Hi FlowerChild80...what are your regrets?
My date is coming up and I am looking for some "cons" to counter all the "pros"...whatever they may be. I just feel I want to know both sides before doing this.
Thanks :)  Kd

I have some suggestions and opinions for you, if you don't mind. One is that I am currently 36 years old, and I have never been a drinker, even when I was in my teens and 20's. I'm also not a shy person or a particularly uptight person, I've just never found drinking to be my thing.

For one I found it amusing being sober and watching everyone else getting drunk.. lots of things to laugh at. I also could always be counted on to be the designated driver and didn't have to worry about doing stupid stuff while I was drunk or being taken advantage of.

I also found it helpful to hang out with other people that weren't drinkers. So although you might not like this suggestion, you might want to find some new friends. Maybe there are others out there that you have more in common with and who will be more supportive and inline with what you are about these days.

I have found that as I have had major changes over the years, I have at times had to find new sets of friends that I can relate to. Very few people in my life understand or can relate to most of the aspects in my life.. so I have friends that can relate to my weight struggles, friends who can relate to me being a parent, other work friends, school friends, etc.

What I want to do and what I want to talk about often dictates who I hang out with. As far as putting yourself out there, please don't stop doing that! But there are a lot of great places to hang out, and great people, and they are not often in bars!

Some great places to meet people are activity clubs related to your interests, libraries and book stores, ballroom dancing (most ballroom places to not serve alcohol), yoga classes, cooking classes, etc. Also check out this website: http://www.meetup.com . It sounds like a dating website but it's actually a site designed to connect social groups with common interests. For instance people that work in a specific field, people who play specific games (like chess clubs), and all sorts of things. You can find groups in your local area, and especially when you are in a more populated area, there are tons of groups. For instance there is a hiking group in your area, so you can get exercise, make new friends, maybe even meet a nice lady. :

http://www.meetup.com/Maryland-Hiking/calendar/13088331/

Or here's one for shyness and social anxiety:

http://www.meetup.com/The-Baltimore-Shyness-and-Social-Anxiety-group/

Looks like there are 700+ groups in your area within 25 miles:

http://www.meetup.com/find/us/md/baltimore/?sort=founded_date&show=results

So I also wanted to speak to your depression.. depression can be either biological or psychological in nature, or both. One thing that is common with depression is that it is often caused by vitamin deficiencies such as vitamin B or D. You might want to take more vitamin B and get some sunshine.



HTH...

well now here is someone who looks like they know what im going through, just had a complete reversal last month then they had to go back in and put a drain and remove scar tissues, have not been eatingwell but hey i know how you felt when you said you cried cause you could eat again i did the same thing , the thing is now im still loosing cant eat much and mybowls dont work unless i make them cant ride or sit for longperiods of time for pain so severe in side went to hosp today they said every thing was ok on cat scan no blockage and my blood numbers are well wasstill in pain when i came home got script and took aother laxitive, is this the way its gonna be forever? i fell doc is giving me brush off and i dont like it at all when i called himhe said to see apainmanagemnt doc and he did not want me to see himin the office

This thread has been wonderfully informative...especially OldMedic's post.  Thanks to all!

Shengdanjie...sorry for the misspelling!!  :-)