Babygirl Gets Her Back Up...

Ok I will say it since nobody else will. Your daughter is right. Sometimes we as parents need to know when we are wrong in a situation. Just because you wear a parent badge doesn't mean that you are right. You had no business telling that little girl that. 1. Its none of your business 2. If you want to make it your business come to the table with a solution rather than  looking your nose down at this girls situation. That's the problem with people these days. Everyone wants to be so judgemental of other peoples mistakes without looking into the mirror and facing their own. Katrina said it best on facebook today "before you place rules and demands on someone else make sure you meet your "own" qualifications!"

I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU!!!!

Well..if things went down the way he states in this story. I think the "little woman " now that she pregnant. made it his business by telling him about it.  If I were in his shoes, I might have used a little more tact and probably without the cognac ( I prefer wine) but i would have been bound to give her a reality check too. Not only for her sake but for my daughter's sake as well. I think, his little Miss, might think twice about laying down with a boy after seeing the lashing her friend got and the embarassment that was caused.  Tough love is definitely warranted in some situations. It take a village to raise a child...and perhaps his words resonated with the girl and will have her look at what her boyfriend will bring to the table.... JMO. 

I find it funny how people want to develop "tough love" after the situation is done and over with. She's already pregnant. How about some "tough love" when these kids are all hanging out and having sex. Where are the adults and the parents with the "tough love" then. I mean (depending on the cir****tance because everyone can't be helped) there is a child bringing a child into the world. Not a woman a child. So as an adult with some life experience what kind of knowledge or wisdom can you impart on the kid to help her 1. not make the same mistake twice 2. not be a burden on taxpayers money. I personally know of a woman who I went to high school with who had a very strong family support system had a baby in high school. Not only did she graduate at the top of her class but she has now 10+ years later  a good job and her masters degree. To tell a child (yes child) that she will amount to nothing more than a welfare canidate is not only judgemental but to be honest inaccurate as well. No one can stand in judgement of someone elses potential.  I remember when I was pregnant with my daughter (no I wasn't a teenager I was an adult) a dr at a hospital tried to tell me I should get an abortion because I was going to be a single parent and I wasn't working at the time. She basically told me I had no way to care for this child and I didnt have the potential to care for her. Now statistics probably show that could have been true. But guess what I knew me. I knew what I was capable of and that what I was going through then was just a tough time in my life that would not last. And guess what I was right. I take care of my child very well and I do it by myself with no help from her father.  So you see if I listened to that healthcare professional I wouldn't be blessed with my precious little girl right now. 

 

The story states that his daughter brought up the welfare office. He said that he told her things would never be the same. That's a big difference and people (especially children) tend to exaggerate. Combine that with pregnancy hormones and baby bye.

And he also agrees that he handled the situation rough. There is always a way to say everything and I don't think the way he handled it and he agrees was the most appropriate way. But I also don't think that his daughter has the right to talk to her father any ol kinda of way either. Respect is a two way street. If she wants her father to respect her then she needs to learn how to communicate with him as well.

I agree that tough love needs to be there at the front.  In this particular story (which is all I am basing my comments on), it does not seem to me that Dad was in the mix from the beginning nor were the kids hanging out at his house having sex. I am the product of a teenage pregnancy myself...my mom was 16 years old when she had me. Mom was kicked out of the home and had to go on welfare to support us both.  She eventually got tired of the handouts and got  herself a G.E.D and then a J.O.B. to support me on her own.  When it was just the two of us things were great! She took responsibility because she had no choice.  I know these outcomes are not the same for everyone.  In regards to this scenario, all I am saying is that I don't agree that Dad was totally out of line. I SAID that I would have used a little more tact but agree that someone has got to tell her what she may be up against. She opened the door for this dialogue and he addressed it.  This 17 year old...probably soon to be 18 year old will be considered an adult once she has that baby... shes going to have to face the music...support or no support.  I say he gave her a little food for thought...nothing more...nothing less. The fact that she acting all hysterical...probably has more to do with her entire situation than what this man (whom she probably doesn't see that often (or he would have known she was pregnant...she would'nt have had to tell him)  said.  I applaud you for making your decision to keep your precious daughter.  I have two myself and nothing in this world can replace them.  Most mothers will do what they have to do for their kids. Unfortunately, not all are like that.  I applaud Donnie for at least saying something.  Most men would not have touched it with a 10 foot pole.  I didn't see any malice in his jestures....and he does agree that he could have been a little gentler.  I think we are all on the same page myself.

In my humble opinion...THAT attitude is why all these young people are walking around with their azzes on their backs and whacked sense of entitlement. They get too much crap spoon fed to them because someone being afraid feelings are going to get hurt!!! Reality is a biotch people. It is what it is. The okey doke is done what her knocked up in the first place, more than likely. Not to say she won't be OK, but she's gonna have a tougher road that she would have had.

OK, i'm man enuff to say i might have handle this one a little rough but babygirl betta guard her grill

true that. There is never a reason to be disrespectful to a parent. She needed to take a time out like you had to do then sat down with you and explained what was wrong with her. Maybe you would have been more open to listening to what she had to say.