Let me keep it real

Lady A, I want to first say i hope things get better for you both mentally and physically. I have not had surgery but my date is 1-17-05 so I can not speak on complications but I will trust God that everything will work out. I believe you should be thanking God that you are alive and healthy and that your Husband is having great sucess and if you spend more time in prayer God will deliver you from the anger within ask him to give you strentgh to do what it takes to loose more weight. I know this is not going to be easy but It was not easy being overweight either and if i only loose 30 pound thats more than i could have done on my own i just pray for no complications and thank God you did not suffer any either. I am sure you will rip into me and that is fine because the battle is not mine its the Lord but I just wanted to say to everyone who have posted that you all should be grateful for what God has brought you through and where he can take you if we all stop being negative. I know there will come a day when i to will get mad about this surgery but I will pray my way through it and use this site as a positive tool to reach out for support and advice on how to get through these times not to bash the only means that i had to loose the weight. I wish you much sucess and peace. I am a very blunt person also but I have learned how to use that positively because it reaches more people, so if you have a story to tell try comming accross a little nicer tell some of the positive things as well as the negative. This is from one sistah to another dont make us look bad with all that but keep keeping it real peace.

First of and foremost, may you recover well from your surgery. Second of all if you check my profile out, you will see that over 10,000 people have viewed it as well as on any givin day I receive 200 to 300 personal emails. I get tons of responses from people telling me how they thank me for my bluntness, because many of the things i speak candidly about they were afraid to ask. I also have my own online support group as well as a Non Profit Organization. I have had over 4 fundraisers, I have assisted at least 500 people with protein supplements, vitamins and even cash towards surgery. With all of that being said, let me say to you that I in no way am making my race look bad. I have no intentions on bashing you, but until you have walked in my shoes, please do not judge me or perceive me as being negative. If i remember correctly the forum was for WLS Regret and that was the place for me to place my disappointment. HE WHO WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE!!! See, I know the bible and GOD as well. Again much love and success to you and when you become post op and know a little more about what goes on after surgery, then you give me a holla MY SISTAH!!!!

o my goodness...i just had to comment on what u said persia...i dont think in anyway shape or form is lady A making our race look bad..she is simply stating her feelings...what does race have to do with it...? that is her feelings and she is totally entitled to that!! where does her skin pigment come into the factor...i dont know ladyA, i didnt even have the RNY, but i know her frustrations when it comes too WLS..b/c i am also post op with the lap band..and at times we all want to vent about our frustrations...and that OK...nothing wrong with that..that is what this forum is all about...venting and letting loose..and then moving on... but i just hate when race becomes a unnescary factor..........................

So glad I found this thread. I'm still just in the "looking for information" phase. I've been on this site pretty much 4 days running now. I am just not sure I can do it. Becky

Lady A. For real...this exercise thing sucks. Honestly. I am busting my a$$ exercising and its hardly making a difference!!! We were told we would have to exercise ... but I just figured ... what the doctor always says to anyone who visits regardless of wls you know. BUT I didnt know it was to determine if you are to loose or not. (I mean everyone knows if you exercise it helps) but I mean... I eat so little compared to before and if I ate this way before wls PLUS the exercise I am doing the weight would be flying off!! BUT somehow it seems my metabolism has GREATLY diminished because it makes no sense why I am not loosing weight like crazy!!! I started at 334 and im only 5'4 I have been stuck in the 220's for 3 months now. Yes the holidays were rough but I STILL did not eat even remotely what I ate before wls AND I exercised and NOW I have been really sticking to the "diet" and STILL am not loosing.... Know when I lost... when I got sick and had to do clear liquids for 2 days. yep lost 6 pounds then...but since then havent lost a lick and believe me I have been sticking to it!!! exercising like mad and everything. stupid exercise. I really have to force myself to do it. No one mentioned WHY or how come I dont loose and WHY my metabolism seems to be greatly affected by surgery. PLUS I can eat alot.. (NOT that I go around eating alot for all those -"well why would you do that" people) But I have tested and even the doctor said... yeah at least 12 ounces. shoot! 12!!! I was told 3 meals a day no snacking. Holy crap that is hard!!! I have been working with that... but yep... they definitely misinformed you if they did not tell you how hard you would have to work for it. We were told to stick to the rules alot in DE and they really stressed the importance of exercise and sticking to the plan, they have a program that informed us...but it still doesnt prepare you for how hard you really have to work. Some have to work ALOT ... and I stress ALOT harder than others for some reason. I guess each person is different. But I totally understand where you are comming from!!! I am working so hard and it seems like the tool isnt even there. It doesnt work for me like people lead on. (again each person is so different) I hardly dump (when i mess up -and we all do!) I can eat ALOT (not that I do mind you). you know you have to put that in parenthesis because there are those "Holier than thou" people out there who NEVER mess up. anyways... its definitely hard. you hang in there. One thing I can say about the exercise is that I am seeing that im getting toner and just the energy level is better... but girl... I hate exercising. Its hard!!! Well I guess since I had this surgery I am going to work harder to get to goal... I guess for me though despite how hard it is now... I guess I used the surgery as the "last resort" no excuse type of kick in the a$$ to get me to do something. Mentally it has prepared me to work harder because I risked my life to have the surgery so I better work it! know what i mean. But i definitely feel your frustration! Hang in there we will get to goal!! ((hugs)) Elizabeth M

