And the B-day weekend story - AGAIN - this is the type shiot that ONLY happens to me...
aiight - so this was my B-day weekend I was set to have a GOOD ole time - just chill and do whatever *I* decided to do...... so...........
Friday night - EXCELLENT time with the BF - I was dog azz tired, but he took some serious TLC for ya girl - I was a HAPPY mofoin camper!!!!
Sat -----
Morning - hit the gym - put down SERIOUS work - felt gooder than a mug
Afternoon - lobster and steak lunch with my girl, followed by shopping (love that shiot - got some serious deals!!!)
Night - out to tha club, met up with Mrs. CC.... THIS IS WHERE THE GOOD STORY COMES IN........
OK- so we start the night off at a club I ain't never been to on my side of town - nice spot, good vibe..... just was kinda dead...... we saw a club on the other side of the skreet that was jumpin when we came thru for the spot we was at so we decide to bounce and go to that one - it's a hole in the wall - so much so that when I first parked, a chick rolled up beside me and told me I needed to move my ride up closer to the club cause 'the crackheads will **** yo shiot up'....... I love the 'ghetto parking guides' - that be some helpful information!!!!!
Get in the club and it's #1 - NO COVER and #2 - got a domino room in the back so I KNOW it's about to be on and poppin!!!!!! LOL - good music - fun folk - just down to ERF!!!!
So - tha Mack goes to work scopin out the dudes...... Here tha list;
1 - miscellaneous short older dude, not cute to me, eyeing me like a T-Bone
2 - Big, greasy ugly dude - I officially 'remove' that side of the club from my vision cause eye contact gets you talked to - I ain't even wanna have no conversation
3 - Nappy headed throw back dude - mofo looked like he was from Rockwell's 'I always feel like' video!!!! Complete with throwback outfit - I SWEAR that was a member's only jacket he had on.... CC - remember him!!!!! That mofo tried to get at me and spilled a ****** beer all over my legs!!!!!! Dude #1 handed me a stack of napkins - tryna get a free feel offering to 'help me' NOT!!!!!
No Buyee de drinkee, no feely da leggy...... LOL!!!
4 - lil short, dark, cute dude - clean tho - dressed in all white - gets props for pullin that move - you can't wear all white in a hole in the wall and keep it clean..........
and finally......... 5 - older cowboy lookin dude.......
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - I decide that either #4 or #5 gon be graced to hang with the Mack for the night...... #5 won cause he was the first to offer to buy me a drink... LOL!!! Free shiot will always catch my eye!!! Turns out homey is 53, truck driver, and wants to buy me the world.... blah, blah, blah - just get me my next drank nicca...... LOL!!! I was glad I chose him cause #4 started hollerin at a jacked up grill chick when he saw me with #5..... any mofo that would move from me to her - BAD DECISION maker..... not worth my time no way.... LOL
I yack and chat with #5 through 3 drinks and two dances - then i decide it's time for me to bounce - he offers to take me to breakfast.... MO free shiot?? SHO!!! Imma go!!!! My DNA does not allow me to turn down free shiot.... so i let him hook me up at Denny's...... THIS is where it turns south......
Now all this time - homie been pretty cool, decent..... WHY O WHY in at the end of the breakfast THIS MUTHA*****A tells me he NEEDS to get laid?????!!!!!!!!!!!!
HUH???? What in the HOT HAM SAMMICH made you come at ME with THAT shiot????!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW HELLLLLLLLLL TO THA NAWWWWWWWWWW BOBBY!!
Dude - that's the end of the night right THUR!!!!! Got my Doggie bag (sista ain't gon let no free food go to waste - besides, that's the end the night snack right there) and I proceed to let him know that at 3AM THIS P*SSY is CLOSED!!!!! Homie tried to get all up in my mouf at my car --
Get up off me man!!!!!! Talking bout 'I'm real lonely' NO ****** WONDER!!!!! Yo azz gon BE lonely tonight AGAIN!!!!! The first three letters on my licence plate are NFP - that stands for NOT FREE P*SSY!!! and you did NOT buy THIS punnanie for the MAYBE $36 you laid out for my dranks and food ---- the MACK is NOT the one!!!!
I hopped in my Spawty Shawty (nickname for my ride) and burnt the **** off!!!! Mofo was driving a manual Ford Ranger anyway - wasn't NO WAY he could keep up with me to follow if he WANTED TO!!!!! Besides - I told that mutha*****a it was my burfday and told him to guess my age - dumazz said 40!!!!
you don't get a chance at the THOUGHT of MAYBE hittin it EVER in the future JUST for ****** THAT up so bad!!!! My azz is 33!!!!!
DAMN - I shoulda keep rollin with #4 - he at least 'guessed' I was only 30..... he was at least SMART enough to LIE to me........ LMAOOOOOOOOO
Friday night - EXCELLENT time with the BF - I was dog azz tired, but he took some serious TLC for ya girl - I was a HAPPY mofoin camper!!!!
Sat -----
Morning - hit the gym - put down SERIOUS work - felt gooder than a mug
Afternoon - lobster and steak lunch with my girl, followed by shopping (love that shiot - got some serious deals!!!)
Night - out to tha club, met up with Mrs. CC.... THIS IS WHERE THE GOOD STORY COMES IN........
