What a useless rude response to someones personal experience. I'm referring to the "you don't know your body....blahblah...".post.

Shengdanjie,

Thank you so much for posting your experience. I am currently struggling with the decision I made to have RnY in 2010. Since, having my surgery I feel like I am a completely different person. Before I felt like I knew who I was and although a little uncomfortable with my weight I was happy. I was 22 at the time of my surgery and I feel like I wasn't old enough or informed enough to make such a drastic decision to change my life. I saw other family members have the surgery with little complications. No one talked about all the things that could go wrong. While other family members did well with the surgery I was constantly throwing up. Everything made me sick to the point where you don't even want to attempt to eat because I was scared I'd get sick. I am constantly tired, mentally drained and some days all I want to do is lay in bed. Over the last three years I have felt very alone and not normal due to the surgery. 

On the brighter side...I am thankful for people on this website and others who have shared their stories. I have never been one for blogs but feeling so alone these last three years has brought me here. It is so nice to see that I am not alone in my fears and concerns. That there is hope to work towards being happier and enjoying life again!

I know how you feel. I am one week after surgery. I went through the same feelings. I didn't expect the pain after surgery. I am still not 100%. The reflux is terrible. I know once my stomach and esophagus heals it will be better.

Keep a daily journal. Write down your feelings.

You didn't become obese overnight. The solution won't happen overnight.

You have had major surgery! To take this step you had to be committed to a life style change. No, your life will never be the same. It will be better.

I had gastric bypass surgery over 4 years ago.  I lost 100 lbs.  Was married for over 23 years from the age of 18 to a man 8 years older than me.  Two children, mortgage, grandchild, etc.  I began getting a lot of attention from men and wasn't getting attention at home for about the last 23 years.  Well, I made a poor decision and slept with someone.  He ended up being a very mean spirited person, so to say the least, the experience was not very nice.  I was filled with guilt only having been with my husband for 23 years.  This began a downward spiral of poor choices, it seemed that I became addicted to the attention and sex from men.  I continued having sex with that man, and do not know why, there was really nothing great about him or the experience.  Then when that ended I continued to look by joining an on line dating site, you would be surprised how many men really do not care if your married and only want sex. I know, I know... What can I say, this was all new for me.  Now the lies and guilt were overwhelming me and I could not bring myself to have sex with my husband at all, in fact it made me ill.  But I would have sex with any other man that I found attractive knowing that it would only be a one time thing.  Now, after a few months of this and fighting with myself on how to stop, I went to see a therapist, in fact two of them and they were useless.  I couldn't stop, it actually hurt and made me feel awful if I tried.  I became a sex addict.  I continued to see this man about ten years younger than me and another one 5 years older.  They wanted to continue seeing me.  I began juggling my married life, work, and the two affairs.  It was exhausting!  I slowly stopped seeing the younger man, but only because he was transferred out of town.  At this point I was starting to fall for the other one.  I told my husband, he still didn't want the divorce, but I insisted and we divorced, sold our brand new home we built from the ground up and only lived in 3 years.  I live in my childhood home with that guy I fell for and my x has a new girlfriend that is 15 years younger than him.  He gives her all his attention and all his money and she is happy to take it.  We stayed friends.  The last two years have been a hot mess.  I don't know what the hell I was thinking or doing, I couldn't stop.  I had to really work at it and it took a long time.  My relationship with the new guy is good, he treats me very good and gives me attention and were best friends that have really good sex.  I never had that before.  But I know this... that i would have never done anything like that before my surgery.  It's like I lost myself.  I'm glad it's over and I am very careful to control my actions now. 

I am so sorry to hear about your health issues. Are you having heart attacks because of calcium build up?  I'm asking because I was watching a medical show not too long ago and the doc was talking about getting too much calcium and that it gets stored in your arteries if you are getting too much of it. I really hope that you find a doc that can help you get this under control. So sorry...