It's slow... I'd start something, but...

I was exactly where you were 2 years ago. I wanted to give up on the whole process. I just recently decided to retry again. I have since had the surgery and let me tell you it is HARD work. Do not have it if you are not willing to fully commit yourself to the process you WILL end up regretting it. That being said it is not an impossible task and can actually change your life immensely for the better. If you need more time to think it over by all means do that. Don't rush this serious decision. And there is no reason to beat yourself up for taking the time to be sure. But I will make the suggestion to not stay off the board. You can still learn a lot about good nutrition and exercising. Whether you decide to have the surgery or not these tips will only help you. Also take the time to read people's blogs. (the whole thing) because I promise you that you will relate to the stories and you will not feel so alone. I wish you well with any decision you decide to make.

I'm sorry to hear about you leaving - - if you haven't already check your BL, I sent you a message this morning in regard to your struggle.

Just know that you will be supported regardless of what you decide to do. This is such a major decision & it isn't meant to be rushed in to. So take your time & when (or if) the time is right you'll know.

thank you all so much for the kind words...

As far a****ting bottom - I did.

Let me try to explain quickly... started REALLY gaining weight  the summer before I turned 21.  so, that will be 14 years out of my 34 were obese.

this weight has changed me into a recluse - something that, will ALL my jacked up self esteem, I never was.  Always went out, partied, clubbed, etc... now - it's work, store, gym (when knee & both ankles all allow - rare these days).

It hurts to SIT. I  cried so hard @ work one day - trying to hide my sobs... couldn't get up, b/c my ankle was killing me (fell on it and I have an inversion sprain in both foot & ankle, and sprained or strained ligaments on foot - no heels - ok, i've broke that... no gym... about to break that). I was home on 4/4/09. PAIN!  I have fibromylagia - this was NOT that pain.  This was yo azz is to dayum fat for your little bitty azz bones pain!! Saw the Oprah w/ Star Jones.  realized that although I don't have health related obesity issues (yet!), that gee, joints are a health issue and I'm sick of the toll this weight is taken on my body - out of breath, can't wear heels all day, can't run, aching all over... just blah!

Was this a rash decision?  It may seem so, but the idea has been in my head for 5-6 years.  I was gun-ho on lap band.  Friend that is a nurse, 2 coworkers told me since I have GERD, no go.  Research backed them up.  So I questioned all 3 who had RNY... Each had a different experience.  Sat on it a bit.  Said was gonna do in 2007 to have surgery in 2008.  Well, family not down... asked that I @ eat give WW a try.  OK. lost 25 lbs - just shy of my 10%.  Gained 12 of it back (had a fibromyalgia flare up and there WW went).  did Curves, Metabolife, Zenical, etc...

So, a another coworker had his in March... talked to him. sat on that info a bit.  On 4/4/09, I just couldn't take it anymore - what this fat has done to my body, mind, and spirit.

So here I sit pizzed b/c my old friend self doubt has come around.  I met someone with my situation 4.5 years out today.  She said it's normal.  She got over it, it wasn't a deterrent.  she was 5'2" 250lbs.  Now she's 120lbs.  And her crap was WAY worse than mine.  she said if that's the only setback/negative thought I have, she said she advises I keep on going, b/c once the pounds roll off, I'll be motivated as hell!

So that's it - thank you all again.  i'm going to sit and reassess this weekend and pray,.

Now, if you will excuse me, I shall go eat hot dogs & fries.

BTW, I've given up fries b4 or cut to 1x a month... so it can be done... fry or my health?  i'm Krayz, but not stupid, lol!

Holla!

I just couldn't take it anymore - what this fat has done to my body, mind, and spirit.  <--- truer words have never been spoken.

I'm SO glad you are keeping your heart & mind open. I know when the time is right - things will fall into place. Stay strong, stay focused & most importantly stay blessed.  You've got this.

Hey KSK...Although you may not have diabetes, etc...guess what? You DO have medical reasons for surgery...the mere fact of your bones hurting...shortness of breath...inability to get around - those are reasons enough to consider...pray on...and make the decision for wls.

Doubt will grab your mind...squeeze your brain...and take hold of you to make you believe that because you failed at WW, diet meds, etc., you will fail at WLS...that is SOOO not true, love. 

I encourage you to seek counseling - you may actually be depressed or down because of your weight and what (in the back of your mind) you perceive as failure behavior.  Don't be so hard on yourself...it sounds like you have done your research about this surgery.  Turn your life around and decide...I am doing this for ME!  I want to LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST!!!

Don't miss out on what is out there for you...yet, due to your weight...you are not attaining it!

Blessings to you,

DD

Praying for! We all have our moments!
~A

I too have Fibromyalgia and understand that pain. I've had 3 rt knee surgeries and a rt. ankle surgery. You can read my profile or if you want to ask me any questions feel free to do so on the backline and I'll help anyway I can. Take care.

PLEASE don't give up.
.....
...........
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Aww, HELL.

((((((KSK)))))))

C'mon, now---you gotta shake that **** off.
You have an outpouring of support here, it seems--myself included.
Bring at least 1%. We can rally around and bring the other 99. Just bring that 1% for now, aight?

How 'bout you just keep showing up? Just show your face--if not--thats cool too--we'll still seek you out.
A few of us used to frequent the chat room during the late night hours--it was our little "support group" for one another--and I know for myself--it really served a purpose. PLEASE feel free to drop by if you're so inclined.
Wishing you the best of luck. Feel free to contact me.
C'mon now--shake it off
1%, alright?

"Ditto" to what my man, Hero, said.

 

I hear the pain in your post and it resonates with me.

 

For me, being morbidly obese was a miserable existence.  I used to go to bed early just so the day would end.  I could not bring myself to commit suicide, but if I would have been diagnosed with a terminal disease, it would have been a relief.  When they talked to me about the risk of dying from this surgery, my thoughts were if I died then at least it would be over.  I was willing to grab at any chance of having a real life that wasn’t suffocated by fat.  It was desperation, pure and simple, that made me turn to this surgery.  Nothing else that I had tried for over 30 years had worked.  It was either WLS or dying a slow wretched death.  It turned out to be the right choice for me.

 

I cannot advise you on what to do.  This is your life.  Only you know what you need and what you’re willing to do to make it happen. 

 

I wish you all the best.