Ok here is my question

Girl tell me about it. I have had friends tell me the craziest stuff that got me seriously scratching my head going HUH??? I too have bit my tongue as much as I can and let them live out their lives. But that being said I sometimes think that we as women should take responsibility for OURSELVES and not put ourselves in certain situations. Now if wilding out and get popped in the mouth is it right? NO but should you have put yourself in that situation? NO. If you jump in front of moving vehicle and it hits you is it tragic you got hit? Yeah. Is it expected? Um yeah. Just my opinion.

^5.  I'm with you.  I think my opinions will be different than most because I grew up with men.  I know the dumb sh*t broads can do and I know the aftermath, I see the human side of dudes that everyone assumes doesn't exist, so I tend to say "ok, but what did YOU do."  Chile one heffa threw a metal tool box at my brother's head.  Had he not been quick he'd be a cyclops right now.    He said he wanted to beat her ass so bad, and I totally get that..  I mean seriously, WTF?

Exactly and It reminds me of that Tyler Perry movie that came out a couple of months ago a Family that Preys together. Everyone saw that scene when Sanaa's husband forget his name hauled off and punched her in the mouth for the stuff she was doing. I am sorry (and I know I may get flamed for this) but me and the rest of the audience applauded. She needed to be popped in the mouth. Now to be PC about it what he could have done was found another female to give her the ass whoppin she needed and deserved.

I was waiting for him to punch her ass too!!!  When he did I was like "THANK YOU!"  I know my opinion aint PC, but I'm sorry that's how I feel, I'm with you girl.

For me, it depends on the offense.  Hitting is an automatic deal breaker for me.

Cheating......NOW I tend to be unforgiving on that too, but in my younger years, I did (depending on the cir****tances) give a second chance on that.

I think I have gotten pretty unyielding with age...LOL

Determining someone's character is so hard.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt...especially when it's someone I've known for a long time and THINK I know well...but after getting screwed over in the past....it makes it that much harder for me to trust people.

I have never been abused in a relationship. And in my head I think to myself that if it ever did happen I would just walk away.  But determing the character of a person is so hard and it reaches beyond whether or not the person hits you. There are so many aspects to a relationship. I strive to surround myself with positive people. People that I think have good character and I find that I get disappointed time and time again. And Kim, I hate to admit this but as time goes on I am finding it harder and harder to trust people too.

First so tired of hearing about Chris and Rhianna - rich mofos..

My thought once a man hit or cheat on you does not mean it will ALWAYS be done, ALTHOUGH I would forgive if someone cheat on me ONCE.

BUT will stalk and kill a mofo if he ever raised his hand at me.

Too me the way you can determine the character by the person first clue (spend time around the person family) 9 times out of 10 that will give you some sort of vision.

Discuss difference views with your significant other and see how they answer them.

And then throw certain things their way and see how they respond.

FYI just because a person may not hit you  or cheat on you they STILL can have a LOT OF ISSUES.

I don't think this is a sign of character however I'm against a man hitting a woman EVER.

It doesn't matter WHAT the situation is you can stop a woman from beating your ass or hitting you. There is no excuse none whatsoever to hit a woman. I'm not saying let her beat you down or nothing but take control of the situation. You should either dismiss yourself or restrain her from beating ya a$$.

Cheating is different.......I personally think its how a person cheats. Emotional cheating and financiallly cheating to me is worse than physical cheating....AND of course here is where the conversation gets ignorant for me....but yall know where I stand w/ that...

Ok how do you judge someone's character?

I am not even going to touch the cheating comment.

FYI just because a person may not hit you  or cheat on you they STILL can have a LOT OF ISSUES.

I agree 100% Mrs. Rhonda. Never have truer words been spoken.  That's why you have to be careful about who you get in a relationship with. Because like I was telling a friend the other day. Relationships are easy to get in but hard to get out of. And in my experience every relationship that I have been in when it ended a piece of me died with it.  Don't get me wrong I learned a lot from the experiences and I needed to go through certain things to shape me into the adult I am today but it still had an effect on me.