My Dinner date last night......
Ok I will not jump on you for your self esteem taking a hit. I understand. The truth is your self esteem was already hit and you were feeling self concious before you even stepped foot out that door to go on that date. My guess is that you already felt bad about the weight gain and when he cosigned the madness that was going through your own head thats when you began to feel bad about yourself. I do not care if you put on 20 or 30 pounds. You are still a beautiful woman. Like others said on the post you are an inspiration to ME. If you ever want to know if you touched one person's life with your journey now you know you have. ME. The last thing you need to do at your low point is to stay away from the board that gives you nothing but luv and support. I am not going to address what he could've, wouldv'e, shouldve said. He is NOT IMPORTANT. Like you said you didn't even want to go out with him in the first place so....my advice to you would be next time listen to what your head and heart say and do not settle for someone you never wanted in the first place.
Side note: I am wearing my hair natural, I have been growing it out so I can eventually get micro's. Anywhoo... Last week I was on the bus going home from work. It was late and I was tired. I was reading my book minding my own business when I hear some teenage girls behind me saying she need a comb for her hair. Why her hair so nappy. Laughing at me. She need a perm. They were so loud and everyone was looking at me because they wanted to see who they were talking about. I never turned around. I kept reading. Then one of the teenaged heffers got up close in my ear. What you reading??? I ignored her. She kept asking and finally she sat back and left me alone. Finally the bus gets to the teenagers stop and I look up to see who these girls were. What walked past me was the biggest, sloppiest girls I have ever seen. I could see the tracks of one girl from where I sat. The other girl had a ponytail that didn't match the rest of her hair, and her real hair was coming out of the ponytail. Her shirt was so small it kept riding up her big belly. I just shook my head at the ignorance that walked past me. I realized that those poor girls didn't like themselves so they had to find strangers to pick apart and criticize to make themselves feel better.
"Real change comes from within"
See, you a GREAT one! I don't play w/ kids and I let it be KNOWN quick. I use to get those situations from kids until I choked a few kids out, threatened to shoot one or maybe two (does showing your gun equal a threat) I believe in this law, if your grown enough to open your mouth at me your grown enough to get ya lil feelings hurt. You can say something stupid to me to hurt my lil boy feelings PLEASE BELIEVE i'm going to shiot on yours.
I was in Wal-Mart and this lil kid called me fat hell I had just ate something I knew I wasn't suppose to eat so I was already upset about that. Hey i'm fat I don't need some lil badd a$$ kid reminding me this thing sitting in my lap do a damn good job at that already. So i politely bent over told him he was a nappy headed ugly lil kid who's mamma should be ashamed and then threatend he punk a$$ daddy to say something smart, he didn't just looked me upside my head like I was crazy and kept it moving. I in turn said he was a punk b*tch and he still kep it moving. I was willing to take it there ALL THE WAY THERE and I think he knew. Call me crazy or ignorant or whatever you want its just the way it is and how I am. But I bet you this he'll NEVER CALL SOMEONE ELSE FAT.
LESSON LEARNED!
Now...I have a question...why are you allowing this man to bring your self-esteem down? I read where you're not interested in him and only went out because he kept bugging you...however, however...his words have hit you like a ton of bricks and sending you in hiding until you return a size 4? Girl please...I'm going to ride down with Shortstack74 and pop you one good time too
becaue this man or no one for that matter should be able to say something so immature to tear you down like this. Continue being who you are and don't let folks easily break shake your self-esteem because afterall...I've learned in my years...when others feel the need to get a dig on you their feeling pretty low about themselves.I say **** him and keep doing you!
(that's right--you heard (saw) correct--thank him.)
Why?
IN the time span of however long your dinner date lasted, you found out from JUMP who and how he truly is.
More importantly, it caused you to reconsider ever going out with him again!
You should thank him!
Think about those who don't see the red flags some of these guys are waving--the ones that say "nothing to see here, people--keep it moving".
Just think--say that you HADN'T noticed....
From jump--he would've noticed that he could say whatever and get away with it.
he would've noticed that he had a certain amount of control of the "relationship" the MINUTE you called him back.
....and that would've only been the beginning.
Instead..you did take notice of his behavior. Granted--it has contributed to the way you're feeling right now, which is unfortunate--but you're getting the encouragement you need from everyone here. I truly hope it helps.
You're more than a weight size.
The approval or disapproval of anyone shouldn't make or break you.
You're more than the car you drive....
and you owe explanations to NO ONE.
I hope you reconsider your decision to stay away.
...and next time, when it comes to guys like this?
follow your gut.
(no pun intended)
**said with a sly smile--soft nudge given**
(and take his pic down! no need to look for ANY validation--he wasn't worth your time to BEGIN WITH--he's worth even LESS of your time to post his mug!)
1.) The BACKLINES have backlines. Watch what you say and more importantly WHO YOU SAY IT TO!! 2.) There are NO secrets on BAF. DON'T BE FOOLED!!
3.) The person who says: "I'm going to tell you something, but you can't tell anyone." has already TOLD 50 other people!
No--this isn't from experience--well, not MINE anyway!
Glad to see you.
Your presence was missed.
Thank you for your generosity--hope to see you soon.
1.) The BACKLINES have backlines. Watch what you say and more importantly WHO YOU SAY IT TO!! 2.) There are NO secrets on BAF. DON'T BE FOOLED!!
3.) The person who says: "I'm going to tell you something, but you can't tell anyone." has already TOLD 50 other people!
No--this isn't from experience--well, not MINE anyway!