Hello Adrienne! I'm sort of new to this board - meaning I really don't post. I just got my surgery date after a year of haggling. I had a therapist who dropped the ball and was trying to talk me out of the surgery. For a while, I thought God didn't want me to have it. So I stopped visiting the board. Well after getting my date of April 19, 2005 yesterday, I came to the board. I read your post from last year. You are a very dignified lady because you responded with class to the lady who spouted meaness to you months after your original post. I just wanted to know how you were doing and if things are much better for you now. I read the list of things you do for people and I'm impressed! I just found this forum today about regrets and I started to read it just so I could hear the other side. I admit that I'm afraid. I don't want to be a surgery failure or a weightloss failure. I'm not crazy about excercise either and I thought it wouldn't be as important too. At least that's what I thought before research. And like you said, the info may be better now than it was when you started your journey. It's hard to believe that I'm standing on the threshold of surgery. This is somewhere I never thought or wanted to be. If you have time, e-mail me. You seem like an angel I should have in my corner. God Bless You! "Throw your burdens upon Jehovah and He himself will sustain you. Never will he allow the righteous one to totter." Let's keep throwing our burdens upon Him together!

Hi Robin, Thank you for your kind words,I so appreciate them. When I wrote this post I was really going through some bad times and things were just not right and I was feeling really bad. I am doing much better these days and I still have my doubts and regrets, but I have learned to accept the things I can not change. I encourage you to go on full force with your surgery and remember that it is not the same for everybody. Please feel free to contact me anytime, I would love to talk with you Adrienne

Lady A - I just want you to know that i really appreciate all of the honesty that you have shown in your posts. I am pre-op and have been researching this for about a year. i am also a nervous wreck wondering if this is the right thing to do! I am waiting for approval and have been "jumping through hoops" for my insurance company. My doctor requires three nutritionist visits (I've done one so far), a psychological evaluation (just had it!) and much pre-op testing. he also stresses that i will have to do daily exercise and see him for the rest of my life.. I for one am glad because this gives me the opportunity to really have conviction in this surgery. I have attended about 5 "support type" meetings and I agree that there is a "sugar coating".. this is major surgery! .. and many things can go wrong! Thanks for being honest and open about your experience with this surgery.. it is much appreciated. :thumbs up" I wish you much success in your continued journey. Dee K

Thanks Dee, I appreciate your kind words and I wish you all the best on your upcoming surgery. Adrienne

WOW!! What drama!! Lady A... do your thing! Props on saying what you mean! Seems to me that it was the hardcore HBillies that had the most to say about this! You keep it real and let them live in there southern hick bliss.... It's a whole nother world there.. and NO YOU didnt make it a black and white thing.. the hoooooonkys did whom started their initial attack most likely because your black and thats it!! From another loud mouth who speaks her mind(who happens to be WHITE)! Long live the BILLIES.. they add that racial spice like nobody else can! Just my opinion from the Great white north!(Canada)!