This Christmas...
Good morning, Family,
This morning I woke up with a very heavy heart. I thought and thought and decided to post to the board MY personal testimony during the Christmas holiday season.
Yesterday alone, I learned of the death of a great neighbor - he had a massive heart attack yesterday morning and died yesterday afternoon. Last night, one of my best buddies and his sisters went to their moms to decorate her Christmas tree...he had been trying to reach his mom all day, but no answer...HE KNEW SHE WAS GONE. They got to their mom's place, opened the door, and found her dead in her wheelchair.
Then I logged on and read that Mere's brother passed away; I read that Kim is still having a rough time at Christmas - and then I realized that yes, I needed to share my own story.
Eleven years ago, my mom was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. She had a rough time of it - and so did I! My mother (in her own special way) decided that I would be the family member to dump all of her frustration, anger and hurt. She ragged me, cursed me, talked about me, abused me (verbally) - you name it, and it was dumped on me. She was DYING of cancer.
During the Thanksgiving holiday, we had a falling out over NOTHING...because that's how ANGRY she was that she had cancer and that this cancer would eventually kill her. We didn't speak for a month...It was the 2nd worst Thanksgiving in my life. So Christmas is coming up and yep, you guessed it...we fell out again..this time, no communication at all leading up to the holidays. She was so, so angry (God bless her heart).
But God! The Sunday after Christmas, my pastor preached a sermon about the spirit of Christmas. He shared with the congregation that we were going into a new year (1998) and that we should learn how to leave the old year's events, angers, etc. - IN THE OLD YEAR! It was that day that my mother went into the hospital (for the last time). it was also that day that I vowed that I would call my mom to talk to her - regardless of how angry she thought she was with me (although began to realize she was angry with God, not me).
She called me to tell me she was in the hospital; a few days later, we learned her cancer had spread...the following week, she's angry - AGAIN! But this was a different anger...it was deep, in her soul (she was leaving us...didn't want us to know)...
The day she died, I received a phone call from her saying to me, "Oh, Donna, (sighing)...should I tell them to kill me or what?!"
Later that day, she died...gone...no more...and I was so overwhelmed with the question of WHY?!
But through it all. I learned to JUST LET THINGS GO!!! Life is too precious for us to not say "I'm sorry!" Life is too short for us to go on every day in anger and love for a person and to not say to them..."Let's not do this...I love you (and need you) to survive!"
Take the time this blessed holiday season to give someone a call...that someone you haven't spoken to in a long time...to wish them a Happy New Year; to let them know you love them; to let them know you CARE!
Kim, girl, I know how you feel - it is very difficult to celebrate in a season that you feel so alone...I encourage you to let your family know the truth - you do not feel like being with them right now; thank them for the invitation - and let them know that you'll get back to them in YOUR OWN TIME!
Mere - You have experienced so much loss during the holidays - Words cannot express to you what you should do - but I know that you trust God in all things - Trust Him to bring you through this season of great joy and great sadness.
Well, I have had my cry today...and now I am heading to work.
God bless you all...and I wish each of you a joyous Christmas, Kwanzaa and New Year!
DD
This morning I woke up with a very heavy heart. I thought and thought and decided to post to the board MY personal testimony during the Christmas holiday season.
Yesterday alone, I learned of the death of a great neighbor - he had a massive heart attack yesterday morning and died yesterday afternoon. Last night, one of my best buddies and his sisters went to their moms to decorate her Christmas tree...he had been trying to reach his mom all day, but no answer...HE KNEW SHE WAS GONE. They got to their mom's place, opened the door, and found her dead in her wheelchair.
Then I logged on and read that Mere's brother passed away; I read that Kim is still having a rough time at Christmas - and then I realized that yes, I needed to share my own story.
Eleven years ago, my mom was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. She had a rough time of it - and so did I! My mother (in her own special way) decided that I would be the family member to dump all of her frustration, anger and hurt. She ragged me, cursed me, talked about me, abused me (verbally) - you name it, and it was dumped on me. She was DYING of cancer.
During the Thanksgiving holiday, we had a falling out over NOTHING...because that's how ANGRY she was that she had cancer and that this cancer would eventually kill her. We didn't speak for a month...It was the 2nd worst Thanksgiving in my life. So Christmas is coming up and yep, you guessed it...we fell out again..this time, no communication at all leading up to the holidays. She was so, so angry (God bless her heart).
But God! The Sunday after Christmas, my pastor preached a sermon about the spirit of Christmas. He shared with the congregation that we were going into a new year (1998) and that we should learn how to leave the old year's events, angers, etc. - IN THE OLD YEAR! It was that day that my mother went into the hospital (for the last time). it was also that day that I vowed that I would call my mom to talk to her - regardless of how angry she thought she was with me (although began to realize she was angry with God, not me).
She called me to tell me she was in the hospital; a few days later, we learned her cancer had spread...the following week, she's angry - AGAIN! But this was a different anger...it was deep, in her soul (she was leaving us...didn't want us to know)...
The day she died, I received a phone call from her saying to me, "Oh, Donna, (sighing)...should I tell them to kill me or what?!"
Later that day, she died...gone...no more...and I was so overwhelmed with the question of WHY?!
But through it all. I learned to JUST LET THINGS GO!!! Life is too precious for us to not say "I'm sorry!" Life is too short for us to go on every day in anger and love for a person and to not say to them..."Let's not do this...I love you (and need you) to survive!"
Take the time this blessed holiday season to give someone a call...that someone you haven't spoken to in a long time...to wish them a Happy New Year; to let them know you love them; to let them know you CARE!
Kim, girl, I know how you feel - it is very difficult to celebrate in a season that you feel so alone...I encourage you to let your family know the truth - you do not feel like being with them right now; thank them for the invitation - and let them know that you'll get back to them in YOUR OWN TIME!
Mere - You have experienced so much loss during the holidays - Words cannot express to you what you should do - but I know that you trust God in all things - Trust Him to bring you through this season of great joy and great sadness.
Well, I have had my cry today...and now I am heading to work.
God bless you all...and I wish each of you a joyous Christmas, Kwanzaa and New Year!
DD
I choose to love myself, live life to the fullest, and encourage others to liberate themselves!
Donna (my secrete auntie)... . Thank you for sharing this with us today. It was uplifting and thought prevoking. You are in my thoughts and in my prayers on this day. And I will take heed and make a much needed phone call, extend my sincerest apologizies, encourage someone else, just be a child of God and spread His love.
Thank you so much for this precious gift....
Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year....
Kim
Thank you so much for this precious gift....
Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year....
Kim
Thank you....two simple words that have such a strong and genuine meaning 
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