PLEASE READ BEFORE YOU HAVE GB

Thank you for sharing.  Have you been to any AA/NA meetings ?

oh my , i am so drained now

Dear all,

My Sister 43 y/o had a GB October 25^th 2012... after she was in a lot of pain. Apparently they also damaged her spleen. 5 Days later she was supposed to go home, like the 2 others who had the same operation on the same day. Waiting to leave the hospital she truly felt, it was her last day alive. My sister is tough and never complains, but told the doctor about her pain... they made a scan and discovered a leak. Her stomach was already filled with bowel movement and was immediately operated again. It was a close call indeed. After this operation she was numb, very tired and mentally absence. We thought this was a result of the second anesthesia.  10 days after the second operation she was ready to go home on Friday November 9^th. What supposed to be a new beginning, got a totally different meaning after she took her own life the next day. Leaving her husband, son and family a note:

Goodbye
I know I will hurt you a lot by doing this.
I’ve shouldn’t have done this operation. I’m tired, I can’t deal with it anymore.
You’re better off without me. I know my husband and son are in good hands with the family.
I need too much care, I know you’re willing giving me this with much love, but I’m exhausted. The old me is never coming back.

I LOVE YOU ALL

And now she is gone… leaving us with many questions… what went wrong? Is there anyone who can help us understand this more…

 

 

Wow.... there are no words to express the depth of your despair! My heart and prayers are with you. Many times we are left wondering what happened, what didn't happened, and why we didn't see it coming. Please know that the love we shared with another human being is the most important thing and the only thing we remember when it all comes to an end. I wish there was some way to fill in the huge chasm that must have formed in your life. Hang in there

B

i've had 3 heart attacks since wls,, one from too high calcium in my heart arteries, and i wasnt taking 3 to 4 calcium pills a day.Found out too much calcium clogs the heart arteries.. the second heart attack was from very low potassium,  low potassium makes the heart weak...the next one was when i was in the

I C U during the 3rd heart attack , the hospital gave me grapefruit and when mixed with medications is bad sometimes causing fatal results.. I survived but I do very much regret having wls.. I will never recommend it to anyone. both my adult kids are very overweight. I keep stressing to them never get wls.. well my 28 yr old daughter is currently working on loosng weight on her own with 10 lbs lost so far.. and has been smoke free for 3 months now with the help of the patch..anyway this is my current status. I probably wont live long I'm 55 ...but whats done is done..I have maintained my weight loss thru all this..I wont be able to do any more of the activities I was doing because my heart is very weak.. PeaceV Wendy

Brian-thanks for your post. I empathize with you. I had BPDDS (bilio-pancreatic diversion with duodenal switch) in 2002 at age 34. The psychiatric test didn't rule me out, & I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at age 18 & had spent 2 separate stints in hospital lockdown between ages 18 & 34. I am 5'2", my weight at surgery was 286. Health wise, no diabetes, just hypertension, back pain, knee pain, foot pain, headaches... Other than bipolar, that's all. According to doc, a perfect surgical candidate. He even recommended the BPDDS! I had open surgery, not laparoscopic, so very hard recovery. 2 surgeries within a year post-op for hernia repairs. Tummy-tuck with 2nd repair. Slowly I started having issues with the malabsorption of my medications (doc mentioned the procedure would result some malabsorption of nutrients, he never mentioned it would do the same to medications and I was too starry-eyed to realize that!). I have been on disability now for 4 years because I cannot get my psych meds stabilized. I take about 50 pills daily ( there is 1med alone that I must take 9 pills of a day to get the proper amt into my bloodstream), its extremely hard for me to get them all in properly. In addition, the fact that I have only 4 feet of functioning small intestine has resulted in severe digestive issues (painful abdominal cramping & bloating, uncontrollable flatulence and daily diarrhea) for the past ELEVAN YEARS! At least I know now the digestive issues can be controlled by not eating wheat, or Gluten, products. Thank goodness! But my psychiatrist has no answers for the meds. 4 hospital stays in the past 4 years. Hypertension has returned. I've gained about 40 lbs, and my body looks strange. No, not just in my mind. My lower abdomen (tummy tuck area) is still flat as a fritter and always will be. The weight gain starts at my belly button and I have a true barrel upper abdomen. Actually hard to breathe because of the weight pressing on my lungs and diaphragm, and clothes fit improperly. All of these issues have made me say more than once that I would never have had the surgery if I knew then what I know now. It's so hard to tell others of the bad parts of WLS as they are so starry-eyed. I know I was. But I was a pioneer. In 2002 there weren't a lot of people 11 years post-op to advise me. And, like you, I agree that each individual's experience is just that-an individual . I wouldn't wish this experience on anyone.

Before my surgery I knew I had an addictive personality.  During the times I was able to control the food my spending and other negative behaviors would swing out of control.  About 6 years ago I invested time in therapy and also joined a 12-step program to deal with my compulsive overeating.   Did it magically make me skinny?  No, but it gave me some great tools for how to live life and how to be accountable for my behavior.  Periodic therapy visits and regular attendance at OA are critical to the success I'm having now.  I'm really glad I had these things in place before surgery...otherwise I could easily be in your shoes, Brian. 

If 12-step programs don't seem like a good fit for you (the spirituality component freaks some people out), then please look for programs like Rational Recovery or go to www.soverrecovery.com and do research on a program that sounds appealing.  You will appreciate the support and the new view of life it will give you.

Wishing you the best...

Tracy