I Regret Having RNY

I'm sorry to say it but i regret having this surgery. I didn't know how bad i would feel afterwards. Even though everyone say it will get better. I don't think i want to live the rest of my life like this. I was much happier being able to eat whatever i want and not having my stomach hurt and feeling terrible. I have found a doctor who is willing to do a reversal for me. I just have to come up with the money. My advice to anyone who wants to do this. Just be sure you want to change your eating for the rest of your life. It's not easy and it's no pinic in the park either. God Bless You ALL Jackie Garcia

Give your self some time it takes a while to heal I am a year out and I am able to eat what I wont but for some reason I like fresh fruits and veggies best now but there are times I wont cake and candy and I have it you will be able to have these to but I hope you are like me and love the good for you foods I know you get tired of people saying it will get better but they are telling you the truith it will

Oh Jackie you sound just like I did!! I had my RNY June 11 of last year and i was soooo miserable I just hated everything and everyone! I was sick, I hurt so bad I even had to go back into the hospital cuz my stoma closed up! I just knew I had made the worst mistake of my life and in almost 55 yrs. I have made a few!!! It took at least 4 mos. until I came around to believing that maybe just maybe I might just make it through this! At almost a year I am so very happy I had this done I look good but most of all I feel great!!!! I still haven't eaten bread or anything breaded but I eat a bit of everything else and I know if you give yourself time you will feel the same. I truly think all of us feel the same way, we just don't say it. Write me if you want I might be able to help. Love&Hugs, Connie

Hi Jackie, You have all the right to not be happy with the choice you made to have the surgery. I had a lap band and had some problems with it and I had mine reversed one month after having it put in. I hope every thing works out for you... Hang in there and god bless...Julie

Hi Jackie.. I was reading your post about being regretful. I wanted to share a few things with you so that you can consider them as you are working through your feelings. You are just one month out. As you progress things will get better, smoother..and you will be able to eat whatever you want to. Just a small portion. Your tummy won't hurt and you won't throw up. I am one year out...I've lost 122 lbs and am no longer a diabetic. It was an intense year of changes...adjustments..learning and being active about my health.... but now, I can eat anything (except I eat very little sweets...very little..and minimal pasta/bread)...but otherwise I eat everything...and just focus on getting in my protein. It is VERY COMMON to feel regret during the first few months after major surgery. You have anesthesia in your system that can make you emotional and blue. I really recommend talking with a counselor...getting involved in a support group....maybe visiting your local church/pastor...to help you with your transition. A nutritionist can be a good way to get counsel and instruction and information along your journey. Try to get in your exercise..start small and work up. Exercise helps us with our seratonin levels...our endorphines....and all that brain action will help you feel better about yourself and about things. You haven't ruined the rest of your life. Counselling can help you cope with losing your friend, FOOD. When we lose food as our comfort...sometimes we can mourn that loss. Get counselling... there's plenty of groups out there that can help you feel hopeful...encouraged... Do you have support around you? Talk with a close friend about how you are feeling and ask them to support you through this walk. I wish I lived closer, I'd love to meet with you and help you in anyway I could. Follow the food plan of your surgeon as close as you can. This will help the stoma heal and get you to eating regular foods - in a safe way- as soon as possible. Do some thing to cheer you...buy new undies..go on a little getaway...get a massage...join a gym with a jacuzzi...watch a sunset from the mountain. WHATEVER IT TAKES....Jackie, you are worth it... your health is worth it. Call your surgeon and talk with the patient coordinator about how you feel...they may have some other suggestions for you... Some medication may help you through this time too...although I don't recommend it...it does help some people in times of need. Take care... Keep your chin up.... Karen

Dear Jackie: You sound just like I sounded at one month out...And some days still sound. I still regret some days having the surgery myself - even having reached my goal weight and looking great. (My aunt told me that I look the way I did at 18 - which is wonderful...but not sure if it was worth the price.) That said - I would strongly encourage you to hold off making any decisions about a reversal for at least another 5 months. Your body has just gone through a major surgery - don't subject it to another one too soon. I truly believe that there are more people out there that regret having the surgery then you see post on here. Simply because they get flamed so quickly for saying how they feel. I know - that if I personally never gave exercise and diet a 100% effort. And I regret that. Hang in there. My thoughts are w/ you. Anne

