How far do YOU go?

When you start dating someone, how far do you go?  What I mean by that is...

When I am dating you for the first 2 months minimum, you are not coming to my house, I am not riding in the car with you, etc.

I will meet you wherever we go and IT WILL BE A PUBLIC PLACE.

If I am interested in pursuing things further, I will question you about your job history, past relationships, HIV status, etc.

I will also google the hell out of you prior to a first date and am quick to run a full criminal background and credit check.

Nosey?  HELL YES but I will err on the side of caution.  You just don't know these days. 

So do you just go with the flow or are you more conservative?

Hmmm...I have usually been in the past the type to just go with the flow.  Unfortunately I have been burned by being too easy going.  I am going to have to hit you up on the back line to get info on how to properly check up on the somebody new that may be a part of my life.

I will have to answer when I get home.  Worked blocked me out of PMs.

Well here ya go.  Do you let the men know you're checking up on them?  How much info do you need in order to get the info you really need? Why the credit check (spoken as someone trying to clean my own **** up)?  What info do you get back that is an automatic oh hell no?  Do you confront them on info you find, or do you beat around the bsh and hope they're honest?

Because credit reports also list certain felonies that a regular background check may miss as well as spouse info.

It's not that you are a no go for bad credit because mine isn't that great but I want to know that you are not a serious felon, habitual bankruptcy client or married.

Ok gotcha.  I didn't realize felony info was in a credit check as well.

One thing to remember Michelle is not every criminal HAVE a background the good ones are the ones who have NEVER beem caught... We as women have a great "intuition" and when something seems to good to be true (listen to that inner you)... Although, I am married now the dating I did 5 years would be TOTALLY different now. The great thing is I no longer have a minor child so I don't have to worry about exposing my son to "perverts".... NOW it is just me and my scairy azz would STILL be leary. Remember it is NOT where you meet the person now BUT getting to "know" a person.... 

 publicdata.com is a low cost background service...

Thanks.  At times I have ignored the red flags thinking there would be a resonable answer to any doubts I have.  I guess the mistake I make is that I go out and pretty honest and am an open book.  I make the mistake of thinking that since I am honest that those I deal with are working on the same principle.

For curiosty's sake, how did you and your hubby meet?

Thanks for the website info.

I met him at a club (can you believe that)??? Oddly, I was a year
post-op and decided to get out there and "mingle" and met that joker, I MEAN my husband...   I also work for a law-firm so I have access to a "few" things just in case you need an investigator..

Damn wish I had done some checking up on the "Thief".  I don't think I'll ever be quite so naive or gullable again.