas my disclaimer) -  upbringing aside for a minute, if they can put it aside, doesn't saying the words help make things better? 

Nope, it's like admitting defeat.....some will go to their grave without ever saying those words.

I'm feeling pretty good, thanks for asking!

aaah, admitting defeat.  um, still

thank you for trying to get me to see it tho

i was young and i held a foolish belief.  once i matured, i realized how wrong i was for carrying things like that.

you gone tell me to back the fugg up offa you in a second.  my question (and i'm sorry for using you as a representative for the species, but you're the only dude in here right now) the question is:  why did you think it was weak/what about apologizing made it unacceptable then?

thats what many of the older men i looked up to told me.

if you do something, and then you go back and say sorry for doing it, thats weak.  stand by it, right or wrong.