OK- so we start the night off at a club I ain't never been to on my side of town - nice spot, good vibe..... just was kinda dead...... we saw a club on the other side of the skreet that was jumpin when we came thru for the spot we was at so we decide to bounce and go to that one - it's a hole in the wall - so much so that when I first parked, a chick rolled up beside me and told me I needed to move my ride up closer to the club cause 'the crackheads will **** yo shiot up'....... I love the 'ghetto parking guides' - that be some helpful information!!!!!
Get in the club and it's #1 - NO COVER and #2 - got a domino room in the back so I KNOW it's about to be on and poppin!!!!!! LOL - good music - fun folk - just down to ERF!!!!
So - tha Mack goes to work scopin out the dudes...... Here tha list;
1 - miscellaneous short older dude, not cute to me, eyeing me like a T-Bone
2 - Big, greasy ugly dude - I officially 'remove' that side of the club from my vision cause eye contact gets you talked to - I ain't even wanna have no conversation
3 - Nappy headed throw back dude - mofo looked like he was from Rockwell's 'I always feel like' video!!!! Complete with throwback outfit - I SWEAR that was a member's only jacket he had on.... CC - remember him!!!!! That mofo tried to get at me and spilled a ****** beer all over my legs!!!!!! Dude #1 handed me a stack of napkins - tryna get a free feel offering to 'help me' NOT!!!!!
No Buyee de drinkee, no feely da leggy...... LOL!!! 4 - lil short, dark, cute dude - clean tho - dressed in all white - gets props for pullin that move - you can't wear all white in a hole in the wall and keep it clean..........
and finally......... 5 - older cowboy lookin dude.......
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - I decide that either #4 or #5 gon be graced to hang with the Mack for the night...... #5 won cause he was the first to offer to buy me a drink... LOL!!! Free shiot will always catch my eye!!! Turns out homey is 53, truck driver, and wants to buy me the world.... blah, blah, blah - just get me my next drank nicca...... LOL!!! I was glad I chose him cause #4 started hollerin at a jacked up grill chick when he saw me with #5..... any mofo that would move from me to her - BAD DECISION maker..... not worth my time no way.... LOL
I yack and chat with #5 through 3 drinks and two dances - then i decide it's time for me to bounce - he offers to take me to breakfast.... MO free shiot?? SHO!!! Imma go!!!! My DNA does not allow me to turn down free shiot.... so i let him hook me up at Denny's...... THIS is where it turns south......
Now all this time - homie been pretty cool, decent..... WHY O WHY in at the end of the breakfast THIS MUTHA*****A tells me he NEEDS to get laid?????!!!!!!!!!!!!
HUH???? What in the HOT HAM SAMMICH made you come at ME with THAT shiot????!!!!AAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWW HELLLLLLLLLL TO THA NAWWWWWWWWWW BOBBY!!
Dude - that's the end of the night right THUR!!!!! Got my Doggie bag (sista ain't gon let no free food go to waste - besides, that's the end the night snack right there) and I proceed to let him know that at 3AM THIS P*SSY is CLOSED!!!!! Homie tried to get all up in my mouf at my car --
Get up off me man!!!!!! Talking bout 'I'm real lonely' NO ****** WONDER!!!!! Yo azz gon BE lonely tonight AGAIN!!!!! The first three letters on my licence plate are NFP - that stands for NOT FREE P*SSY!!! and you did NOT buy THIS punnanie for the MAYBE $36 you laid out for my dranks and food ---- the MACK is NOT the one!!!! I hopped in my Spawty Shawty (nickname for my ride) and burnt the **** off!!!! Mofo was driving a manual Ford Ranger anyway - wasn't NO WAY he could keep up with me to follow if he WANTED TO!!!!! Besides - I told that mutha*****a it was my burfday and told him to guess my age - dumazz said 40!!!!
you don't get a chance at the THOUGHT of MAYBE hittin it EVER in the future JUST for ****** THAT up so bad!!!! My azz is 33!!!!! DAMN - I shoulda keep rollin with #4 - he at least 'guessed' I was only 30..... he was at least SMART enough to LIE to me........ LMAOOOOOOOOO
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price....... 
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
The moral of the story: a) stop taking free chiot, I guess and 2) so, you look 40 even though ur 33, eh? 
"When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept for there were no more worlds to conquer." Plutach. Not true, for there are always more worlds to conquer.
www.myspace.com/dalexis863
Oh - you soooo funny!!!!!!
I ain't NEVER gonna stop taking free shiot!!! LOL - I knew my 'out' with that mofo was my car and staying in PUBLIC places..... lmaooooooo
And KISS MY *SS!!! I don't look 40 - that's yo old azz you lookin at in the mirror!!!!!!
I ain't NEVER gonna stop taking free shiot!!! LOL - I knew my 'out' with that mofo was my car and staying in PUBLIC places..... lmaooooooo
And KISS MY *SS!!! I don't look 40 - that's yo old azz you lookin at in the mirror!!!!!!
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
<----#1 Mack GranMamma. "When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept for there were no more worlds to conquer." Plutach. Not true, for there are always more worlds to conquer.
www.myspace.com/dalexis863
Girl - I shoulda went for one of the biker dudes...... LOL!!!
I don't just have issues, I have subscriptions! I'm saving on the newsstand price.......
Check out my dating mis - adventures at: http://1macdatinggame.blogspot.com/
Inspire,
Call it the "Cliff Notes" version. :-D
Call it the "Cliff Notes" version. :-D
"When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he wept for there were no more worlds to conquer." Plutach. Not true, for there are always more worlds to conquer.
www.myspace.com/dalexis863
Most Active
Recent Topics