Jackie - I think it is way too soon to make a judgement. Yes, certainly you can feel this way, but it might just be a phase. I haven't had WLS yet - I'm only in the beginning of the process. But a couple years ago I had to have both my knees replaced at the age of 51. I had been through a horrible time of pain and crutches and finally being bedridden - after almost 3 years of losing weight and walking marathons! I was blindsided by the whole thing and confused and scared by the pain and disability. Naturally I had to go thru with the surgery to have both knees replaced so that I could walk again. The surgery was a nightmare. I had trouble with pain control not to mention all the physical therapy and learning to walk again. I was tired and weak and mad as hell over the whole thing. My best friend tried to encourage me and asked "wasn't it worth it to be able to walk again?" She was SHOCKED that I had to think about it! It was such a trying experience that I couldn't say it was worth it for a long time. The recovery period was one year and the "startup pain" (for getting out of bed or a chair) was about 9 months. It did take all that time to adjust and I had to go back to work just 7 weeks post-op. This is after having a surgeon literally cut your legs apart and put them back together! Now it has been a couple years and of course I am glad I can walk. The pain of that surgery is just a memory now and I can focus on the miracle of good that came out of it. So please, give yourself time and think of anything good that you can. Mourn for what you have lost and what you are going through because it is part of the process, and know that time does pass and you will adjust. And keep posting! That's what the forum is for! Hugs to you, Starr

I agree with the others here ... you havent given it enough time yet, Jackie. I felt the same way that you do, when I was just this short time out. The first 2-3 months are gonna be really really rough. But if you hang in there, you will be glad that you did. I have had lots of problems after surgery -- and even I, once in awhile, still think I regret it. But overall -- looking at the whole picture, I am very glad I did the surgery, and would do it again. Please wait awhile longer .... Susan

Jackie! Give yourself some more time. I am just 6 months out, and yes, there are days I regret having done this, BUT, I regret it for the WRONG reasons. We have this surgery (hopefully) to improve our health. We got to the point of our obesity becuase of bad eating habits. Those habits are HARD to break! Yes, when I have a piece of pizza, I regret not being able to eat 6 more delicious pieces, BUT, that is not the reason I had this surgery. I feel I am lucky I CAN eat a piece of pizza and enjoy it. I have lost nearly 100 pounds in 6 months and can enjoy anthing I used to enjoy (except sweets). I am off all diabetic medications, all blood pressure medications, and off artritus pain medications. How great is that! in 6 months I am already healthier than I have been in years! PLUS I can enjoy doing things that I couldn't do 6 months ago. Who can regret being healthy. If you regret not being able to eat unhealthy foods, or overeat until you are in pain from more food than you need, then you had the surgery for the wrong reasons. At this point in the healing process, you are going to still be in some pain. That is normal for any major surgery. You are weak, that too is normal for ANY major surgery. As you start getting your stregnth back, you will start to have more energy. Give it time. Don't make the decision to reverse the proceedure just yet. That is another major surgery, and I am sure you will go through the same healing process with that. Good luck.

First of all, its a shame that you have had a bad experience with your surgery. Also, we ALL are or were happy just being able to eat what we want to eat whenever we want..It's a copout to not having to deal with the root of why we're depressed or unhappy. Unfortunately after awhile the pounds creep on and we are left feeling even more helpless and unhappy which leads us to eat more and become heavier..I haven't had the surgery yet but I'm convincing myself that the physical pain as well as not being able to gorge myself will fade away in time. You may say "well you dont know how much pain I'm in". I myself have had 2 children, been through 7 major surgeries minus 5 ribs part of my lung part of my sternum and minus 1 collarbone. I've also had breast reduction and my gallbladder out. I've also had 6 weeks of radiation therapy. Granted while this surgery will be painful I'm sure the pain will fade in time. (hopefully) As for not being able to eat heartily, I may not be able to eat what I want when I want but I sure will have the energy to play with my kids! I'll also not have to go to special stores to find clothes that fit. I wont have people staring when I eat and wont have 20 years knocked off my life due to health risks of obesity. I know its going to be rough not being able to eat but I plan on going to a counselor for support and I have friends and family. I hope my view point helped. I'm not passing judement on you just offering another point of view thats all. Good luck!